


Lost in Fire

by I_am_lucky_thirteen



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: A little Beautiful Disaster au, F/M, Teen Wolf AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-07
Updated: 2015-09-25
Packaged: 2018-04-03 07:15:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 50,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4091983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_am_lucky_thirteen/pseuds/I_am_lucky_thirteen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU Stydia. At college, Lydia and Stiles meet, due to their friends Scott and Allison. They bicker and they are not fond of each other, though they are attracted to each other. Tension, flirt, banter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Little One and the douchebag.

It was supposed to be a normal girls’ night out.  
Lydia Martin closed her eyes for a brief second. The music was annoyingly bumpy, and the apartment itself smelled like beer and… _guys_. Now that wasn’t a disgusting smell, but that wasn’t exactly what she had imagined, when her best friend dragged her out tonight. She imagined a normal club, in college area, of course, though maybe something a little more elegant and girly.  
People here moved like in slow motion. There were some couples in the corners, and some drunken freshmen, but mostly everyone looked a little stoned. There wasn’t much noise, except the one made by loudspeakers.  
“Come on Lydia!” Allison quickly turned back to grab her friend’s hand to lead her forward, where there was less crowded.  
Redhead immediately smiled at her. She loved her friend way too much to ruin her fun. And, by all means, Lydia could do anyplace, as long as it was with her friends.  
She realized that it was probably a party thrown for freshmen; Lydia recognized some faces from yesterday’s feast.  
“There he is!” Allison squeaked.  
“Who is?” Lydia laughed at her friend’s sudden enthusiasm.  
Brunette shot her a smile along with crazily excited eyes.  
“Okay, remember that guy I told you about? From that day, when we were on tour for Berkeley?!”  
Her friend giggled, still making her way through the crowd, her black dress hovering on her thighs. Now it actually made sense. Of course they were here for a reason. She was finally going to meet the famous Scott. A guy Allison went crazy about, after about two days of acquaintance. She remembered hearing every little detail of an oh-so-famous-McCall, or as Allison called him, her man at first sight.  
“Vividly!” Lydia yelled through the music.  
On the couch, to which Allison was probably leading her, sat only three guys and Lydia tried to guess which one was he.  
There was a tall, attractive guy with caramel curly hair with a smug smile on his face. He held a beer in his hand and talked with the other one. Everything he said looked like he was flirting, though Lydia was sure that he wasn’t. It was just the way his words left his mouth; she could see it from afar. Whatever he was saying to the guy with dark hair, it made him look all giddy. Like everything was a dirty story for him.  
His companion, the cuter one, had dark hair and honest smile playing on his face. Maybe it was because of light effects, but for a second there, it seemed like the dude had uneven jaw line. Lydia noted that he seemed like a very friendly guy, with his puppy eyes, which would turn into two lines, whenever he was laughing.  
She couldn’t take a good look at the last guy, because he stood up and walked away before the girls reached them. From the way he walked though, he seemed like the confident one. Wherever he was walking to, he felt no problem with getting people out of his way. Lydia watched him casually slip his hands on any girl’s waist, just to push them to the side a little. She could clearly see that wasn’t actually necessary, he could obviously just walk around them.  
She lost the sight of him somewhere among people, before considering how much of a player he is.  
When she stopped analyzing the last guy, they reached the handsome one and cute one.  
“So it is the cute one…” Lydia assumed to herself.  
She smiled as Allison hooked her arms around the guy with the dark hair. He seemed to enjoy her happiness, caused by seeing him and he hugged her back just as eagerly.  
Now that they have gotten closer, Lydia saw that Scott DID have an uneven jaw, and he also seemed Mexican.  
“Hi!” The tall guy interrupted her thoughts by getting up and walking around the happy couple to get to her. He liked her immediately, her curly hair of a color of red or ginger, he couldn’t tell, was bouncing lower her shoulders. She was much much shorter than him.  
“I’m Isaac, nice to meet you.” He introduced himself in a British accent, to which Lydia raised her eyebrow slightly.  
“Lydia.” She shook his hand.  
“Freshman, right?” He took a gulp of his beer.  
Lydia nodded.  
The music was still too lurid for a normal conversation, so she stood to her tiptoes a little and Isaac bowed to her level.  
“Mind showing me where the bathroom is?” She asked loudly.  
Isaac pointed her to the corridor near the stairs to the second floor and she smiled in gratitude. Walking past a Scott and Allison, who were now on the couch, she smiled friendly to Scott and he did the same in response.  
She noticed a forming line to the bathroom and rolled her eyes in irritation. One bathroom. Lydia figured that it was probably a normal apartment of some college guys, and without the people and music and trash, she would imagine that this was quite a decent place to live. Even a good one, for a student.  
“Mind stepping forward, Little One?” A male voice from behind startled her.  
Lydia turned around just to stand face to…chest with some dude, who had the most arrogant expression on his face. His hazel eyes were beaming at her, and he half smiled down to her.  
Lydia recognized that this was probably the confident one, who had left the couch earlier. She figured it out only by seeing his shoulders again. Girl couldn’t help but check him out a little; if Isaac was attractive, then this guy was the hands down handsome. He had very dark, almost black messy hair, which matched his deep eyes, and his pupils were dangerously dilated, but it went perfectly with the bad boy look he was creating.  
“Little One?” She asked just as annoyed.  
He raised his eyebrows up, and tilted his head a little.  
“Are you a freshman?” He ignored her question.  
Lydia rolled her eyes at his irritating tone. He was so confident, so smug. It was sexy. No, he definitely was, but he was a womanizer from the first sight, and it bothered her that he looked at her like she was a prize he had to win.  
She shot him one last fuming look and turned away from him.  
So he got a little closer and coughed, as if he wanted to say something.  
Lydia took a small breath and turned to face him with the sweetest smile she could possibly make.  
“Yes?” She asked politely.  
He smiled at that.  
He enjoyed that he annoyed her.  
“Are you a freshman?” He tried again.  
“Yes, obviously.” She finally answered. “And I don’t remember seeing you, so I assume, you’re not.”  
“So you say, if you would have seen me yesterday, you would have remembered me, huh?” He winked.  
“I just have a radar for assholes, sweetheart.” Lydia smirked.  
He laughed out loud throwing his head backwards. In those two seconds Lydia saw how the veins on his neck bulged as he laughed. That was so attractive she bit her lip subtly.  
Still, that didn’t change the fact that the guy was a pig. The way he stood a little too close than appropriate to her, and his black shirt perfectly fit his strong hands and torso. None of it changed the fact that the guy was bad news.  
“You have a point. I’m Stiles.” His dark eyes lingered on hers.  
Lydia forgot all her sassy acting at the sound of his name. Stiles? Stiles? Whose name is Stiles?  
“Stiles.” Redhead repeated calmly, masking her perplexity.  
“You know who I am?” He smirked again. Seriously, Lydia thought, who is that smug all the time?  
“Don’t flatter yourself,” Lydia said, and surprising both, herself and Stiles, patted his chest. His breathing hitched a bit but he covered it by moving a millimeter away from her, his facial expression encouraging her to continue talking. Provoking. “Just racking my head here, thinking, what the hell kind of name is a Stiles?”  
“Oh, I like it.” He smiled at her once again.  
“Oh, really? Well that’s unexpected.”  
“Oh, yeah, Little One. I heard my name being screamed loudly and whispered quietly in most thrilling situations. Believe me.”  
Lydia furrowed her eyebrows together, irritated buy the striking, yet so arrogant fellow in front of her. In the line for peeing.  
“Seriously, you get laid speaking like this?”  
Once again he quivered with the howling laughter. This girl excited him.  
Stiles’ features were actually cute when he was laughing and after peeking at him, she smiled herself.  
“Ah! I see a genuine smile, huh?” Stiles chuckled a little.  
Lydia shook her head a little, thinking what she was still doing talking to him, when his intentions seemed obvious.  
“Anyway,” she said. “it was nice meeting you, Stiles. Not that type of girl.”  
For a few seconds he seemed taken aback and Lydia’s pride purred inside her, filling her with warming feel of winning. Of course, he was not used to hearing No. But then he nodded and narrowed his eyes at her a little.  
“Seems like I’ve finally found one.” Stiles said respectfully. His eyes were reading her, like he couldn’t quite understand why she practically rejected him, and at the same time he looked at her with admiration, like she had just passed his test.  
Her gaze lingered on his a little longer, for half a second dropping to his pink lips.  
He took a step closer to her, looking like a savage, while doing it. His look on her immediately went from teasing to…hungry? She couldn’t comprehend it.  
So Lydia slowly took a step back and walked around him, intentionally brushing her hair on his arm, her scent reaching him.  
He never tasted anything so sweet, so capturing as the smell of her perfume. Or was it just her?  
“And you are?” He asked checking out her seductive figure, while she was slowly walking away from him back to the party.  
This guy was a prince. He was fickle. He was inappropriate. He was arrogant. Lydia knew, he was WRONG.  
“Done now.” She shot a smile looking back at him.  
Walking towards Allison, Scott and Isaac, she still wore a smile on her face. Yeah, he sure was a jackass, but he was still interesting. Although, maybe it was exactly what he wanted her to think of him.  
“Something funny?” Scott asked grinning. “We haven’t officially met, I’m afraid. Scott, but I guess you knew that.”  
“Lydia.” She offered him her hand and he took it.  
Isaac offered Lydia a drink and she took it with delight. She needed one. Taking a swig of what seemed to be tequila and Coke, girl thought about the bathroom guy. Stiles. God she hoped he won’t see him again here. This guy was something.  
“You okay, babe?” Allison asked. She had Scott’s arm hooked around her.  
“I am.” Lydia winked at her.  
Sooo, my best friend is around here somewhere.” Scott said happily. “The minute I see him, I’ll introduce you. He’s a nice dude.”  
“He’s a douchebag,” Isaac noted laughing.  
Lydia smirked.  
“Must be my lucky day, then.” The boys laughed and Allison just shook her head in amusement.  
“It’s impossible to set this one up with someone.” She said to Scott and Isaac.  
“Really?”  
“Yup.” The brunette nodded at her friend. “Most of them don’t catch up with her wit. Actually I don’t mind, as her personal wing-woman, I can assure you Lydia, you haven’t met the worthy.” She added, sounding like overprotective big sister.  
Isaac wrinkled his eyebrows and turned to Scott.  
“Sounds familiar to you?”  
Scott laughed at that, increasing girls’ curiosity.  
“Yeah, but see our douchebag, as smart as he is, is a douchebag. That’s why he flirts with everything from the age of babies to toothless women. Tha-Yo, whaddup, man?!”  
Lydia closed her eyes in annoyance at the guy who was apparently Scott’s best friend. She was between laughing and rolling her eyes.  
“Stiles! Come meet these beautiful ladies.”  
Lydia watched as Stiles approached Allison and shook her hand, checking her out up and down.  
“My brother has a taste.” He flashed at her and Allison seemed happy with her evaluation.  
“And this-“ Scott started, pulling his girl closer to his side, but Stiles was quicker. He already stared back at Lydia happily, like a kid, who had just gotten a candy.  
“This is the Little One.” He stated sassy.  
“This is the douchebag.” She backfired.  
For a minute three of them observed the dark boy and the red girl. Stiles looked like he was eating her with her eyes and Lydia was a whirl between frustration and curiosity.  
“No, dude…” Scott said, his eyes going back and forth to Lydia and Stiles. He knew this look on his best friend all too well.  
“I’m Stiles. Stilinski.” He held out his hand to her and she took it after a second of consideration.  
“The one and only.” She couldn’t help herself.  
“Are you done? Now?” He asked half smiling. Stiles tried to avoid how nicely her little hand fit his one and how his always cold fingers enjoyed the pulling warmness from her, spreading over his palm.  
“And there goes a point for you. I’m Lydia Martin.”  
He stood there dangerously close to her, his thumb rubbing circles on her hand. That he was still holding. He watched her like a predator, but she stood her own. Though Lydia blinked a few times, she still held his gaze.  
“Stiles? Dude?!” Isaac clicked his fingers in front of his friend.  
“Snap out of it, Stiles. And don’t even think about it. She’s like my sister.” Allison said, pretending to sound casually, but she was obviously intrigued.  
Scott closed his eyes for a brief second and shook his head.  
“Baby, you just told him no.”  
“So?”  
“So now he’s not going to stop.” Isaac added.  
Lydia listened to them and finally pulled her hand out of Stiles’ tight grip.  
“What are you, a child, if someone tells you you can’t have it, you want it more?”  
He snorted and licked his lips.  
“Yes.” Both Scott and Isaac answered, to which Lydia laughed.  
“That’s a lovely sound.” Stiles stated.  
Lydia rolled her eyes again but still couldn’t help but smile.  
“See, I can make you smile? I’m not a total bastard.” He put his fist in the air like he had just won something.  
“I didn’t say you were a bastard.”  
“Do I dare say, that you, princess, implied?”  
“No.” Lydia smiled. “I just don’t like the idea of making a foregone conclusion about flirting with me, for the sole reason of having a vagina.”  
He left out an honest laugh and looked at the girl with absolute adoration.  
“Clever as the Devil, and twice as pretty.”  
Whole group except for Stiles took a slug of their drinks. This was getting interesting.  
“I am really starting to dislike you, honey.” Lydia said, feeling the liquid courage running through her.  
“You know what they say, dislike is akin to lust.”  
“That’s not an expression.”  
“It is in my world.”  
Now it was her time to laugh. This boy was forwardly amatory but at the same time he looked like a kid in a candy store.  
“Are you actually saying these words?” She giggled.  
“You laugh like a four year old.” Stiles noted amused, his eyes getting wider and wider, as she enjoyed talking to this girl in front of her.  
“I was just thinking the same about you.” The girl answered.  
He coughed in disbelief and took one confident step closer.  
“I’m pretty sure you were just undressing me with your eyes.”  
Lydia’s lips slowly curved into a smile and leisurely walked to him, mirroring his confidence. Not enough that she was already very close to him, she stood on her tiptoes, and leaned into his ear.  
Her ravishing smell made him dizzy, just as her soft breathing over his neck.  
“Believe me, Stiles Stilinski, I was adding more clothes.” She whispered.  
_She was teasing him badly. In that moment, when she pulled away from him, he wanted to grab her like any other girl he knew and he could already count fifty different positions he could throw her on his bed. Everything about her made him ache. His pulse raced from her perfume, his lips wanted to kiss that sass off of her lips and he was sure that his burning eyes matched his quickening breathing._  
But at the same time, no matter what fantasy this amazing girl would take him to, he was attracted to her wit the most. She was obviously an educated girl, and smart was always sexy for him. No matter how she may have flirted with him tonight, or maybe, teased him tonight; he understood from their first conversation: she won’t put up with his shit. And that taunted him, badly.  
He had no idea what the hell has gotten into him. She got under his skin by just talking to him.  
“Okay, so...whatever it was.” Allison started.  
“Come on, we’ll walk you home.” Scott said.  
“They just came.” Stiles said, irritated, giving a fuming quick look to his best friend, then looking back at Lydia. Who, at this moment was not paying much attention to him.  
“I’m sorry I’m stealing her away from you, Scott.” Lydia said genuinely. “But we should go back to our dorm. Hey, don't look at me like that, I’m not a party pooper; it’s just that on the way here we got a message that something was broken with our boiler, or something? And I have to find out what it is, because I really need to shower tonight.”  
“I have a shower.” Stiles interrupted. Now for the first time all night, that didn’t sound like a pick up line, he was talking seriously.  
“Give it up, she’s not sleeping with you.” Isaac blurted out.  
Stiles nodded, still looking at Lydia.  
“ _I don’t want to sleep with her_. I’m being friendly to my best friend’s girlfriend’s best friend.”  
That caught her attention. So now, he didn’t want to sleep with her. Her questioning eyes almost gave her away but she managed to take control.  
“Thank you, _gentlemen,_ ” she emphasized. “But we’ll figure it out.”  
As they were saying their goodbyes, Allison and Scott were a mess of hands and dark hair, so Lydia decided to leave them for a minute there. She was extremely happy for her sister. And even though she didn’t know him, she mentally approved Scott. It’s those eyes!  
“Well,” Stiles disturbed her thoughts. “It was… surreal, meeting you, Little One.”  
“You know my name,” She smiled carefully at him.  
“But you are Little.”  
“I think my name maybe works better.”  
“I don’t really are what you think.” He answered, playfully.  
“Bye, Isaac, nice meeting you.” She smiled at the British guy and then turned to say goodbye to Stiles, as Allison was already making her way towards her.  
“Don’t worry, Lydia Martin, I’ll contact you.” The smug in his voice and on his face was back.  
She didn’t say anything; she just rolled her eyes at him, leaving him wanting for more.  
_She realized that she was going to see him again.  
Alcohol in her veins also told her that the man was rude, crude and inappropriate, and it was going to be raw, it was going to be ugly, and she is going to enjoy every damn minute of it._


	2. Polite

Girls chatted and laughed all the way to their dorm. It was nice feeling this carefree, even though school year has already started. Or, now probably they count as college year.  
Lydia looked at her best friend, who was still ranting about Scott. She felt a little relieved that the girl had finally found someone so close to her heart. Allison had a really tough time before. Both of them had. Bringing their own stories to college was not easy, but they were trying. This was supposed to be new beginning for both of them. Girls were super happy, getting away from their parents, from that little town itself, their heartbreaks, boyfriends, crazy teachers. Lydia and Allison grew up together, they took care of each other. They were sisters.  
“I’m meeting him tomorrow!” Allison squeaked.  
“Sure you are.” Lydia said with a smile.  
Suddenly Allison stopped in her tracks, bright smile playing on girl’s face.  
She shook her head a little, so dark hair covered her face a little and she brushed them of.  
“Lydia… I really like him.” She told shyly, her lips curving into even brighter smile.  
Her friend started laughing, also stopping, and stepping in front of her.  
“Ally,” she took her shoulders lightly. “I know. I can see it.”  
Allison let out exhilarating noise and jumped a little like a hyperactive kid.  
“It’s nice seeing you this way.” Lydia added lightly.  
“I just don’t know, Lydia…” She suddenly raised her eyes to the starry sky, spark in her own eyes mirroring them.  
“It’s like I’ve known him for a long time.” She said dreamy, slowly. She looked back at Lydia, who was smiling softly at her. “Maybe this year will be a good one. After all we’ve been through.” Words from her mouth sounded like a question.  
Lydia squeezed her shoulders in support.  
“It will be. C’mon, Allison, we got out. We’re in college. We made it.” She told triumphantly.  
Allison nodded at her, grinning.  
“We made it!”  
“WE MADE IT!”  
Hand in hand, laughter echoing through the camp, girls made their way home.  
“Dibs on shower!” Allison told.  
Lydia furrowed her eyebrows.  
“Okay, fine but hurry up. I need to wash tonight off of me.”  
Allison was already in the bathroom when she laughed and responded.  
“Hey, tonight wasn’t that bad!”  
Lydia face planted her bed, kicking her heels off.  
“No, it wasn’t. Still..”  
“You feel dirty from all the flirting with Stiles?!” Allison interrupted happily.  
Lydia immediately popped on her elbow, disgust on her face.  
“Allison Argent!” She exclaimed, blowing her strawberry blonde curls off her face. “That guy is a rotter.” She bit her lip, remembering him. “Okay, maybe not that bad, but he is bad news, okay? And I was not flirting, I was backfiring that asshole.”  
She could already imagine Allison rolling her eyes, distrustful expression on her face.  
“Sure.” Lydia heard her murmur.  
“I heard that!” Lydia yelped and lay down properly again.  
Allison didn’t respond, and Lydia heard the water running.  
No, tonight indeed wasn’t that bad. And the…company wasn’t either. She really liked Scott, giving the fact that Lydia knew nothing about him; he seemed like a nice guy. And Allison really liked him, so it was a done deal.  
She couldn’t actually wrap her head around opinion on Isaac. They barely spoke, but the guy was definitely dashing, with his accent and manners. Lydia thought, maybe she would see him around sometime.  
But as hard as she tried to avoid it, of course she remembered Stiles. The douchebag. There was something about him that really annoyed Lydia. Maybe it was the way he talked to her, or the way he acted. Maybe just him, in general. She didn’t like him. No, she didn’t.  
She closed her eyes, telling that to herself, pushing down any chance of wanting to see him again.   
“Lydia!” Her thoughts were interrupted.  
“What is it?”  
Allison came into the room wrapped in a towel, disappointment on her face.  
“There’s no hot water.”  
Lydia immediately sat down.  
“What?! For how long?”  
Brunette shrugged.  
“I don’t know, call the chairman.”  
“I don’t have his number…” she answered frowning.  
Allison sighed.  
“Okay, I’ll call him.”  
Girl left the room again and Lydia groaned. Thought of not showering tonight was really bumming.  
Still, finally accepting that she probably won’t shower tonight, Lydia slipped into her pajamas, and patiently waited for Allison to talk to the chairman.  
She came out of the bathroom biting her lip and cursing.  
“How long?” Lydia asked, afraid to hear the answer.  
“They’re not sure.” She sighed.  
“WHAT?!”  
Lydia wrinkled her eyebrows, throwing her hands up in desperation and shook her head.  
“What the hell is this system?”  
“I don’t know,” Allison said just as irritated. “Apparently it’s the whole dorm and people have been freaking out all night.”  
“Well, duh. Fucking Christ.” She cursed. “What are we gonna do?”  
Allison yawned.  
“Let’s figure it out in the morning, shall we? I’m beat.”  
***  
Lydia woke up by the sound of her roommate, talking and giggling girly.  
Girl’s eyes were closed, but she could hear everything perfectly. Not wanting to leave the bed she just hugged the pillow and listened to the conversation Allison was having on the phone.  
“No, they said they don’t know… Yeah yeah, I know, right? Anyway, I thought maybe renting someplace. Or just… What? Wow, that’s…”  
She stopped talking for awhile and Lydia assumed her interlocutor was talking.  
“Are you sure?” Allison said. “Who, me? I like this idea. Lydia won’t on the other hand.” She laughed.  
 _Lydia won’t like what._ Redhead opened her eyes greeting the light from the window and looked straight at Allison.  
“Lydia won’t like what?” She asked out loud.  
Allison raised her eyebrows.  
“She’s awake, I’ll talk to her right now. Bye, Scott.”  
Oh, of course Scott. Lydia rubbed her eyes and yawned. It was a beautiful morning, the sun begged her to go outside. She wrapped the blanket tighter around herself and smiled softly.  
“Okay, so here’s the deal. Okay, idea, if you like.” Allison spoke enthusiastically.  
“About what?”  
“About showering. And…stuff.”  
Girl in the bed grumbled remembering unfortunate boiler situation.  
“Okay. I’m just gonna say it.”  
Lydia narrowed her eyes at her friend.  
“What is it, Ally.”  
Allison took a deep breath, as if she was preparing for Lydia hating the idea. And she probably assumed right, her friend already eyed her suspiciously.  
“We’re staying with Scott and Stiles until it gets fixed!” She spoke quickly, like she wanted to get that out of her system and immediately covered her face in defense, as if Lydia would throw anything to her face.  
“What?! I’m not!” Girl kicked her blanket off and sat straight, suddenly completely awake. It woke her better than any alarm clock. There was no way this was happening.  
“Okay, just hear me out, it’s only for couple of days, probably, and they have hot water babe. Hot. Water.” Allison emphasized last words as a plea.  
Lydia shook her head in order to set her thoughts straight and raised her index finger, preparing for fight.  
“Okay, Allison, no way. We don’t know them, I barely even remember their last names. We literally met them yesterday.”  
“I didn’t.” Her best friend said defensively.  
“Okay, good for you.”  
“Listen, do you trust me? Cause I trust him.”  
“Why? You hardly know him.” Lydia said carefully.  
“Don’t know, I just do. And c’mon where is your need of adventure?” She laughed but shut up quickly at the look of Lydia’s face. Who was not fascinated with the idea. Clearly.  
Just as she was about to say something else, she remembered another thing.  
“Wait, _Scott and Stiles_?!”  
Allison grimaced and murmured.  
“Yeah, I was afraid you might not like that… Okay, listen, he liked you. You’ll get along!” She assured her friend, waving it off, like it was no big deal.  
“Scott and Stiles as in roommates?”  
“As in…yes?” Allison said cautiously. “Before you say anything just think Lydia. We’re grown ups, we’re all eighteen, we’re not stupid. C’mon, just do it for me. And for the sake of your hygiene.” She giggled. “Can you do that?”  
“I wasn’t invited.” Lydia looked for excuse.  
“I’m inviting you. Scott said it’s fine, they have a couch…”  
“And if Stiles is using it?” Lydia grumbled.  
“Then you’ll sleep in his bed.”  
“No way in hell!” Lydia cried.  
Allison got up.  
“Okay, that’s it, stop whining, it’ll be okay. Let’s get our stuff. Love you!”  
And she disappeared in the bathroom, leaving Lydia infuriated mess on her bed. She rolled her eyes for the last time and finally got up.  
“Make sure you pack for a few days, okay? We don’t know how long we’re staying.”  
Lydia didn’t respond anything to that, just nodded. As she was packing her clothes she thought how she could look at all of this. Of course she could bitch about it or she could actually make it fun. At least try.  
But make it fun? Living with Stiles? Not to mention dudes she didn’t know, in general?  
Boy, was that a bad idea.  
About an hour later someone nocked on their door, and Allison jogged to open.  
From the excited noises Lydia could hear it was probably Scott there, picking them up.  
Zipping her last bag she stood up and turned around to say hello, but similarly to the other night, she crashed into a body, her eyes setting on a white shirt.  
“Shit!” She squeaked, taken off guard.  
“Well shit it is, Bambi. We’ve gotta stop meeting like this.” Friendly, yet a little husky voice greeted her and she took a step back looking into those deep hazel eyes.  
“Hey, Stiles.”  
“Hi Bambi.” He actually looked very happy to see her.  
“Hi Scott!” She said leaning to the left, looking over Stiles’ shoulder.  
Stiles didn’t take his eyes off of her, looking down on her. He was smiling teasingly, yet softly. When she turned around to grab her bags, he observed the way she looked.  
Her strawberry blonde hair was now up into a messy bun, and she wore flats, which made her even shorter. She was wearing a light pink romper, which color matched her cheeks and he found it adorable.  
Lydia Martin looked like a candy. Like a sweet, strawberry and caramel candy. She was like a gorgeous little rainstorm, refreshing and yet hot at the same time.  
“I’ll take that.” He put a hand on her smaller back and she froze a little under his touch.  
Stiles smiled to her again and easily lifted her suitcase. Lydia noticed that probably none of the smiles she received from him was genuine or just simply polite. He looked at her like she was a mystery he wanted to solve.  
She noticed he was showered, and without crazy party lighting she could actually take a good look at him.  
He was tall, much taller than her, for sure, and he was all lean. He wasn’t an all-muscle man, but there were stuff to…look at. Lydia had to admit the guy looked amazing in jeans. The ancient denim clung lightly to his hips and followed the long lines of some remarkable thigh muscles. And although she cursed herself for checking out his rear view, her peripheral vision was having a very good day.  
“Wanna take a pic?” He caught her, and leaned in a little. He was still playful but at this close proximity Lydia noticed that his pupils were still dilated, like the other night. Either he was high all the time, or he was just really eager.  
She let out a small breath in his direction.  
His smile vanished as he was startled by her mint breath all over his face. He was amazed and almost angry at the effect this girl had on him. That wasn’t supposed to happen. Stiles waited for her to speak, he didn’t exactly trust his voice at the moment.  
“First of all,” She said. _“Personal space.”_  
He didn’t move he just kept looking at her like a lion would look at gazelle. Except she wasn’t a gazelle. She was this frustratingly cute little ball of temper and big words.  
So she took initiative and stepped back.  
“You just look better with the party and alcohol off of you.”  
He chuckled.  
“Most girls say I look better with all clothes off of me.”  
Lydia raised her eyebrows at him.  
“Okay, I think we can establish that I’m not “Most girls.” Okay? And if we’re gonna be living together, you just have to stop flirting with me.”  
“Why?”  
She looked at him like he had just asked the most idiotic question.  
“Because we’re just roommates. Temporary. So let’s act like it.”   
Stiles laughed at that and just nodded.  
“I talk this way to all my roommates.”  
“That’s true.” Scott answered and both Stiles and Lydia understood that the couple was eavesdropping to their conversation.  
Lydia smirked to Scott and turned to the door.  
“You got everything you need? Keys?” She asked Allison.  
Girl nodded, smiling. She had that look on her face, which told Lydia that they were going to talk about this later.  
Redhead internally screamed at the thought of talking about this boy more than needed.  
Stiles was behind her, waiting for her to move and Lydia turned to face him.  
“Okay. I’ll be nice.” She beamed. “Thank you.”  
“You’re welcome.” He answered just as politely. Then couldn’t help but add. “It’s my pleasure, really.”  
Allison snorted. Without saying any other word the fantastic four moved to the hall.  
“You guys wanna grab a bite?” Scott asked as they were moving downstairs, hand in hand with Allison.  
They all agreed and settled for a pizza place nearby. The group was slowly walking to the car in the parking lot, admiring the sun and the view. Morning California was shining. It was breathtaking.  
“Need any help?” Lydia turned around, when she realized that Stiles was walking a little behind them.  
Stiles stared at her in disbelief.  
“Bambi, I could throw you over my shoulder right now if I wanted to and I could run to Kansas and back. I’m fine.” He chuckled friendly.  
“You really don’t like my name, huh?”  
“What?” That question surprised him.  
“Little one, Bambi?” She pointed out.  
“Oh you mean that!” He smirked and took a few longer strides so now was walking right next to her. “I like your name. I like everything about you Bambi.”  
Her cheeks went soft red at that and he noticed. She bit her lip and Stiles involuntarily swallowed.  
 _Her lips were like two strawberries on top of each other, puffy, pink and puckery. Kissable. Thrilling._  
“That’s because you don’t know me that well.” Girl noted.  
Stiles looked her up and down and laughed, like he had trouble believing what she had just said.  
“You know, I can’t imagine why I wouldn’t like you. Even if I knew you better.”  
“Really?” She crooked an eyebrow at him skeptically. “Huh, I made quite the impression on you, didn’t I?” She added jokingly.  
Scott unlocked the car and Lydia opened the door, while guys were walking around the car to the trunk.  
When the girl was inside, Stiles furrowed his eyebrows and murmured.  
“You have no idea.”  
All the way to the diner, Stiles goggled at Lydia through the driver’s mirror, but he didn’t know if the girl noticed. She and Allison were deep in conversation; they talked, laughed and enjoyed the wind through the open windows.  
“Dude.” Scott said quietly.  
“What?”  
“You’re staring at her like she had just hung the stars.”  
Stiles shoved his best friend to the chest and rolled his eyes.  
“Don’t make me laugh.” He answered in a low voice.  
“She doesn’t want to sleep with you, from what Ally told me.”  
“I know.” Stiles said suddenly maddened.  
“I mean she’s not like your other bimbos.”  
 _“I know.”_ Stiles repeated and clenched his jaw.  
Scott stopped at the crossroad and eyed his friend carefully.  
“Relax man. I’m just pointing out the obvious.” He added a friendly smile at the end of the sentence, not wanting to fight with his friend.  
Stiles seemed to be deep in thought when he leaned in closer and finally said.  
“She doesn’t want to jump on me. And she kinda hates me, like she sees right through me. She gets what a piece of shit I am. And that makes her hundred times more attractive.”  
Front part of the car was quiet until they had reached Pizza Hut. Stiles sighed before getting out of the car and waited for others.  
He subtly looked at Lydia, her cheeks bright pink color, from all the laughing with Allison. Stiles almost smiled to himself and opened the door for her.  
“Ladies first.”  
The group ordered pizzas and when Scott and Allison started their deep discussion, Stiles put his elbows on the table, and leaned his cheek on his fists.  
“So, what’s your major, Bambi?”  
Lydia internally smiled at the opportunity to talk to him like a normal human being and mirrored his position.  
“Astrophysics. And you?”  
His eyes widened and he gawked at her.  
“Wow. A woman in physics. I like physics.”  
“And you like women, Stiles.” Lydia said.  
He chortled.  
“Damn right I do. And what about you, do you have this temper with all the guys?”  
“No, it’s just you.”  
“Right.” He said sarcastically and that tone intrigued Lydia. As well as annoyed, but pretty much everything about this boy annoyed her. “Is this the plot where you, pretending to hate me is a defense mechanism?”   
Girl didn’t even smile.  
“There’s no plot, I just don’t like you.”  
He didn’t waste half a second answering to her.  
“You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t like me.”  
This time she cracked a smile.  
“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” She murmured, purposely shifting closer to him.  
Stiles grunted.  
“How..” he started slowly, picking his words. “How do you manage to look like a kitty, and still be this cranky?”  
Redhead pursed her lips, covering her quickened breath.  
“Again, it has to be you, Stiles. I’m usually much more polite.” Noticing that he didn’t say anything in response, she talked again. “I was kinda raised this way. I have to be polite in my job, my school, activities, with people. Of course there’s a limit, and there are also jackasses like you, but nonetheless I am a polite person.”  
He wrinkled his forehead in thought. Smug left his face and he asked her seriously.  
“Why do you have to be so polite? There’s nothing interesting in that.”  
Lydia looked at him, confused.  
“It’s politeness, how interesting can it get?”  
He smiled to himself and then looked at her again, shifting his whole body in her direction.  
“Not what I meant, Bambi. You shouldn’t be this polite.” Once again he invaded her personal space by getting closer to her, so that his leg was brushing against hers. “Politeness is okay, but it gets old and boring. You want to attack life with a passion, not a politeness, you want people to think about you and say “she is so passionate” you don’t want people to remember you and say “she is so polite”, because who cares about polite? You’re a damn fire yourself, Bambi, be _passionate_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave comments! :) Thank you for reading and enjoy.


	3. Caramel

Later at the diner Stiles and Lydia didn’t really talk much.  
They ate her pizzas in silence, deep in thought. Allison eyed her friend, mild worry on her face, furrowing her eyebrows in silent question if everything was okay.  
Lydia wasn’t sure what flustered her so much. It wasn’t really a big deal what Stiles had said. _Be passionate. ___For some reason that shut her up, she didn’t even want to bicker with him. They know each other for exactly two days now, who the hell says these things during a first normal conversation?  
_You want to attack your life. ___  
Lydia suddenly felt naked, exposed, and involuntarily frowned. He wasn’t supposed to read her that well; they had absolutely nothing in common. Unless he was some freaky mind reader, which, she was sure he wasn’t, he had no business commenting her personality or life choices this way.  
The guy was absolutely right though, and that made her nervous.  
While she was reckoning and playing with her pizza, more than actually eating it, she didn’t even notice Stiles’ hazel eyes fixed on her.  
He delicately watched her pout her cute lips, staring at the plate in front of her, and Stiles couldn’t help but think if it was something he said. He couldn’t actually figure out this girl. She made him excited, eager, _thirsty_. She was probably the first girl who was disgusted with him _before ___having sex with him. She didn’t try to get his attention and when he was in the playing mood, he sort of liked hard to get, but Lydia had something else going on.  
Not even hiding anymore he really looked at her. How the hell did she manage to get under his skin like this? To make him simply drool over her? She was H-O-T-T. Stiles never understood why people insisted on adding another T at the end. Until now. She was worth the extra T. He couldn't stop staring at her mouth when she was simply sitting next to him, doing nothing. Stiles betted she knew how to kiss, really. Perfect kisses, ones that weren't wet and gross, but the kind that curled toes.  
His insides growled, he needed to stop looking at her in general.  
She was literally everything to make him hungry... Beautiful face. Beautiful body. Horrible attitude. Towards him, mostly… She had a holy trinity working him up real good.  
For some reason he associated this girl with caramel…  
His keen thoughts about Lydia and candies were interrupted by a gentle touch on his shoulder. When he ripped his eyes off of her, first thing he really saw was a very familiar body. Body he knew all too well. From every side, every point and part of it.  
“Malia,” He welcomed the tall girl in front of him.  
“Hey.” She answered flirty and whole table looked at her.  
She was tall, her stance was model-like, short brown hair, revealing her sharp features and she was looking at Stiles hardily, mischievous smile on her face, before finally detecting the whole table.  
Malia was already familiar to Scott and she nodded to him, warily looking at the new girls. She immediately decided that brunette was not worth her interest, as soon as she noticed Scott’s arm wrapped protectively around her.  
The redhead, though, sitting close to Stiles, watched her with mirroring expression, calm and cautious. She didn’t look like other Stiles’ one night stands, not by her looks, she was attractive, but she wasn’t trying to touch him, get close to him and her body language wasn’t vulgar.  
“What are you doing here?” Stiles asked.  
Lydia noticed that he somewhat embarrassingly looked at Scott, then right back at her. It was for 0,5 seconds, but it was enough for Lydia to question the fact that the boy was even capable of feeling embarrassed.  
“I’m having dinner with my brother. And I saw you guys. By now I’ve seen your messy hair in such close proximity; I could notice you from afar.” Malia played and Lydia shot her eyebrows up at the obvious line.  
_Ew. ___  
She and Allison exchanged looks and Allison narrowed her eyes at her best friend.  
Slightly rolling her eyes Lydia looked back at the leggy girl by their table.  
Stiles didn’t seem very affectionate by girl’s flirting. Lydia thought that it was probably because he was used to it. He actually stayed calm and nodded.  
“Cool.” He responded nonchalantly.  
Malia was a little taken aback by his cold behavior and looked possessively at him, but Stiles didn’t break the contact.  
“Wanna say hello to Jackson?” She said in a way that sounded like a private joke.  
She probably triggered something, because Stiles tensed clenched his jaw, his eyes suddenly guarded. Lydia noticed how his whole body went hard, sending angry signals. She could see his biceps tighten and he licked his lips furiously.  
“Yeah, as long as I remember I still owe him a black eye. Another one probably feels a little lonely.”  
Scott snorted at that but Lydia kept her eyes on Stiles.  
There was something really bothering him and he started shaking his leg slightly, mad expression covering his face, completely not suiting his deep chocolate eyes and soft features.  
Whoa. _She was still sitting very close to him._  
With every brush she felt on her leg, it was also electricity going all the way up to her body. Lydia swallowed and pretended to stay completely calm to the fact that these small movements sent goose bumps to her body. Lydia didn’t move, pretending that she didn’t even notice his leg bumping at her own.  
Since her romper was short, she felt soft fabric of his jeans teasing every nerve in her body and what started down on her legs, it sent eager signal to her whole body. She also felt his calf muscles through the jeans and now it felt like he unwillingly provoked her.  
It got a little harder trying to remain cool.  
_So, this was probably angry Stiles._  
She wasn’t sure how she managed to see him angry already, in this little time of knowing, but as much as she tried to deny it, irritated Stiles was hot.  
There was something about his eyes, the way they darkened like it drew all bad things in the world. The man was a stud, and he kinda took the old cliché “Tall, dark and handsome” and made it his little bitch.  
Catching herself eating him with her eyes, and not for the first time, Lydia shook her head a little and cursed. No matter how attractive he was, she still didn’t like him.  
“Fine.” Malia spoke, annoyed by the lack of attention from the guy. She shot one more look towards Lydia but before walking away, she stopped.  
Malia turned around and seductively leaned down, her face close to his and he watched her steadily.  
As uncomfortable as it was to look, all four of them examined her actions and was she was about to do. She slowly shifted her neck to the right, revealing something that only Stiles would see from that angle. It was like watching a snake, sliding her way to the victim. And she was definitely a toxic one.  
Still close to him, she intentionally murmured a little louder than only for his hearing.  
“Go easy next time.”  
Lydia, Allison and Scott shifted awkwardly and looked away from the girl, who was walking away with confidence.  
Stiles though, didn’t seem so affected by her. He watched her go away and didn’t say anything in response.  
Lydia just looked in front of her, wondering if her disgust was obvious. It didn’t really bother her, it just was bluntly repulsive. When she raised her eyes from the pizza, she caught Allison’s look, brunette was also quiet, with one of her eyebrows creased as if she had just witnessed some ugly sex act.  
Scott seemed the only not that affected by it. Guy was calm, his face said “Oh well” and he returned to eating his pizza. Everything was normal. She sensed that their apartment was a revolving door for clueless bimbos like Malia.  
Then Stiles peeked at Lydia, looking a little self-conscious. And looking self-conscious was not an act he could pull off. She finally answered his look but didn’t comment on what just happened and sat straighter to eat her pizza.  
Holly awkward.  
“What?” Stiles asked Lydia provocatively. _So it was obvious._

She shrugged.  
“Not much. Who was your friend?”  
He smiled and stretched.  
“You said it yourself, Bambi. My friend.” He answered casually. “What about it?” He tested and Lydia understood he was provoking her into the conversation.  
She was about to say something but decided to hold back and rolled her eyes again.  
Stiles giggled, happy with the way he annoyed her.  
“Do you have an eye twitch?” That question took her by surprise.  
“What?” She grumbled staring into his eyes, a little lost in them.  
“You keep rolling your eyes.” Stiles noted lightly.  
She smiled at him, nowhere near genuinely and answered with sarcastic tone.  
“Yeah Stiles, you are the twitch.”  
She heard him choke a little by his growing laughter and Allison with Scott joined him.  
“Come on, babe.” Allison stood up still snickering and offered her hand to her best friend. “Let’s go order some ice cream.”  
Lydia leered at her and also stood up. Stiles sat still looking up on her, with that sweet sweet smile curved on his lips, leaning his chin on his one hand, another on the counter, blocking the way and Lydia thought what he was thinking now.  
Guy not so subtly dropped his gaze and observed her whole body from her pursed lips he found very tempting, to her sexy long legs. She had an adorable stance, she was extremely short and little, still, the girl obviously tried to send him furious signals with all of her body.  
That made Stiles smile even more. She was like a mad, pink ball of fluff. Her act didn’t make him scared at all. It made him desirous.  
“You mind letting me go?” She finally asked politely.  
His eyes got more mischievous.  
“Come on, Lydia, you can definitely just walk past me. There’s no need for me to get up, is there?”  
“For fuck’s sake dude, just let her through.” Scott interrupted and even without looking at him Lydia could hear smile in his voice.  
Stiles sighed and stood up, letting her pass. He stood close to the entrance and he clearly not moving from that position. She carefully slid past him, trying not to touch him. The harder she tried, the more she wanted to. Willingly or not, her chest touched his and both of their breaths hitched. She stopped for just a second to look up at him and she realized how dangerously close he was now.  
Stiles was staring at her lips and she focused more on his eyes. The more she looked at him, the dizzier she got.  
Allison pulled on her hand gently, interrupting their quiet conversation. Stiles took a step back and still holding his breath, he let the girl through.  
“What ice cream do you want?” She asked evenly.  
 _Caramel. Strawberry. You, on my bed…!!!_  
“Caramel, Bambi.”  
Lydia nodded at him and walked away, knowing for sure that he is still looking at her. It took all she got not to peek back at him.  
When they reached the menu table and ordered ice cream, Allison turned to her, her eyebrows high, grin on her face.  
“What?” Lydia muttered pretending that she didn’t know what her friend’s look told.  
Allison shook her head and winked at Lydia. She kept her look straight, not looking at Ally, knowing that she would probably smile if she met her gaze.  
“Stop it Allison.” She almost broke into a smile.  
“I’m not doing anything.” She told defensively. “You’re the one eye-fucking.”  
Lydia’s mouth fell wide open. She wrinkled her forehead.  
“Jesus Christ, what’s wrong with you? The guy is a pig, okay?”  
Allison sighed.  
“Yeah, a pig you want on top of you…” She murmured loud enough for her to hear it.  
Lydia turned to her friend with her whole body and made her most serious look she could manage.  
“Allison.”  
 _“Lydia.”_ She mirrored her sarcastically.  
“Stop saying these things. Stiles seriously gets on my nerves,” she looked at the table for a second. “He is a fuck machine, from what I’ve seen okay? At the very best, maybe I would consider being friends with him. That’s all there is.” Lydia finished unconvincingly.  
Allison just rolled her eyes but decided to drop it. At least for now.  
Eating ice cream was the least tense day part of the day. They all laughed and joked, everybody enjoying their deserts and each other‘s company. _No one tried to flirt and make one another uncomfortable or frustrated._  
Scott subtly leaned in to whisper something to Allison and Lydia smiled softly, politely turning her eyes away from them. Stiles caught her look but only for a second, before loudly shrieking.  
“YO SCOTT WHATCHA WHISPERING TO HER? AND RIGHT INTO THE EAR MAN NICE. ARE YOU PROMISING HER UNFORGETABLE NIGHT AT MCCALL’S LOVE MACHINE?!”  
Whole diner turned over from their seats to look at their now idiotically looking table.  
Lydia almost chocked on her ice cream as she laughed with her whole body.  
“Jesus Christ Stiles!” She snorted and started laughing even more at the look on Scott’s face.  
When she was laughing so hard that she threw her head back, Stiles smirked at her looking giddy, that it was him who made her feel this way.  
Allison didn’t look so embarrassed, at least compared to Scott. His ears were a little red from so many eyes on him and he just looked at the table, slightly shaking his head.  
“I’m gonna kill you in your sleep Stilinski.”  
Lydia and Allison giggled and Stiles shrugged, unaffected.  
“Well I’m sorry, I just assumed.”  
“Yeah,” Allison chuckled. “And when you’re asleep tonight, I will just assume that you’re dead and bury you in the back yard.”  
Stiles eyed her, pretending to be intimidated.  
“She’s a fighter, Scott. Don’t let her get away.” Stiles nodded as if giving them their blessing.  
“Well they’re already living together, so by the next month you’ll probably receive a wedding invitation.” Lydia winked catching up to Stiles’ way of teasing the couple.  
“And where does that leave us, Bambi? Aren’t we also living together?” He questioned playfully.  
Lydia pouted, this time friendly and girly.  
“I’m pretty sure I was forced to live with you.”  
“Ugh. Excuses.” Stiles grunted.  
They didn’t banter anymore and decided to go home. Lydia bit her lip. The thought of having to call the guys’ apartment her home for God knows what time, startled her a little.  
“What’s worrying you Bambi?” Stiles coughed up to her on their way back to the car.  
“Just thinking about this excruciating time of living with you.”  
“So you’re thinking about me, huh?” He tucked a hair behind her ear carelessly and then immediately froze.  
What the fuck was that. He freaking clung to her like spider to a web.  
“That’s what you got out of that sentence?” Lydia laughed and Stiles held out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, relieved that girl decided to shrug off what just happened.  
“I’ll take the best I can get, Lydia.” He smirked and opened the car’s door or her.

 


	4. Boundaries

Sorry for the late update! :) This one is little longer.

Rode back home was somewhat quieter. Somehow Stiles seemed to manage leaving her constantly overthinking things. He was like a hurricane, leaving her torn, stunned and eager. Lydia avoided his eyes now that just decided to sit next to her in the back. Allison didn’t mind sitting next to Scott, softly gripping his hand, with his other on the wheel.  
Lydia smiled, looking at their intertwined fingers.  
“What?” She asked, still looking forward, feeling whiskey eyes focused on her.  
“Oh, nothing Bambi.” She could hear smile in his voice. “I’m just thinking, what the hell is going on in that little head of yours.”  
Lydia snorted, though it didn’t really amuse her. She looked at him and he greeted her with one of those devastatingly intoxicating smiles that did unreasonable things to her body and respiration.  
She shifted on her seat, facing him a little more, and he suddenly felt hot. He thought he should probably get used to the way she makes him flustered. Looking in those wide green eyes, he wondered if she felt the same.  
“Why?” She asked with a sigh.  
Stiles shrugged. Knowing absolutely well what he was doing, he gripped her chin, softly, just for a second, and immediately let go, but it was enough for her to part her lips and Stiles focused on them again.  
_There were secrets in her lips… He wanted them out._  
“Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark.” He winked.  
She hummed in annoyance, not trusting her voice enough to answer sarcastic comeback, which was on the tip of her tongue. Her eyes involuntarily slid down to his right hand fingers, the same ones that just now assaulted her face, teasing nerves in her body. Little beast in side of her purred, asking her to stop thinking and caring. Asking her to reach out to him, feel the same fingers on her face again, her thighs, body. Perfect fingers to tangle in her curls…  
_Boundaries, Lydia._  
She took a small breath.  
“Speaking of boundaries, we should probably make some… ground rules. Okay?”  
He chuckled at that.  
“Rules? What are we, kids? I can control myself if you can.”  
Lydia’s eyes widened. She looked so shocked and frustrated that Stiles’ mischievous smile enlarged even more, enjoying her facial expression.  
Scott opened the window, carelessly talking to Allison, and wind rushed through Lydia’s and Stiles’ bodies. Her perfume reached his nostrils and she smelled like divinity and lust.  
Lydia brushed her hair out of her face, and Stiles couldn’t help but wonder what they would look like twisted between his fingers, holding her closer than possible.  
By now, he was pretty sure Lydia was some sort of sex goddess. He had never been so attracted to another person, so instantly. He sure as hell didn’t believe in love at first sight, but thundering sexual attraction at first sight… that was a hard fact. This guy knew it damn well.  
“Oh, you can control yourself?” She pouted adorably. “For the love of God…” She cracked her neck in annoyance.  
“I make you frustrated, Bambi.” He said that almost proudly, smirking.  
She smiled at him and his eyes lit up even more.  
“No, Stiles. You make me mad, okay? And I was serious before, no more flirting, deal?”  
Stiles shifted closer to her on the seat in about 0.5 seconds and Lydia startled, realizing there was nowhere else to go. His fingers delicately moved towards her leg while gripping the seat corner, but she tried to remain still. Her breathing, though, couldn’t.  
“Now…” He said in a low husky voice. “If you are so good at controlling yourself, what’s the harm in flirting?”  
Lydia put her small hand on his chest and tried to push him away but he didn’t move, like some kind of brick wall. She could feel his heartbeat though, it was rushing and she couldn’t help but think it was her who was toying with it.  
She looked at him from under her lashes.  
“It’s making me uncomfortable.” She admitted.  
He puffed a bubble of air right to her eyes and she blinked a few times. For a second there, he almost seemed apologetically, but then his smug came right back on.  
Right when he was opening his dirty mouth to respond, she blurted out.  
“Do you really think that good about yourself?”  
His smile vanished and he raised an eyebrow at her. Did she even have to ask him this question?  
I guess his face was speaking for him, because she just murmured.  
“Of course you do…”  
The lines were somehow getting blurry and it was her own fault. She closed her eyes and took the crown of her nose with two small fingers.  
“Okay, Stiles. Seriously. We’re just friends, or since… just… roommates, right?”  
He nodded.  
“You’re not sleeping with me, I get it.” He somehow got that out, although every part of his body wanted to deny this crazy thought. Even here, on the back of moving vechile.  
“Great. So you can drop this smug, the no-standards fuck boy act with me, and speak…”  
“What??” He shrieked, causing Allison and Scott to look back at their companions.  
This was pretty much what they saw. Stiles was commandingly close to Lydia, trapping her, between himself and the doors, his face confused and shocked, facing Lydia, who looked lost and irritated. This was an interesting sight. Scott narrowed his eyes at them both, then more on Stiles.  
He had seen lot of versions of him. In any kinds of situations. But never quite like that. He could smell the tension from hear and their banter was all up in the air. This girl was different. Stiles had never acted so savagely around any girl he liked or wanted to sleep with.  
_There was something very wrong, or very right…_  
“I swear to God, if you’re groping my best friend in the back of a car…”  
“Allison!” Scott and Lydia squealed in unison.  
“Do you really think I have no standards? In who I sleep with?” Stiles demanded, not caring about couple in front of them, his hazel eyes buried deep in her green ones.  
Lydia tried pushing him away again and this time he gave in, obviously still waiting for an answer.  
“I don’t know, okay? I don’t know you, I just know that you met me at the line to a freaking bathroom and you hit on me almost immediately. I don’t know what this tells me about you. It shouldn’t be telling me anything, because quite frankly I don’t care!” She finished upset.  
Stiles leaned back a little, as if he was trying to get a closer look at her, while she was trying to get a closer look at him.  
Oh, he did look like a deity – the perfect balance of danger and charm, he was at the same time fascinating and inaccessible, distant because of his demonstrated flawlessness, and possessing such strength of character that he was dismaying and at the same time utterly attractive in an enticing and forbidden way.  
This perfect sin in front of her licked his lips and beamed.  
“You should care. Don’t forget that you will be the one sleeping by my side now.”  
***  
“I won’t do it Allison!” Lydia stamped her feet on the ground when guys were finally in.  
Her friend cupped her shoulders and motioned her to breathe with one hand.  
“Come on, relax.”  
“He’s awful!” Lydia yelled.  
“Okay, stop…”  
“No, I seriously… Mister Golden boy. I… We are gonna tear each other apart.” She said as-a-matter-of-factly, nodding nervously.  
Allison laughed and let go of her shoulders, turning around.  
“Why does he bother you so much?” She asked curiously, taking her back from the trunk.  
Lydia sighed. She didn’t even know why he bothered her that much. He just did. He made her irritated and angry and a bunch of other things that were anything but friendly.  
Which kind of worked both ways.  
“Bambi!” She heard from behind and rolled her eyes.  
Scott and Stiles were happily jogging to the car and Lydia smiled at that. Stiles walked to her quickly and winked.  
“What could this ball of rage possibly smile about?”  
Lydia laughed at his comparison.  
“You, can you believe it?”  
Stiles pretended to think, biting his lip.  
“Well, it certainly tells me you’re a girl. A minute ago you were mad.” He noted cheerfully.  
“Oh, you still annoy me, don’t worry. And I though you’ve already established that I’m a girl.” She added, knowing herself that she is stepping into a dangerous territory with him.  
She still couldn’t help it.  
“Oh, believe me.” He hissed seductively, looking her up and down. She blushed softly and he grinned at that.  
Stiles made girls scream, made girls pant and moan, but dear… Never had he made a girl blush. These little details, that Lydia did. That’s why he was so drawn to her. Or was it just everything in her?  
“You know you’re quite dangerous, Little One?”  
Lydia giggled.  
“How am I dangerous? I though you just said I was small.”  
He shook his head, not commenting any further and stepped to the right, to make her way to go to the apartment. Still a little confused she started walking.  
“Did you just let her through so you could stare at her ass?” Scott asked abruptly.  
Stiles answered without hesitation.  
“I’m checking her out in every way I find possible. That doesn’t require for me to let her through, I’m simply being a gentleman.”  
Nobody said any word after that but that was mostly because everyone was probably waiting for a comeback from Lydia, who was smiling down to him.  
Surprising everybody else and herself she didn’t say anything, she just shot Stiles playful look and went forward.  
The stairs to the door seemed somehow familiar, but she couldn’t understand how. Just as she was about to enter their apartment Lydia squeaked, not feeling the ground anymore.  
Stiles easily swept her off of her feet and without anyone being able to comprehend what was happening, he scooped her up in bridal way and carried her in through their door.  
“What the hell?!” She yelled, clinging to him, her hands instinctively finding their way around his neck.  
Once they were in, he gently let her down, but still kept his hand around her waist, and Lydia noticed how… warm he was. Hotness radiated from his body and he looked down at her, laughing.  
He had no idea what came on to him. But he really wanted to do that, not really caring about the consequences. Lydia was so small, barely reaching his shoulder and she looked at him questioningly, those beautiful green eyes confused and lost, but sparkly. His hand was still wrapped around her waist and she fit perfectly to his body. The brainless wonder in his pants certainly appreciated her nearness. That stupid bastard started pounding against his zipper like a convict pounding against bars of his cell.  
_Boundaries, Stiles._  
Allison and Scott caught up to them. Allison was smiling, she looked almost amused and even though cute little smile on Scott’s face was evident, he looked at this situation with curious look.  
Stiles raised his eyebrows, when no one said anything, like they needed explanation for what just happen.  
Allison’s smirk even widened, when she noticed Stiles’ hand around Lydia. She wanted to wink at her friend, but Lydia was looking only at Stiles.  
“Oh, c’mon, it’s a tradition!” He laughed, making Lydia chuckle at his excuse.  
“What tradition?” She asked, still watching him, her nose being tickled by the slight sense of his cologne.  
“When… you know. You know! Like, when you move into a new house…” He stuttered and looked at Scott for help, but his friend traitorously looked at him pleased that there was no going out of this situation.  
So Stiles just gave up at that note.  
“Oh, fuck. Okay, never mind.” He said, still not letting go of Lydia.  
She decided it was about time for her to claim her personal space. This was a dangerous territory. _Dangerous._ She narrowed her eyes slightly, remembering he had just called her that. In no possible way was she dangerous. This boy, with his hand around her, and his stance demanding, now this was dangerous. And disturbing. He disturbed her. And she didn’t like things that disturbed her; unfortunately, sexual attraction was not considered a valid reason to dislike someone.  
Lydia slid away from him, his eyes immediately losing focus, unhappy with the loss of contact.  
It was only now that she had a good look around the apartment. Oh! That’s how she remembered this was familiar. It was the place from the other night. Here the freshman party took place, here she met Scott and Stiles. Without so many people and the lights and fumes, it was a really nice place. To her left she saw stairs to the second floor, and not seeing her things anywhere around in the first floor, she decided that girls would probably live there.  
“Okay, Bambi, let me show you my room.” Stiles said lightly, catching everyone’s attention.  
Lydia eyed him curiously.  
_“Why?”_  
“Because you’re sleeping there.” It seemed like the most obvious thing he had ever said.  
“No, I’m not. It’s your room.”  
He groaned and somehow laughed at the same time.  
“Ugh, no, Bambi, you’re sleeping in my bed.”  
“Why?” She shrieked and he was becoming irritated.  
“Well where else would you be sleeping?” He clenched his jaw.  
“Okay, anywhere, how about the couch?” She asked.  
Stiles exchanged looks with Scott, and coughed, explaining the situation without any embarrassment.  
“I have sex on the couch. So, if you’re planning on sleeping with me, fine, suit yourself, but if you want to keep pretending that you don’t want to, I suggest sleeping in my bed.” He shrugged.  
She ignored his true accusation and grumbled.  
“Which is even more unsanitary than the couch, I’m sure…”  
Stiles shook his head.  
“I never let anyone sleep there.”  
“Oh, give me a break.” She rolled her eyes at him.  
“No, I don’t.” He pouted his lips and she bit her own.  
“Then why me?”  
He sighed, looking at her, making sure she understands how much she annoys him.  
“Because, Bambi, as I recall, you don’t want to drop your panties for me, huh?” He stepped closer, expecting for her to break, but she stood her ground.  
“Never in a life time, believe me. No matter how much you wanted to.” She murmured harshly.  
He laughed at that and took one little step toward. Allison and Scott were already in the living room, leaving two tigers alone with their thirst, anger and chemistry.  
“Honey, if I wanted to, I could just throw over my shoulder now and you wouldn’t be able to say no.” Stiles muttered his voice deep and gravelly.  
She patted his chest lightly.  
“And that’s the most repulsive thing about you. Honey.” Lydia sounded like a shot of caffeine that ignited his body. How does she do that?  
With that, she left him standing in the hallway, frustrated by her smart mouth, every hormone and nerve teased.  
“Fuck…” He whispered.  
***  
After taking a shower, one by one, Lydia and Allison went downstairs, where they found guys in the kitchen, chatting and laughing. Their house have seen lots of things, parties, drunk girls, drunk guys, stoned people, angry neighbors, but it haven’t seen two cute girls with wet hair and sweats.  
Stiles looked at Lydia, observing her messy hair falling down on her shoulders, complimenting her blue crop top and he couldn’t help but think that orange and blue was the most perfect combination.  
“What are doing tonight?” He asked, clapping his hands once.  
Scott shrugged.  
“You wanna go out?” He asked the girls.  
Allison shrugged, looking at Lydia.  
“Sure, if Lydia is up for it.”  
“Come on, Bambi!” Stiles stood up from where he was sitting and walked over to her, tickling her ribcages softly. Due to her short top his fingers found her smooth skin on her waist and she almost squealed. His warm fingers lingered on her slightly damp skin a second longer but she decided that right now she couldn’t handle looking at him and his smug smile.  
“Sure.” She beamed. “Where are we going?”  
“There’s this party on the beach.” Scott suggested. “Isaac will probably be there, and he said there are fireworks afterwards.”  
“Sounds fun.” Allison nodded in enthusiasm. “Lydia?” She made a face she knew Lydia wouldn’t say no to.  
“I’m in, I’m in.” Lydia assured her. “When’s the party?” She turned to Scott.  
“I’m not sure. But I know it’s gonna be evening. So you know… wear something warm.”  
Stiles snorted. His first response would have been that Lydia didn’t even have to wear anything, she would probably still be warm and soft as melted caramel. Yeah, he was back to that, referring to this girl as caramel. He couldn’t help it, she was. Eyeing her with these domestic clothes that didn’t reveal much of her skin, made him think what she would look like without them.  
_On top of him._  
_Under him._  
_Her. ___  
_Him._  
“What?” Lydia interrupted his thoughts.  
Stiles shook his head. She had some kind of control over him. She made Stiles dizzy, and it annoyed him. He wanted to fight with her but wanted her to want him.  
He wanted her to melt into him, like butter on toast. He wanted to absorb her and walk around for the rest his day with her encased in his skin.  
He wanted. And she was responsible for that. She wanted him to stop flirting, but she was the one pulling all the strings.  
“Come on, let’s just get ready, okay?” He said.  
Lydia looked at him carefully, seeing his amaze, or whatever this was. Her eyes darted over the surface of his face. Like a moth to a blaze she was hesitant, seeming to crave his warmth but not its inevitable burn. Lydia explored Stiles from a distance with her unspoken desire, with the fear that touching him would set her to flame.  
She wanted nothing more in that moment than to prove to herself very much the opposite.  
For the love of God.  
_Control your thoughts._  
Allison called her to come upstairs help her choose her outfit and Lydia was happy to get away from this boy who made her flustered by even looking at her.  
Bastard. He had no right.  
Lydia shut the door to what was probably Scott’s room, a big one, with Allison’s suitcases in the corner and as soon as she let go of the door handle, Allison looked at her with her big eyes, half smiling.  
“Oh my God. It’s uncomfortable being around you two.”  
“Oh my- If you’re gonna be talking about this again, I’m leaving.” Lydia threatened.  
“No no! I really need your help.”  
Lydia nodded and sat on Scott’s bed, as Allison started pulling one dress after the other, making a colorful pile on the floor, and with a sigh she opened another suitcase.  
“You could cut the sexual tension with a knife…” She murmured, as if she was talking to herself.  
Lydia didn’t answer, just rolled her eyes and kept watching her friend.  
When Allison finally found pants she wanted to wear, Lydia left the room to get dressed herself. It was very warm outside, even in the evening.  
She easily settled for light floral shorts and white top. Her now dry hair was tangled in soft waves and she put her red lipstick on. Liking what she saw in the mirror she sprayed on her perfume and went downstairs.  
Allison and Scott sat on the couch, hugging, the same one where Lydia met him, but now all she could think about if it was the couch all Stiles’ girls spread eagle on.  
“Nice girl!” Allison said excitedly.  
“Nice choice, Lydia.” Scott nodded and smiled. “Stiles is gonna piss himself when he sees you.”  
“Oh c’mon, not you too.” Lydia laughed.  
At those words Stiles stumbled into the living room and Lydia nodded, approving his white shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbows, and he was wearing light jeans.  
He observed her choice of clothing, whistling at her teasingly short shorts. Her petite figure looked even tastier now and he unconsciously leaned at the door, still looking at her and it made her feel a bit awkward.  
“So when Stiles is done drooling over Lydia, we can go?” Scott suggested nonchalantly, making Allison laugh.  
Stiles fake laughed at his friend but turned to the door. Everyone followed.  
Beach was super beautiful, sun wasn’t shining so bright anymore, and some people were making a huge fire in the distance. All four of them slipped out of their shoes, feeling cold, refreshing sand go through their toes.  
“Scott! Guys!” They heard the voice from the distance and found Isaac in the crowd.  
The party was way calmer than they could’ve imagined. There were people playing acoustics and mainly just chilling. Lydia inhaled smell of the water and smiled.  
“Hey!” Isaac got to them and shook his hands with the guys, giving Allison and Lydia quick hug.  
Stiles was somehow by her side again and he told her quietly.  
“Wanna take a walk?”  
Lydia nodded. They subtly stepped away from their friends and started walking towards the ocean.  
“Are you chilly?” He asked.  
No, but you can still put your arm around me.  
Waving that thought away she shrugged as casually as she could.  
“No, I’m okay.”  
Stiles stared at her for a second and after weighing the possibility of being punched or yelled at, he shrug off his hoodie and covered her shoulders.  
Corners of her mouths turned up and he pretended not to notice it.  
“So, what’s your story?” She asked, realizing how cliché that sounded.  
He shoved his hands to his pockets, eyes becoming wary. They kept walking in slow steps.  
“You think there’s so much to tell?” He grinned.  
Her words fell with the weight of conviction, simple truth.  
“A guy like you usually does have a story. Tell me about your family.” She suggested and he looked at her. Sun was playing on her face and it suited perfectly with the color of her hair and lips. Lips that absolutely corrupted his imagination and inflamed his blood.  
“My dad is around.” He finally said. “And I’m living with my brother.” He laughed, looking forward now. “There’s not much to tell, really. My dad is the county Sheriff, and he is, hands down the best man I’ve ever known.”  
“And your mom?” She asked carefully but he couldn’t hear fear of the answer in her voice.  
“Last time I saw her, I was nine. That was last time anyone had seen her.” He answered calmly, as a matter-of-fact.  
His answer caught her off guard.  
“I’m sorry.”  
He quickly dismissed her sympathy.  
“Don’t worry about it, it was a long time ago.” He sent assuring smile in her direction and she figured that he was actually okay.  
They kept walking, talking and bantering from time to time. It was almost impossible for them to speak normally. He made her laugh a few times, making him think that maybe she doesn’t hate him at all. He made her nervous. That was different. And it was even better.  
When fireworks finally came on, it was already darkened and the only light was a huge fire nearby, along with the fireworks. They found Allison, Scott and Isaac and watched at the dark sky. People were cheering and laughing everywhere, and when they started firing bigger fireworks, Lydia noted Scott whispering something to Allison and kissing her sweetly. Stiles, still by her side, she noticed was also watching them, but he had another facial expression. His one eyebrow was raised and he had his little scheme face on, so Lydia punched him in the arm.  
“What it is, Bambi?”  
“It’s romantic. No need for your snarky comments.” She pointed out.  
Stiles giggled.  
“It’s romantic? It’s cliché. Why doesn’t he just kiss her at midnight, under the stars, in the moonlight..?” He kept mocking.  
Lydia shook her head in amaze.  
“You must have some romantic bone in your body?” She suggested.  
He laughed, his eyes on hers.  
“Don’t mistake romance for lust.” He murmured.  
She wasn’t aware of just how close he had moved to her until now. So many details came in focus. The shape of his lips, the line of his neck. She thought she heard him whisper “Fuck boundaries.” and he wrapped one of his hands to her waist, just as in the afternoon.  
It sent flurry sparks through her.  
“You said today I was dangerous. I’m not dangerous.” She breathed.  
Stiles brought his face toward hers.  
“You are to me.”  
They were one toe in the water of intimacy, from which they would never recover, they just didn’t know it yet.  
_“Lydia?! Is that you? Oh my God!!!”_


	5. Something I need

I love you all!

Only after about two seconds Lydia ripped her eyes off Stiles. She stepped back without a word and his hand naturally fell down from her waist. She avoided his eyes snapping out of his space. 

Lydia finally turned to see who was calling her. Her friends looked at this person too and Allison raised her eyebrows.  
Tall, muscular guy got a little closer to Lydia, in fact he moved with lithe grace and she parted her lips in shock. In front of her was a man she certainly did not expect to see here. He smiled friendly at her and she awkwardly waved at him. Allison didn’t say anything, because she looked quite speechless and Scott stayed neutral.  
Stiles lifted his eyebrows a little, standing behind Lydia.  
“Oh my God…” Lydia murmured.  
When he finally came close enough for the group to actually see his face, Stiles noted that he was a little older. At least 3 years. He had a friendly smile on his face, but he looked just as surprised as Lydia.  
The man ran his finger through his brown hair in a habit and after debating what to say, finally spoke.  
“Hi…”  
His eyes were expecting. Hopeful. Longing.  
Stiles looked him up and down, feeling irritation growing, but even more, he was curious. Lydia still didn’t say anything; she just eyed the guy in front of her. Her eyes were not focusing what was happening, in awe, or disbelief, he couldn’t quite tell.  
He angled his head to look at her face, to check on her, and she had the most beautiful of surprised expressions he had ever seen. Her cute, full, pink lips were split and Stiles figured it was not the best moment for him to start fantasizing about them.  
He sighed, when they finally moved.  
“How.. Why? How come you’re here?” Lydia’s voice broke, she closed her eyes for a brief second. She managed to put a small smile on her face, but immediately bit her lip, failing, not handling the fake happiness. She wrapped her arms around herself protectively and her fingers got lost in long sleeves of Stiles’ hoodie.  
Guy’s mien mirrored hers. His eyebrows pulled in.  
“I’m… Kinda back.”  
Lydia giggled humorlessly.  
“Yeah, I see that. How?” She emphasized.  
He shrugged, looking at her intensely. Lydia shivered but it wasn’t from the cold.  
Noticing that, Stiles strained himself from reaching out to her, no matter how much he wanted to. He didn’t like the way she tightened around this dude, he obviously made her uncomfortable.  
Stiles caught Scott’s look, and he was just he seemed just as curious. Allison shook her head a little and sighed.  
“Great, Jordan, it was… great seeing you. Now if you’ll excuse us, we’ll go, okay?” She spoke quickly, but it was obvious this was her way of protecting Lydia from something.  
Guy, just named Jordan, ignored Allison and looked back at the girl in front of him.  
“Listen, I just… I’m here. And I didn’t know you’d be here.” He frowned. “Okay, maybe I did, listen, I just want to talk okay? Can you listen just for one minute?” He sounded hopelessly, and Stiles, knowing that it wasn’t his business in any kind of way, still couldn’t help it. He stepped millimeter closer to Lydia, almost touching her, but it was not the raw attraction that drew him to her, he kind of did it to support this devastated little Bambi in front of him. She was just this beautiful girl he didn’t know, and he still wanted to be close to her. He had to admit that it terrified him.  
“Hey, pal, she doesn’t want to talk to you, okay? Take a chill pill and back off?” He suggested.  
Jordan looked at Stiles, visibly observing his stance and the way his body was invading Lydia’s space. He lifted his eyebrows and tried again.  
“Okay, I get it, you don’t want to talk to me, and I will congratulate you with..any kind of guy you have by your side right now, fine, it’s been too long, but why can’t you just listen to what I have to say? For the love of God, I’m not gonna bite you.”  
Lydia was quietest of all of them. She still looked up to Jordan with wary look on her face, debating what to say or what to do. She tried to ignore the way Stiles gave her chills and warmth at the same time, and decided to focus on one bad decision at a time.  
“No, I don’t want to talk to you.” Lydia admitted, letting out a breath. “I don’t remember our last conversation, so…” As she said these words, Jordan furrowed his eyebrows in what looked like guilt.  
Stiles tried reading Lydia’s face, but at this point she had a strong mask on, a closed book, and he wanted to read and remember every paper of it, he wanted to know every page.   
“We will be going now, okay?” Allison interrupted again. “Just. Don’t do that. You can’t do that, and believe me, she has been amazing without you. You’re dismissed, Parrish. For good.” She finished harshly, and Scott and Stiles exchanged looks of absolute confusion.  
Without saying any other word, Jordan Parrish shrugged in desperation, shot one last apologizing look at Lydia and slumped away to the crowd of dark faces and noises.  
Lydia shivered again and licked her dry lips. She suddenly realized how much question she is going to hear right now, and from who. Sure. _Just what she needed at the moment._  
“Who was that?” She heard his voice before he even said those words. His tone was a mix of disgust and irritation, and she had to admit, it amused her. She didn’t even know, it was possible to feel just a little giddy, after what she had just witnessed.  
“Old friend.” She said shortly and looked at Stiles.  
Nothing in his face told her that he believed her. She felt naked under his gaze but she still kept looking at him, his hazel eyes buried in hers, and both of them counted seconds, until one of them would finally break. Light of the fire lightened only one side of her face but he still got to admire color of her skin. He had not missed a single one of her gestures, and tried to memorize every detail of that appealing face.  
His eyes were asking, questioning if everything was okay. It was only his eyes that could speak, she figured.  
Eventually they did break, but it was because of Allison’s snarky comment.  
“Okay, you know that your eye fucking is very important to me, but please can we go? I’m getting cold.” She whined.  
Both of them rolled their eyes at her and started moving.  
Just before reaching their house, Allison took Lydia’s hand, catching guys’ attention.  
“You want to talk about it, babe?” She inquired thoughtfully.  
Lydia shrugged, feeling three pairs of concerned eyes on her. She smiled to make her answer more assuring.  
“Nope, I really don’t. I’m fine.”  
Allison squeezed her hand in support and smiled, but her eyes were still worried. Lydia held her look for a minute. That was the best thing about having Ally. She already knew what Lydia felt, without the need of explaining it.  
Finally being home felt great.  
“Home sweet home.” Stiles yawned and stretched his arms widely, almost hitting Scott in the face.  
“Jesus, fuck, Stiles. Why don’t you just take a hammer and beat me to death with it?” Scott shrieked, sliding away from the danger of being hit. He turned to Lydia, as Stiles started giggling and made his way to the kitchen.  
“Seriously, Lydia, bring some guns to the bed.” Scott suggested, making his girlfriend laugh.  
Before Lydia could respond, Stiles started choking on his juice he had just began drinking.  
“Oh, I think we’ll have one gun in a bed, buddy.” Stiles winked at Lydia who was storming to the kitchen with a horrified look on her face. She was a fierce little creature, and Stiles could hardly keep his juice down his throat, observing how she looked coming towards him.  
This little tiger was in _his_ apartment, wearing _his_ sweater, which covered a little of her bronze thighs and made his stomach fluster with something that had nothing to do with cold juices that were coming to the bottom of his stomach. Her hair was a mess of flames that set fire to his body and if she was so furious with him right now, he could only imagine how mad and loud she would be under him. _It didn’t matter, his mind liked the image of her on top of him too._  
“Stiles,” she clenched her teeth. _“Where are you sleeping?”_  
Stiles got a little closer to her and thanked the God she didn’t move away. He still thought that it was probably from the act of being brave and fierce and confident. And also, he was sure by now, that chances of her saying “yes” to him, were getting higher every second.  
“I’m sleeping in my bed.” He answered calmly and nearly whimpered when she licked her lips.  
He covered it up by coughing.  
Lydia raised her eyebrows as if she didn’t understand what he said.  
“What? Why?”  
“Well, it’s my bed.” He smiled and she swallowed. His face was intense and passionate, looking down on her, his whiskey eyes sharp in their brightness.  
She wiggled a little in his big hoodie, sexually frustrated in front of a man who was the biggest asshole in the world.  
No. She commanded herself not to feel this way.  
“So you just suggest sleeping in the same bed?” She accused him bitterly.  
He couldn’t help but chuckle at her defiance. Everything had been a battle with Lydia. She’d never willingly agreed with anything he said. And she’d been exhilarating.  
“You think that’s inappropriate?” He questioned taking one seething step closer to her. “I know my charms are hard to resist but please try and control yourself.” He practically breathed out last words.  
Lydia held his gaze strongly, trying to look anywhere but his lips. _She could not survive a night with him._  
“You think you’re so sexy and charming, and everything is a joke to you, huh?”  
“Does that mean you like me?” He murmured.  
“Just an average asshole.” She shrugged nonchalantly.  
There he went bursting into laugh again.  
“I am.” He agreed, clearly entertained by her disdain. “Careful, though, Bambi, don’t waste all your sarcasm in one breath.”  
Lydia shook and with every power she found she turned away from him, knowing she would still be looking.  
After two steps she stopped and perfectly knowing what she was doing, girl started taking off his hoodie.  
Stiles unwillingly nodded at her method, teasingly, slowly, she pulled of his sweatshirt, revealing tan skin on her back, and Stiles noticed dimples on the bottom of her back.  
His fingers curled to fist, and his downstairs curiosity started beating against his jeans.  
 _That’s all she had to do. That was it?_  
 _There was no way he could survive a night with her._  
“You overestimate my self-control.” He whispered almost soundlessly.  
After about two seconds, Lydia triumphantly turned around and threw the hoodie to Stiles. Already knowing she left her sweet candy scent on it, Stiles caught it.  
Without saying another word she went over to the couch, kissed Allison on the cheek, saying goodnight to her and Scott and rushed upstairs.  
“Dude?!” Stiles called.  
When Scott came to the kitchen, he found Stiles with a horrific, or it was hungry expression on his face, his cheeks flushed and lips parted. He held his hoodie in the same position he caught it, and it looked like he wasn’t moving at all.  
“Stiles?” Scott asked and clicked his fingers.  
His best friend looked at him with almost terrified expression.  
“I’m going fucking crazy here, man.” He said in a low voice.  
“What?” Scott asked, but it was unnecessary. “Lydia?”  
“Lydia.” Stiles exhaled.  
“Yeah, man, she’s off limits.” Scott nodded.  
Stiles looked at him with accusatory face.  
“What?”  
Scott sighed and patted his friend’s shoulder.  
“Stiles, I like her. And she’s gonna be around. She’s Allison’s best friend, for fuck’s sake. No sleeping with her.”  
Stiles interrupted him by shaking his head.  
“No, I know. She’s fucking hot and she has mean tongue, yes, but you have no idea how adorable she is. And she’s interesting and she’s actually a sweet person. She reminds me of… Ugh, never mind. She’s… I don’t know, she’s good. She doesn’t put up with my shit. ” He explained slowly.  
Scott watched him with his eyes wide in shock. He grimaced and took a step back.  
“What the fuck, Stiles? That’s not you. Just think of it like that-you’re not her type, okay?”  
At that, Stiles finally cracked an arrogant smile.  
“I’m everyone’s type.”  
**  
He knocked before going into his own room.  
“You don’t have to knock, Stiles.” She heard her voice from the other side of the door. “It’s your room, you know.”  
Taking a deep breath he stepped in. She was going through her suitcase in the corner of the room, and Stiles immediately observed her choice of pajamas.  
She wore way too big t shirt and shorts, and she looked like she tried to dress as ugly as possible. It didn’t work. At least from Stiles’ point of view. Her hair were swept up in a messy bun and few lost strands played around her serious face.  
“Did you find everything okay?” He asked.  
She lifted her eyes from her suitcase. He was standing near the door, as if he had to think about entering his own room.  
Lydia almost smiled. _She intimidated him._  
“Well there was really not much to find.” She stood up and pulled her shirt down, hoping it would cover her legs even more, but Stiles noticed and she stopped.  
Lydia went to bed but stopped before climbing in. It felt awkward and very wrong. She bit her lip, knowing there wasn’t really a way out of this mess.  
Stiles watched quietly, waiting for her to say something, as she kept looking on the mattress.  
“It’s just a bed, Bambi.” He spoke friendly.  
“Yeah,” She laughed. “And I’m just sharing it with you, as I recall.”  
Stiles shrugged, making his best effort to look as ignorant to this fact as possible.  
“Whatever.” He tried. “I’m gonna take a shower.” He added, startled by her, or by his own thoughts. “Just… Pick a pillow and get some rest. I don’t bite.” He assured and that made her smile.  
He was capable of normal human conversation.  
“Unless I’m asked.” Words came naturally and his lips curved into mischievous smile.  
Lydia put her hands on her hips. Ugh, so close. Her whole body was frozen and for a minute she considered arranging her pillow and blanket on the stairs. These soft violet sheets scared her.  
Just as her sleeping pal. It wasn’t him she didn’t trust, though.  
It was herself.  
“Okay, if you’re not in bed when I come back, I’m throwing you in myself.” Stiles stated and left the room.  
Lydia rolled her eyes but his words didn’t upset her. She felt like such a chicken. _Just get the fuck in the bed, you’ll be fine!_  
The girl walked over the bed and switched the light button off. Now it was only moon illuminating the room and his bed seemed even more attractive in this light.  
“What the fuck, Lydia…” she murmured to herself and got into bed.  
His bed was soft and jumpy. Lydia greeted the warmth from the comforter with a relieved sigh and pulled the blanket up to her face. She laid on her right side, turning her back to where Stiles was supposed to be sleeping.  
Stiles barged into the room after about ten minutes. It was semi dark in the room and his eyes ate the sight of a first woman in his bed. His first non-fuck-buddy. She didn’t react to him coming back, but he felt that she wasn’t sleeping yet.  
With only his boxers on, he climbed in a bed and popped on his elbow, waiting for her to turn around. And he knew very well that she would.  
Her eyes were asking “What?”and he smiled again. Damn.  
To him, she seemed so beautiful, so seductive, and different from other girls. This one was actually really smart. He had no idea how to figure her out.  
“Your pillow is not that comfortable.” She noted in a quiet voice.  
Stiles lifted his eyebrows.  
“Would you rather prefer my chest, then?”  
She planted her palm on her eyes in desperation and sighed.  
“Go to hell with your flirting.” She told him gently.  
“Oh, I already exist on a level of hell.” He whispered slowly to her face, his eyes darting from her one eye, to another, then her lips, her nose…  
“Yeah, well exist on one that isn’t near me.” She pouted sweetly.  
Lydia had large, questioning eyes that seemed to draw Stiles in and a sense of quiet outrage that simmered just beneath the surface. More than anything, within her features, there was a streak of wild quirkiness that made her dazzlingly attractive.  
“Who was that guy?” He repeated question from before and her eyes drifted in front of her after that question.  
She looked at the ceiling, editing sentences in her head, feeling him staring at her, patiently waiting.  
“He was my… Ex boyfriend. I guess. I’ve known him for a long time. And one day, two years ago…” She shrugged and puckered her lips, at a excruciating memory. “He kinda just left.”  
“You?” Stiles asked, his voice a little more tense now.  
“Oh, whatever you like to call it. He left town, left his mom, his studies.” She numerated everything in a hushed voice. “Yeah, then I guess he also left me.”  
Stiles expectorated.  
“Why?”  
“I don’t know.” She answered quickly. “But he kinda ruined it for me.”  
Stiles frowned and she looked at him.  
“Ruined what? C’mon,” he encouraged her softly, seeing as her mouth was opening to say no.  
Lydia sighed again.  
“No, that’s… whatever. It’s done. I’m fine, and I don’t know what he wants but he’s not gonna get it.” She added a little too carelessly to convince him.  
Stiles decided to drop it and laid on his side, turning away from her. His minds were running and he felt her shift on the bed.  
His back was to her and he was wearing his boxers and nothing else. His shoulders, the smooth muscles of his back, the wide expanse of smooth, tan skin, was all exposed to the naked eye and Lydia was blinded by the beauty of it. So much, she wondered how she didn't throw out her hand reeling.  
At that thought, he turned and gave her a view of his chest. She swiftly lifted her look to his face.  
His eyes were focused, and she eyed him curiously.  
“What?”  
He shrugged, and spoke in a husky voice.  
“Another time, another place, I'd back you to that wall right there, or any place you wanted to go, and do everything in my power to wipe him from your mind.“  
She shoved him playfully, happy that he couldn’t see the color of her cheeks.  
“Just go to sleep, okay, hero?”  
She heard him yawn.  
“Fine.” He said, his words a little slurred. “But before I pass out, I want you to know that you’re the hottest biscuit and I would never leave such a sweet biscuit…” He completely breathed out the last words and fell asleep like a rock.  
Lydia turned away from him and closed her eyes, trying to focus on sleeping, and not radiation of warmth she felt from his body.  
When she also finally passed out, something on Stiles’ computer table lit up.  
Lydia’s screen soundlessly marked: “ _3 missed messages from Jordan Parrish._ ”


	6. Where are we, huh?

Lydia woke up her hearing being tickled by soft snoring. She didn’t open her eyes yet, but she could feel the sun. What was the time?   
She almost jumped up from the sound of an alarm clock going crazy.   
“Stiles? Your alarm.” She whispered and opened her heavy eyes. He didn’t move.  
“Stiles!” She repeated, nudging him.   
His phone was on the table by his head, but he kept his breathing soft and steady, his diaphragm slowly moving up and down.   
“Ugh.” Lydia groaned. Well that’s something to wake up to.   
When he still didn’t stir, she reached across him, fumbling in the dim light until she finally found the button. She put some of her weight on top of him, and when she felt warm skin beneath her fingers she wrenched back and fell against her pillow with a huff.   
Stiles chuckled.   
“You were awake?”   
Stiles opened his eyes, and he was sure, that if she wasn’t facing the pillow, he would definitely see her rolling eyes at him.   
“You were the one laying on me.” He yawned.   
She popped up on her elbows and rubbed her eyes, feeling that there was not much left from her bun, it was now all the way down to her neck.   
“I didn’t lay on you.” Lydia protested, pulling her hair tie from her curls. Stiles looked at her and she was happy to acknowledge that his hair was just as messy as hers. “I couldn’t reach the clock. That has to be the most annoying alarm I’ve ever heard. It sounds like a dying animal.” She grumbled.   
They both sat up at the same time and since she was lying on her stomach, they faced each other.   
Lydia blinked a few times and observed his image. His hair was sticking out in about fifteen directions, and his eyes were small and puffy. Deep dark circles hugged his whiskey eyes and he peeped to her through his eyelashes.   
“You drool.” He smirked softly and his eyes were even smaller now.   
Lydia bit her lip from embarrassment and avoiding his smiley eyes, swung her feet over the side. Stiles watched her move as she shuffled to the door.   
“Where are you going?” He asked.   
“To get dressed and go study. Do you need an itinerary while I’m here?”   
He got out of the bed with a sigh and walked over to her, still in his boxers, which hung dangerously low from his hips.  
“Are you always this temperamental, or will that taper off, once you believe I’m not just creating some elaborate scheme to get in your pants?” His hands cupped her shoulders playfully and she felt his warm fingers squeezing her skin softly.   
“I am _not_ temperamental.” She noted.   
He laughed at that and nodded, raising his eyebrows.   
“I’m not trying to sleep with you, relax.” He assured her one more time and without leaving the room for her to say anything; he walked right past her to the bathroom.   
Lydia stood there, stunned. So as flirty as he was, it appeared that Stiles Stilinski, who seemed like screwing every one, had no desire to even try and sleep with her.   
Stiles Stilinski was confusing little shit.   
She shook her head and still having that thought, left the room.   
Allison was already downstairs and she greeted her in the kitchen, reading magazine and drinking coffee, her bare legs thrown on the table.   
Lydia hummed. The smell reached her nostrils and really woke her up. Even more than the awkward talk with Stiles.   
Allison smiled and Lydia couldn’t help but wonder if it was just good morning for her, or if it was also a good night?   
“Wakey, wakey, eggs’n bakey!”   
Lydia walked to the table to pour some kitchen and stroked her hair, trying to get rid of the tangles.  
“You’re turning into your mother, Ally,” she grumbled.  
Her friend just grinned and lifted her eyes from the magazine she was reading.   
“Oooh… did someone miss some sleep last night?” She wiggled her eyebrows, implying something Lydia knew would never happen.   
“He barely breathed in my direction.” She took a sip of her coffee and rolled her eyes.  
Without a chance for Allison to support her disappointed smile with some snarky comment, both Scott and Stiles came down, loudly making their way downstairs. They both looked clean and fresh. Scott kissed Allison on the cheek and smiled to Lydia.   
Stiles walked into the kitchen and there was a smirk playing on his face, like he couldn’t help it. It was kinda infecting, and Lydia smiled too.   
“Oh, is that coffee, Bambi?” He rubbed his palms together.   
She giggled.  
“Yeah, you want some?”   
He nodded at her and she offered him her own cup. When he looked at her questioningly, she raised her eyebrows.  
“I have to go get dressed?” She explained.  
Stiles took it without any word obviously biting back a grin. Lydia noticed, but stopped herself from rolling her eyes at him. She was doing it too much, and that was giving him way too much pleasure.   
He took a long good sip of her coffee and gawked at her as she walked around him and out of the kitchen. Her full thighs moved with delicate strides and Stiles adored that her little feet were bare, he could definitely get used to this image walking around his house.   
Still, he liked her golden hair the most. She had the prettiest hair he had ever seen on a girl. Her curls bounced in unison with every sway of her hips and although they were a complete mess, he was sure it was very soft, perfect for his fingers to grab it.   
Kinda like the girl herself.   
Taking another taste, he wondered what she would do if he threw some mud in that hair. Hm. Probably kill him.   
“Stiles?”   
“Yeah?”   
“Are you going to that party at Oak Creek? On Saturday?”  
Stiles shrugged.  
“Probably not. Last year was terrible.”   
Allison eyed him curiously and Scott raised his eyebrow, smile curving on his lips.  
“You went home with two girls.”   
Stiles nodded and widened his eyes.  
“Yeah. And thank God one of those girls was Malia, because the party sucked, pretty much. So as the other girl…” He added lower and put his emptied mug in the sink.   
Allison squeaked.  
“Ew!”   
Both guys laughed and Stiles joined them by the table. Allison threw her long legs down, so that they wouldn’t be right in his face. He beamed at her, receiving a slap on his head from Scott.  
“Don’t smirk at my girl, Stilinski.” He provoked with a smile.  
“Whatever. What are we doing today?”   
They took their conversation to the living room, and made themselves comfortable on the couch. Scott put his head on Allison’s lap and glanced up to her like a puppy.   
“But you’re going, right?”   
She gently ruffled his hair and smiled.  
“If Lydia is going. We kinda made a deal this summer.” She winked, catching Stiles’ attention.   
“What deal?” He asked inquisitively, putting remote control on the table.   
“No parties solo this year.” She looked at him.  
Part of him wanted to snort at that, the other part wanted to dig deeper. His Bambi was a closed book. Well, not exactly. She wasn’t his Bambi. She was just a Bambi. He always liked that name, though it never really fit on anyone else before. When he had said it, it was to her face, and it felt even more natural than the name Lydia. In his mind a nickname Bambi sounded like a beautiful girl with big eyes and sexy legs.   
Yeah, she was a Bambi.  
“Why do you have that deal?”   
Allison lifted her eyes to his again and it was clear that she immediately got careful with what she was about to say. Before editing words in her mind she looked at Scott and touched her palm to his cheek. Then she finally responded to Stiles.  
“It’s better when we have each other. We… tend to get in trouble. At least we did, back in Washington. It’s actually why we came here together. I kinda… followed her to Berkeley.” She smiled a bit. “She’s my best friend and…”She tilted her head to both sides. “You know. There are things I want to protect her from.”   
Before Stiles could ask another fifty questions, Lydia came downstairs, looking like a Christmas morning. Her hair was styled in some way that it was loose, and tied, and messy. He had no idea how the hell girls did that, but it seemed like every single one knew that trick. Her face, now livelier had more color and Stiles internally gave her soft pink shorts and oversized cream sweater approving nod.   
He had to admit; right now it was better to think about first ten minutes of Saving Private Ryan to keep his excitement from becoming visible.   
She was reading something on her phone, her eyebrows furrowed and her lips falling into a pout. Still keeping her focus on the screen she sat down on an armchair.   
“What’s up?” Stiles asked her.   
Lydia raised her glimpse at him and shook her head.  
“Nothing. Uhm. Just my mom.” She smiled softly and looked at Allison. “Did you study for that English lit test?”  
“When is it?”   
“ _This afternoon?_ ”   
Allison groaned and leaned over Scott, hiding her face with her dark pony tail.  
“No and I don’t want to. And plus I spent the night reassuring my boyfriend that you weren’t going to sleep with Stiles.” Her voice was clamped and grumpy.   
“ _Ally_.”   
Stiles leaned back on the couch and grunted.  
“Jesus, Scott. You’ve got it bad, huh buddy?”   
Scott didn’t answer, but Lydia smiled appreciatively at Stiles for the diversion.   
Allison lifted her face from Scott’s and caressed his cheek gently.  
“He’s going to be okay. It’s just going to take him awhile to believe that Lydia is resistant to your charms.”   
Stiles sniffed, seeming a little annoyed.  
“For fuck’s sake I’m gonna wear a sign saying I’M NOT TRYING TO SLEEP WITH LYDIA MARTIN on my forehead, okay?”   
All of them giggled and Stiles rolled his eyes but winked at Lydia.   
“Did _you_ study?”   
Lydia frowned adorably.  
“No amount of studying is going to help me with English literature. It’s just my side class, but I still can’t wrap my head around it. I would easily take extra math’s class than that bullshit.”   
He immediately stood up, offering her his hand.   
“C’mon.”   
She looked at him suspiciously. His eyes were friendly and warm, but he still looked like sin in plaid.   
“What?”  
“Let’s go. I’m gonna help you study.”   
Her eyes went from suspicious to skeptical.   
“You. You are going to help me study English Literature.”   
He nodded and shrugged, his offered hand still hanging in front of her.   
“I’m awesome at it.”   
Scott laughed interrupting their conversation.   
“He’s awesome at every class. I hate him.”   
Lydia smiled, feeling a little challenged, but at the same time impressed. She sighed and took his hand.  
He put his hand on the small of her back in overly friendly movement and they both walked upstairs. Before leaving the room Lydia received a mischievous smile from Allison but decided to ignore it.   
They popped on his bed and she gave him her book. He quizzed her relentlessly, and then clarified a few things she didn’t understand. He was serious.   
It suited him. He was half laying on the mattress and passionately explained her the plot of her chosen book. She listened, asked questions, then listened again.   
Stiles was actually very intelligent and well educated. Lydia unconsciously licked her pink lips, focusing on his husky voice. There was one way of two. She’s either going to remember everything perfectly, or she’s going to forget everything except the movements of his damn lips and the fire in his whiskey eyes.   
After another half an hour she couldn’t take it anymore and interrupted him.  
“Okay. That’s too much English for me for today.”   
He smiled and stretched, his shirt shamelessly rolling up his stomach. Ignoring that itchy feeling in his fingertips when he looked at her crossed bare legs, Stiles got up, not trusting himself enough to stay on the bed and not use it.  
“It’s almost twelve. Come on, I’ll walk you to class.”   
He waited for her to gather her supplies, watching her with amusement. She moved like a little cat, unbelievably cute but fast and focused at the same time. Her long hair moved on her shoulders, catching sun rays in them, making them golden.   
This girl was a little magic.   
“Ready?” She asked.   
They left the room and walking first, Lydia made disgusted face finding Scott and Allison in heavy make out session on the couch. She couldn’t comprehend where hands and legs were; frankly they looked like two eels.  
“So much black hair…” Lydia murmured unwillingly. Stiles peeked at her from behind and growled with laughter, hearing her quiet thoughts. Couple immediately jumped back from one another and shot them both irritated looks.   
“Sorry to interrupt…” Lydia said.  
“ _Nope, actually not sorry at all._ ”   
“But we’re leaving. And I suggest you go get dressed, Ally, it’s in half an hour.”  
Stiles closed the door behind them and led Lydia outside, where the sun greeted them with a warm welcome.   
He quizzed her all the way to the University and she answered every one of the question right. Near the door of her auditorium, he elbowed her impishly.   
“You’re gonna ace that test.” Lydia sighed.  
“Hey, Stiles. Long time.”   
Guy appeared from Lydia’s back and calmly greeted Stiles. Lydia immediately noted that he was attractive, she had already seen him before. Yeah, he was definitely in her class. Guy was taller than her, but way shorter than Stiles.   
“Jackson,” Stiles nodded, his voice somehow tensed. Lydia remembered that girl Malia and what how she teased him about that. From the way Stiles immediately went edgy, it was probably the same guy.  
Jackson’s eyes brightened a bit when he saw Lydia and he smiled.  
“Hi, Lydia.”  
“Hi.” She said, surprised he knew her name.   
Jackson continued to his seat, joking with those, sitting beside him.   
“Who’s that?” Lydia wondered out loud.   
“Ass-wipe.” Stiles shrugged, skin around his eyes still indicated his worry.   
She decided not to ask him more; she had no intention of irritating him now that they had just made a normal conversation, with no teasing and flirting. She liked this kind of Stiles. Deep down, she knew she probably liked any kind of Stiles, but this version of him… At least she was more able to control her tongue.   
“Anyway, thanks for helping me.” Lydia nudged him with her elbow.  
His eyes softened and for a second he got a little closer, as if he wanted to hug her or probably do something else he’s going to regret.   
In those seconds, he calculated possibility of dying if he would hug her, kiss her on the cheek, give her adorable chin a little pinch. Deciding that his chances of surviving were pretty low, he controlled himself and took a step backwards.   
“Yeah…” He scratched the back of his neck. “Good luck, Bambi.” He winked at her and walked away, passing rushing Allison. Lydia looked at him walking away a little torn. She could feel the color in her cheeks rise again.  
“How did it go?” Allison asked a little breathlessly.   
Both of them turned to class and Lydia shook her head, chasing away the image of his confusion. Damn that guy had a lot of faces.   
“Uhm. He’s a good tutor.”  
“ _Just_ a tutor?”   
Lydia sighed.   
“He’s a good friend too.”   
Her best friend seemed disappointed and Lydia giggled at the fallen expression on her face.  
It had always been a dream of Allison’s for them to date friends, and roommates-slash-best friends, for her, was hitting the jackpot.   
“Oh my God!” Lydia grabbed Allison’s hand. “Jordan texted me last night. Three fucking times!” She loudly whispered, as she noticed students near her going over their notes.  
“What?!” Allison squeaked and took a seat, still looking at her friend.  
“He apologized and he wants to see me. Again.” Allison could hear concern in her voice and she squeezed her hand.   
“Just wait until he goes back… I still can’t believe he’s not over you.”  
“Of course he is.” Lydia murmured and rolled her eyes.   
“Baby, if two years in Afghanistan didn’t make him forget about you, nothing will…” She smiled sadly.   
“Ugh, he will…” Lydia murmured now facing her test, knowing probably no one hears her now. “They always do.”   
She easily breezed through the test, hearing silent swearing and sighing from Allison on her right.   
Lydia sat down on the steps outside the building, waiting for Ally, who joined her in about ten minutes.  
“That was awful!” She cried in defeat and slumped down beside her best friend.   
“You should study with us. Stiles explains it really well.”   
Allison got up ant chortled.  
“More like, no thanks.”   
“Lydia!”   
Both girls turned around and Lydia narrowed her eyes a bit, seeing Jackson jogging across the grass to get closer.  
“I don’t think we’ve officially met.” He said holding out his hand. “Jackson Whittermore.”   
Lydia smiled and took it.  
“Lydia Martin.”   
“I was behind you the whole test. Congratulations.” He smiled shoving his hands in his pockets.  
“Thanks. Stiles helped me; otherwise I would’ve been… Awful.” Allison snorted in the background.  
“Oh, are you guys…”  
“Just friends.”   
He nodded and smiled in relief.  
“Did he tell you there’s a party at Oak Creek this Saturday?”   
Lydia laughed.  
“No, we mostly fight. Or, as it appears, we are capable of studying together.”  
Jackson joined in her laughing, flashing his perfect Banana Republic-model smile with his square jaw and naturally tan skin.   
“Yeah, that sounds like him. Especially the fighting part. Anyway, I hope I’ll see you at the party?”  
Lydia ignored his comment and nodded.  
“Maybe.”   
He winked at her, walking away.  
“I’ll come find you.”   
She watched him walk away; he was nice built, clean shaven, with a pressed pin-striped dress shirt and jeans. Lydia bit her lip, flattered at his invitation.  
Allison whistled near her.   
“He’s cute, huh?” Lydia asked still smiling.   
“Hell yes, he’s cute!” Her friend squeaked and hooked her arm around Lydia’s neck, two friends happily walking back to the apartment.   
**  
Allison and Lydia both froze when the first thing they saw when they opened the door was a tall brunette, emerging from the bathroom, buttoning her blouse.  
Lydia recognized her from the other day. Malia.  
“Hi.” She simply said. Her mascara smeared eyes examined both girls, and then she started stroking her short hair.   
Allison playfully glared at Scott.  
He held up his hands. “She’s with Stiles.”   
Stiles rounded the corner in a pair of boxers and yawned. He looked at the girls and patted Malia’s backside.  
“My friends are here. You better go.”   
Leggy brunette provokingly turned to him and hooked her hands around his neck.   
“I’ll leave my number on the counter. I changed it.”   
She leaned in another kiss, to which Stiles didn’t respond back. Lydia watched them with disgusted expression, not even trying to hide it.   
“Don’t worry about it.” He said in a casual tone.   
Malia leaned back to look at his eyes.   
“What?”  
“You’re seriously surprised?” Lydia blurted out, still witnessing this comedy in her new living room.   
The girl narrowed her eyes at her with an aggressive look, then shot the same look to Stiles, grabbed her purse and stormed out, passing Lydia with a deadly scowl.   
When the door shut, Stiles stretched and looked at Lydia with a smile. His hair was ruffled, messed up on purpose and his whole body reeked of sex. Girl was somewhere between turned on and thoroughly disgusted.  
“What’s wrong, Bambi? Test didn’t go well?”   
Lydia parted her lips to say something mean but decided that honesty at this point, was probably not the best policy.  
“Nope. Cool.” She nodded, but he still looked at her provokingly and she couldn’t control herself. “Just revolted.”  
He smirked.  
“With me, princess?”  
“Yup.” She popped the “p” and made her way to the kitchen. Her very much an asshole and very much half naked roommate followed her.  
“Why?”  
“How can you treat them like that?” She turned around and her eyes met his bare chest. How the hell did they manage to meet this way?  
“Why didn’t you take her number?”   
Stiles snorted at that and some plucky new feeling inside of him made him take a step closer.  
“Why would I take her number if I’m not going to call her?”   
He was happy to see her little startled by his closeness and she licked her lips, looking angrier with every second.  
“Why would you sleep with her if you’re not going to call her?”   
He tilted his head at her with a grin.  
“Bambi, she didn’t stipulate a relationship before she spread eagle on my couch. I didn’t promise anyone anything.”   
Lydia shivered at his words, looking for any kind of shame in his dark eyes but she only find amusement.  
“She’s someone’s daughter Stiles. What if someone treats your daughter like that?” She asked accusingly.   
He sighed.  
“Well let’s put it this way. My daughter better not drop her panties for some jackass. And talking about Malia…” He shrugged. “Do women deserve to be treated like sluts? No. Do sluts deserve to be treated like sluts? Yes. If she carried herself with respect I would’ve given it to her.”  
With that he walked around her to get some juice from the fridge and went back to the living room. He left her sick from his behavior and he found it somehow endearing.   
Still, her look was stabbing. It confirmed every mean and low thing he’d ever thought about himself, the stuff he hopes people will never know about him. He felt so naked. So terrified. Somebody sent shivers up and down his spine, but it wasn’t the cold juice.   
He caught Allison and Scott in the middle of a conversation. She was vigorously telling him a something.  
“He totally asked her out!”   
“Who did what now?” Stiles asked nonchalantly.   
Allison looked at him cautiously but that didn’t make her excitement go away.  
“One guy from our class asked Lydia out! It was adorable.” She peeped and clapped her hands.   
“As long as he asked out Lydia.” Scott winked.   
Stiles grimaced and folded his arms.   
“Who was it?”   
Ignoring his cold tone, Lydia walked into the room.   
“Ally’s imagining things.”   
Allison’s face went to shock.  
“Lydia! You big, fat liar! It was Jackson Whittemore and it was so obvious! Guy was practically drooling!”   
Stiles’ expression twisted into disgust. “ _Jackson Whittemore?_ ”   
“Calm down, jesus.” Scott rolled his eyes.   
“He just… informed me about the party this Saturday.” Lydia explained, feeling irritated with herself, that she felt the need to do that.   
“He said he would see you there, babe.”   
“I was going to take you to that party.” Stiles blurted out receiving surprised looks from all three of them. Lydia’s eyes had a little doubt in them and Scott supported her look.  
“You said this morning that you weren’t going.”   
Stiles looked daggers at his best friend.  
“ _I changed my mind, Scott, what’s the problem?”_ His jaw tightened.   
Nobody answered him and Lydia quietly withdrew to her room.   
He flirts, he says he doesn’t sleep with her, he likes her, he fucks other girls and now he’s irritated with the idea of someone else taking her to the party?   
Lydia bit her lip shivering at the thought that he was exactly why she ran away from Washington. She didn’t need this. Version of him had already hurt her.   
“You okay?” He appeared from behind.  
Girl nodded but didn’t say anything. She ripped tiny bun down from the crown of her hair and brushed it with her fingers. He couldn’t stop staring while she rewrapped it into a chaotic bun, creating a sexy look, without probably even trying to.   
He was still gawking at her when she finished, and she noticed it, obvious but shy smile curving on her face, and he came out of his trance. Without other word she threw herself on the bed, laid on the back, her legs bent, she focused her look on the ceiling.  
He joined her in the same position, subconsciously laying a little too close.   
“Jesus.” She giggled carefree. “Maybe I should just lay on you, huh?”   
He seemed to actually think about the joke she had just made and smirked.  
“Well, laying on top of me is better than laying on a bed. It doesn’t give you rising heat.” _Or a supply of functioning erection_ , he added soundlessly.   
“Right.” She laughed.   
He beamed at her with adoration but she still didn’t look at him.   
“Why were you so mad this morning?” He remembered.  
“What? Oh. Nothing. Just… Jordan. He texted me last night.”   
Stiles shook his head.  
“What’s up with that dude? Seriously, what did you do to him?” He laughed humorlessly.  
She just shrugged.  
“I loved him. That’s what dumb girls do.”  
“You’re not dumb.” He frowned.  
“I’m hanging out with you, aren’t I?” She stuck her tongue out and peeked at him.   
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” He chuckled. “Why are you so mad at him? If you loved him?” He insisted, his voice half mocking.  
Lydia though for a second before answering him. He was waiting patiently, just laying next to her, almost sharing same breath.   
“He just… We wanted different things, just simply different paths.” She looked away from him. “Basically we were not good for each other. He was always keeping me too close to let me breathe easily.”   
He considered her words quietly and she eyed him inquisitively. He didn’t say anything; he just looked in front of him, feeling her warm breath on her cheek.   
Lydia saw that there was something quiet going on in his head and she couldn’t help it.  
“What?” She questioned silently.   
He shook his head and placed his palms under it. His eyes, now looking somewhere up, were deep and serious, a face he didn’t wear very often.  
“One day…” he started quietly, as if he was considering whether or not he should say it. “One day you’ll kiss a man you can’t breathe without. And you’ll find that breath is of little consequence.”  
He finished in whisper, having no idea how both, hot and cold he made Lydia feel near him, staring at his still expression.   
Then he calmly turned to her and smiled.


	7. Close

_His smile, a little mischievous around the edges, had her melting into the sand. Then his lips brushed hers, and the stars collided. She cupped his face in her hands and shut her eyes.Kissing had always ranked high on her list of favorite things to do, but Stiles took it to a whole new level. Forget about his mouth on her fingertips, this linked to all her happy zones and more.He'd literally swept her off her feet and his kiss quickened the beat of her heart. His lips were soft and warm and hungry. His kiss moved through her like warm honey, filling all the places inside her that had been cold for a while now. He was right. Breathing was not necessary. He slid his tongue along the seam of her lips, licking her before he pressed further. She willingly opened to him, stroked his tongue, kissed him harder. He groaned. He tasted like caramel and everything good as he delved deeper and committed a full-on assault inside her mouth. His hand gripped her waist. They sank further into the sand.She clutched his shoulders, smoothed her palms down his back. He pulled gruffly away, nipped at her ear. "You have no idea how much I want you," he said._  
“Lydia?”  
She immediately woke up and sat up in a rapid movement. Her breathing was quickened; she was covered in small amount of cold sweat and her speedy heartbeat accompanied it.  
She put her hand on her chest trying to calm down a little. Her eyes were wide and lost, scanning Stiles’ room. Well this was a first.  
“Hm, yes?” Lydia asked, her voice a little crooked from sleep, trying to sound as normal as possible. In a second Scott barged into the room, carelessly eating tortilla chips.  
“Wanna get downstairs, see a movie?” He suggested and popped down on the bed.  
Girl shook her head, not actually sure if it was for Scott or for herself. She licked her lips and got up, freeing her bare legs from Stiles’ messed up sheets. She wiped a little sweat from her forehead and walked to the table, not even sure what she planned on doing.  
“Uhm, no thanks.” She responded avoiding his eyes. ”Uh, shower. I want to shower.” She nodded, distracted by flashes of a dream she had just had, playing in her head.  
Scott shrugged and got straight to the door. Before reaching for the handle he looked back at her, looking ridiculous in his summer shorts, cluttered black hair and pack of chips in his hand.  
“You okay? You look..I don’t know.” He asked.  
Lydia nodded and smiled friendly at him, hoping it looks as genuine as she wanted.  
“Yeah, I’m fine. Bad dream.” _Lies, Lydia. Certainly not a bad one._ “What time is it?”  
“I don’t know, about three.” Scott shrugged again and left the room.  
About three. So her afternoon nap took a little longer than she planned. They were going out at nine. That meant that Allison would be bursting in her room to get ready and scream about how she doesn’t have what to wear in about…half an hour.  
Lydia took a deep breath again and walked to the bathroom. Right now, all she wanted was a shower to wash her confusion away and a proper explanation. Yes, she has been spending a lot of time with Stiles, and she was sleeping near him every night but her subconscious seemed to tease with a little more.  
She swallowed involuntarily. It felt so real. And, man, so good. She sighed, dropping her oversized t shirt on the bathroom floor and shook her head again. She tested the water and at the right temperature stepped in.  
Warm water started running through her body, but she couldn’t bring herself to do anything. She just stood there, her hands intertwined at the back of her neck, heavy drops making their way down, running paths through her skin. Girl simply kept her eyes on the floor, trying to find it in herself why the dream flustered her so much. She was lost between ashamed and aroused, absolutely confused and lightheaded.  
Just repeating the dream over and over again in her head, made her body electric. Yeah, well, he had that effect on her.  
Lines were slowly getting very blurry.  
Suddenly someone ripped the bathroom door open. Lydia mentally cursed guys for not making the lock on the door a few times before, but still, she instinctively shrieked.  
“Ally?!”  
She heard soft chuckling which certainly didn’t belong to her best friend. Oh yeah, of course. That was exactly what she needed.  
“What the hell are you doing here?!”  
“Brushing my teeth, Bambi, relax.” He replied lightly.  
She rolled her eyes and peeked out of the plastic curtain, holding it against her chest.  
Stiles looked up at her, his lips covered in suds from his toothpaste. Smile curved on his lips, his teeth still gripping the toothbrush. He looked so ludicrous Lydia almost smiled.  
“At three o’clock, Stiles? Seriously.”  
He kept brushing his teeth and she looked at his toothbrush moving against his mouth. As soon as she realized what she was staring at she closed her eyes briefly, and rubbed her temple with her free hand.  
“Done.” He announced proudly and wiped his lips with his towel. He didn’t leave though; he slightly turned to her and yawned.  
“Okay, so we’ll probably just call a cab. I doubt any of us will be in the shape to drive back to the apartment tonight, am I right?” Guy snickered.  
“For the love- Stiles, do we really have to talk about this, now?”  
He looked at her and grinned at her wet hair and wide heated green eyes.  
“Right. Sorry, okay.”  
He stepped back and Lydia went back under the stream. She grabbed a bottle of shower gel, but something came to her mind and she called his name.  
“Stiles?”  
He opened the door in about two seconds, but she didn’t hear them close, so she figured he was just standing in the doorway.  
“Yep?  
She gave a slight cough, before starting.  
“Can you bring some…shirt? Any T-shirt? There should be a pair of them on my chair. And sweatpants.” She added.  
“There is a T-shirt furiously thrown on the ground right here?” He noted curiously.  
“Yeah, but I fell asleep in them. And uhm, it was kinda… hot.” She stuttered, covering her eyes with one hand. Lydia thanked the Gods he didn’t see her now.  
She didn’t hear him make any sound for a few seconds, then he shut the door leaving her in shower alone, feeling more naked than she already is.  
It didn’t take him more than two minutes and he came in to the bathroom, she heard a quiet sound of something being put on the toilet seat. She wondered if she should thank him, but he left closed the door again so she just sighed in relief. _Ok, just pull yourself together. It’s no big deal. It was a simple dream that meant nothing._  
When she got out of the shower she grabbed her towel and smiled at the clothes Stiles had brought her. It was some dark red T-shirt that certainly wasn’t hers, and he brought a pair of his own Spiderman boxers.  
She quickly drained herself and blow dried her hair.  
When she pulled on his boxers they were a little too big for her, but they still hung on her hips, with no danger of falling down. Lydia thought of how it was surely not the case with him and the boxers he was sleeping in. Every night it somehow managed to find its way down his body, just a bit, just enough to wake up a little insanity.  
She waved that thought away and put on his T-shirt, which now, spread out looked more like a jersey. It had number twenty-four on both front and back, and also his last name STILINSKI in white big letters.  
She sank in them, it covered her like a mini dress, and looking at the mirror she already considered how much Stiles is going to tease her about it. Of course he had to bring her his own clothing.  
Lydia slumped down the stairs and first thing she saw was Allison, she was painting her nails on the main table in the living room. Brunette lifted her eyes and smiled looking at Lydia up and down, narrowing her eyes at the name on the shirt.  
“Well well.” She sighed with a smirk. “If I didn’t know better…” She tilted her head.  
“Shut up, Ally.” Stiles appeared from the kitchen. He didn’t even try to hide the smug smile on his face and Lydia looked at him challengingly, waiting for him to start his tirade.  
“Oh, thanks by the way.” She said pulling on his T-shirt.  
He simply leaned on the counter, with a happy expression on his face, not even a giddy one, just merely cheerful.  
“No problem, Lydia.”  
His hand gripped her waist. They sank further into the sand.  
An awkward feeling made her look away and she turned to Allison for help.  
“Where’s Scott?”  
Allison shook her hands to make the paint dry and then blew on them.  
“I don’t know, getting take out? These two,” she pointed her head at Stiles. “Have absolutely no intention on looking handsome tonight.”  
Stiles rolled his eyes.  
Lydia groaned with a mischievous smile and Stiles sneered too, like a magnet.   
“You’re gonna make me wear something really tight, right?” She asked.  
“Nope,” girl stood up from the chair. “You’re gonna dress like that yourself.” She winked and Stiles whistled.  
Lydia shot nasty looks to both of them and Allison grabbed her hand, dragging her upstairs.  
“Hey, Bambi, if you want any more of my clothes, just ask!” Stiles shouted to her, watching girls rush upstairs.  
She didn’t respond, but laughed freely, her body catching on fire just a little bit in his big jersey.  
Surprising Lydia, Allison went to Stiles and Lydia’s room. She sat on the bed and faced Lydia’s suitcase, wiggling her eyebrows.  
“Oh, c’mon.” Her friend peeped. “We have at least two hours. At least.”  
Allison’s face dropped and she pouted.  
“Fine.” She patted on the place next to her. “What’s up?”  
Girl shrugged, avoiding those brown eyes in front of her. She wasn’t sure she wanted to tell Allison how confused she felt and how she couldn’t name it. A dream is just a dream right? There was no need to dramatize or look for a hidden meaning. Although, she though, it wasn’t that hidden. It was quite obvious. And hot. In her mind, Lydia shamefully prayed for Boilers to get fixed sooner.  
“What?” Allison eyed her suspiciously.  
“I don’t know, Ally. Everything’s great. Probably. Maybe.”  
“Just spit it out, Lydia!” Her friend rolled her eyes.  
“Okay okay. Listen, maybe living here isn’t the best idea.” She asked carefully.  
Brunette frowned.  
“Why? What’s wrong here?”  
Lydia sat next to her and leaned her head on Allison’s shoulder.  
“No, nothing’s wrong…” She murmured.  
She kept her head on Allison’s comforting shoulder and bit her lip. There were so many things that were wrong. Stiles was getting under her skin. It was not even funny anymore. It’s all banter and fun until it’s not. Where is the line when it’s not, anymore? Normally, she liked boundaries. Boundaries were the safety net. Boundaries kept people on the right path. But he made it feel like rules were made to be broken and consequences were miles and miles away. He made her reconsider a lot of things. Too much things. Not so friendly and probably not so smart actions. He was a little too much, he was a little trouble.  
**  
Time went flying by, when Lydia and Allison conquered Scott’s room. They brought their makeup, dresses, everything. He ran away from that room as soon as he could, kissing Allison before leaving. He also grabbed jeans and T-shirt from the closet, and Lydia laughed at how simple it was for them.  
When Scott rapidly flew out from his own room, which was now turned into a beauty salon, girls started picking out their clothing. Allison put on first dress she found and Lydia nodded.  
“Hot. Whatever you’ll be wearing, Scott will love it. I swear to God, woman, put on one stocking on your face and he’ll probably drool himself.”  
Allison squeaked happily and her eyes immediately lit up. Everything about her screamed how happy she was. Lydia winked at her.  
“Okay, chickie!” Allison clapped her hands together.  
She looked Lydia up and down in her pink robe and shook her head in fake defeat.  
“You are walking sex on a stick. Do you even need my advice on what to wear?”  
Stiles and Scott were both downstairs, playing video games and scaring girls upstairs with their bursting laughing from time to time.  
Stiles kept his eyes on the front, but they saw nothing. His mind was not on the game. Lydia Martin, crazy little girl upstairs, has been taking more and more of his focus. He wasn’t sure what it was.  
He didn’t know why but she didn’t put up with his bullshit. She didn’t get all flirty around him. She stood her ground, smart, beautiful, like good strong shot of whiskey but she added so much sweetness to this comparison. She made him feel keen and thrilled and… scared. She was amazing, but intense. She was mean but she was one of the most heartfelt people he had ever met.  
He didn’t even want to think about sleeping next to her every night.  
She was little flame, breathing evenly, wrapped in his blanket. She was next to him every night, and he also was able to see her in the mornings. By now, Stiles had noticed that she usually steals his side of the blanket to bring everything on the upper part of her body, leaving her feet completely bare. She was ridiculous. She was ridiculous, and gorgeous, and feisty, both funny, sweet and sexy.  
He had no idea what was happening to him. The worst part was not knowing. Of course, thinking, racking his brain in the question of what she thought about him was not a candy too.  
He didn’t know what it was, he had never felt as lost as now. Lydia stole his breath and his common sense with just a smile. She made his dick hard and his body tense with the slightest image of her bare skin and soft figure. She was not healthy for him. Toxic.   
“Dude, you suck!” Scott mocked his friend, in response receiving a slap in the face. He stretched and glanced at the watch.  
“Seriously, you okay?” He asked Stiles. His eyes were shining, like they were made from glass. Scott wondered if he had smoked weed anytime now.  
“Seriously, if you’re stoned and you didn’t invite me…”  
“Oh, shut up. They’re coming, you Mexican idiot.”  
The sound of girls’ heels was followed by their laughter. Lydia came down first and Stiles could barely stay calm. He nearly whimpered at the sight of her. She was wearing lose nude dress with long sleeves, dress’s length ended on her upper thighs. Light high heels suited her, but the best item she was wearing was a genuine smile. She brushed her hair with her fingers. Her golden locks moved like a hundred moths, all trying to saturate themselves in sunlight. His eyes darted from her dress to her hair and back.  
“Thanks.” Lydia showed him a tip of her tongue, understanding his look without words and he smiled, shaking his head.  
“You look fantastic.”  
For a few seconds she seemed remotely shy, and his compliment shut everyone up. Allison smiled, wrapping her hands around Scott’s middle.  
“Jackson is going to dig it!” She squealed.  
Leer vanished from Stiles’ face and he clenched his jaw. Lydia looked at him affectionately and stepped closer, watching him warily.  
“Yes, he will. But I’m pretty sure Stiles is taking me?” She offered daringly, green eyes meeting brown. From out of nowhere he bent down and scooped her in her arms, lifted her up and squeezed her.  
Lydia and Scott started laughing and Stiles seemed happy with himself. He put her down and she was waiting for an explanation, soft smile playing on her adorable lips, and Stiles spoke lightly.  
“You were totally asking for it. Let’s go.”  
Allison locked the door behind them and they stood outside, waiting for a cab. Scott hugged Allison from behind and put his chin on her shoulder. Both Stiles and Lydia raised their eyes up to the sky, observing a few small stars in the dark sky. The night was beautiful.  
“Don’t tell me you actually liked that Jackson guy.” He stated.  
“Don’t tell me you actually like Malia.” She backfired, but he didn’t seem so affected.  
“Malia was…accidental sex. And she just kinda...stayed around. That’s what it was.”  
Lydia laughed at that, and Stiles tried to understand if it was honest. He has been analyzing this girl way too much, probably, but something very dangerous in his head told him he should keep doing it.  
“Accidental sex. Don’t make me laugh. You make it sound like she slipped and fell on the street and there just happened to be your erection in the way.”  
Stiles gasped at her surprised.  
“Fucking Jesus!” He burst out laughing. “Who even talks like that?” He threw his head back, making Lydia giggle too.  
He didn’t let her answer, when he spoke first, admiration in his eyes mixed with happiness and passion.  
“You have a smart mouth, miss Martin.”  
“You make good observances.”  
“You’re gonna keep surprising me, Bambi?”  
“If you don’t stop speaking shit then probably yes.”  
“Is that a threat?”  
She rolled her eyes, but for the first time it wasn’t affecting, since it was clouded by her pink cheeks and obvious smile, lingering on her pouty lips.  
“That’s a promise.”  
They kept their way to the party fun and easy. Four young souls in California. Lydia rolled her window open and inhaled night air. It was amazing and refreshing, clean and cold.  
They were already too loud and obnoxious in the car, and had already had a night’s energy loaded before they stepped foot in the Oak Creek.  
It was a _party. People were drunk, lonely hearts recklessly confessed their love in the corners, spilled their festering dislikes, had hysterics, marched out. Hot writhing bodies grinded on the dance floor, swaying to the beat._  
“Shots!” Allison yelled.  
“Oh yeah, that’s what we all need.” Scott agreed.  
Guys went to the bar and Allison pulled Lydia to the dance floor. Girls moved seductively, their hair everywhere, and Lydia laughed at the face Allison made when she moved to the music. When the song was over, they joined the boys at the bar. An excessively voluptuous, platinum-blonde was already moving around Stiles, and Allison’s face screwed into revulsion.  
“It’s going to be like that all night, Ally. Just ignore them,” Scott said, nodding at a small group of girls standing a few feet away.  
“It looks like Vegas threw up a flock of vultures,” Allison sneered.  
Stiles turned around from the girl and ordered two beers at the bar, and the blonde bit her puffy, glossed lip and smiled. The bartender popped the tops open and slid the bottles to Stiles. The blonde picked up one of the beers, but Stiles pulled it from her hand.  
“Uhm, not for you.” He said to her and handled the beer to Lydia.  
Her initial thought was to toss it out, but the blonde looked so offended, Lydia smiled and took a sip. She walked away with a huff and Lydia chuckled that Stiles didn’t seem to notice.  
“Like I would buy a beer for some chick at a bar.” He said, shaking his head. Redhead held up her beer, smiling widely, and he pulled one side of his mouth into a half-smile. “You’re different.”  
Lydia stepped closer and clinked her bottle against his. “To being the only girl a guy who doesn’t seem to care or respect who she sleeps with, doesn’t want to sleep with.” She said, taking a swig.  
„Are you serious?“ He asked, pulling the bottle from her mouth. When she didn’t recant, he leaned toward. “I respect you.” He murmured, but loud enough for her to hear it over the bass. “I think of you as an equal, and I respect your brains and all those big words you like to use. But I also wanted to rip your clothes off and have sex with you until you scream and cry and see God. From the first day. Bambi.”  
Something hot rolled over in her stomach. It felt like uneasiness that maybe shared a condo wall with terror. And maybe her arousal lived a couple of doors down.  
She couldn’t hold back the smug smile that crept across her face.  
“You think I’m too good for you.”  
He sneered at her insult. “I can’t think of a single guy I know, that is good enough for you.”  
Her smug melted away and she replaced it with a touched smile.  
“Thanks, Stiles.”  
He took her hand, placing his emptied bottle on the bar.  
“Come on,” He tugged on her hand.  
Lydia laughed and also put the bottle. Stiles was standing close, looking down at her, biting his lip, panting.  
“What are you doing, Stiles? Seriously, I’m filled with alcohol, I’m going to fall.” She giggled loudly.  
He smiled and pulled her closer to him, grabbing her hips.  
“Shut up and dance.”   
Allison and Scott appeared beside them, moving close to one another, completely lost in each other’s breaths.  
Stiles pulled Lydia deeper into the crowd, then his hands moved and curled around her waist, his drunken eyes focused on hers. Coupled with the alcohol in Lydia’s system, when he pulled her body against his, things came to mind that were anything but friendly.  
The next song blend into the one they were dancing to but Stiles showed no signs of wanting to return to the bar. The sweat beaded on the back of Lydia’s neck, and the multi-colored lights made her dizzy. Stiles turned her around, so that her back would be pressed to his front. Feeling nothing but alcohol in her system she closed her eyes and leaned her head against his shoulder. He softly grabbed her hands and pulled them up and around his neck. His hands ran down her arms, down her ribs, finally returning to her hips.  
They swayed to the rhythm, feeling nothing but each other and the music. His hot breath was on her neck, and it was followed by his soft lips against her skin.  
Lydia pulled away from him.  
He chuckled, looking a bit surprised.  
“What, Bambi?”  
Girl just turned around and went back to the bar, ordering another shot. She was too drunk to think, or too mad. Little beast inside of her was a mess, and she didn’t know if she was mad at herself or him. He quickly caught up to her, holding up one finger to bartender, ordering a shot for himself.  
Lydia’s came first and before Stiles could even speak, she drank it all and slammed it down.  
“Jesus, Stiles, that’s not going to assure them we’re not sleeping together! People already talk. Fuck!” She shrieked, her emotions completely lose from too much liquor.  
He frowned, but laughed proximately after that.  
“I don’t give a damn what they think of us.”  
She shot him a dirty look but didn’t say anything.  
“Bambi,” he said, touching her arm. Electricity went through his body at the smallest touch of her now hot skin.  
She pulled away from him and shook her head.  
“Fuck, Stiles, seriously. That was a mistake.”  
He let go of her and stepped back, his dark eyes still locked on hers. Without saying anything else he took his shot angrily and drifted back to the dance floor, walking in not even strides, his body moving in angular movements.  
Lydia leaned her forehead on her fist on the bar, thinking what the hell just happened.  
 _He slid his tongue along the seam of her lips, licking her before he pressed further._  
Everything reminded of her dream so much. She groaned soundlessly and ordered another drink.  
“Hard day?” She heard a voice from behind. Jackson. Of course. Yes. Perfect image for him to see.  
“Uh, hi.” She smiled.  
He smiled back at her, his eyes seemed very sober, at least he was definitely more sober than her.  
“So what’s up, Lydia Martin?” He asked friendly and she almost laughed. She didn’t even know how to answer that question anymore. Bartender saved her, placing her drink on the bar. Jackson eyed her curiously and waited for her to answer.  
“Uhm nothing’s up.” She murmured. “I don’t know you kinda caught me in a very deep… shit. Sorry.”  
He laughed, unaffected and came closer to her.  
“It’s fine actually. You still have that charm. But you look pissed. Wanna talk about it?” He suggested.  
“Not much to talk about.” She smiled nowhere near happily.  
He raised his eyebrows at her, but Lydia counted minutes she could survive without looking at the crowd to look for Stiles. She wanted to leave, but nothing good would ever come out of that. Even her pissed off brain knew it.  
“That’s a nice shade,” Jackson referred to her smile. “Maybe I can try it on later?” He smiled again, but before Lydia could respond, Stiles stepped near her. His shirt was a little damp from the dancing and he looked at Lydia, completely ignoring Jackson.  
“You ready to go, Bambi?”  
“For fuck’s sake, Stiles. I’m talking.” She pushed him away, memory of his lips on her flesh making her fuming again.  
He stretched his arm behind her to grip the bar.  
“Just… Get out of here, Whittermore.”  
Jackson’s eyes darted back and forth between Lydia and Stiles. When he realized Stiles was seriously angry, he smiled apologetically and left.  
“Ready to go now?” He snapped.  
“You are an asshole, Stilinski. Seriously!”  
He shrugged it off, and Lydia passed through him to the door, her emotions taking the best of her. She felt angry that he had kissed her, but she also felt no right to be, with the way she danced with him. She was drunk, that was her only excuse. When she was getting closer to Scott and Allison who were waiting for the cab a little further in the parking lot, Stiles tried to grab her hand but she yanked it away. He wheeled around and she jerked to a stop, leaning back, when he came within a few inches of her face.  
“I should just kiss you and get it over with!” He yelled. “You’re being ridiculous! I kissed your neck, so what?!”  
She could clearly smell the beer on his breath and when she glanced at his lips, he licked them furiously.  
“I’m not your bimbo, Stiles.”  
He shook his head in disbelief.  
“I never said you were! You’re around me twenty-four-seven, you sleep wrapped up in my freaking sheets, but now you’re afraid of what some freshmen are going to think about us?!”  
“What the hell- I came here with you!”  
“Yes! And I have never treated you with anything but respect, Bambi!” He still shouted.  
Lydia stood her ground, trying to keep her eyes higher on his face.  
“No, you just treat me like your property. You had no right to run Jackson off like that!”  
With that she stormed off, but this time he did grab her hand and turned her around on her heels. His tone was still nowhere near calm. Lydia pressed her lips waiting for his outburst.  
“I’ve been drinking, all right? Your skin was three inches from my face, and you’re beautiful, and you smell freaking awesome when you sweat, okay?! I kissed you! I’m sorry! Stop being such a baby and get the fuck over yourself!”  
Lydia was taken aback by his aggression, but as soon as she heard his excuse, corners of her mouth turned up.  
 _“You think I’m beautiful?”_  
He frowned in disgust, locking his eyes on her lips.  
“You’re gorgeous and you know it. What are you smiling about?”  
She shook her head, but her smile just kept spreading. Girl took a step back.  
“Nothing. Let’s go.”  
For a minute he looked at her, studying her smile, adorably formed, with a little accent of drunken green eyes. He laughed, surprising her.  
“Lydia Martin?! You’re a pain in my ass!” Stiles shook his head.  
He came closer and hooked his arm around her neck, smiling his eyes at her smell.  
“You’re making me crazy, you know that?”  
She smiled, feeling a twinge in her chest. She had an almost ravenous urge to grab his face and plant her mouth on his, but she fought against alcohol and hormones raging through her bloodstream.  
“Ugh… Let’s just go home.”


	8. What are we doing?

They stumbled through the door, all four of them laughing and giggling. Both Stiles and Allison needed a little help getting to the living room and then to their bedrooms. Lydia wrapped her one arm around Stiles’ middle to help him to the stairs, but she still couldn’t quite hold him properly. He wore a smug smile on his now a little red lips from the alcohol.  
He kept looking down at her, his eyes investigating every feature that wasn’t blurry for him, then he patiently waited for her to knock her heels off.  
“Stiles…” She rolled her eyes, still having her arm around him, another one ripping off her shoes. When she straightened up Stiles were a little closer now and she almost squeaked. He was barely standing up, so now he was leaning to her with his full body. His hazel eyes were focused on her and Lydia thought he looked adorable, his lips fallen into a pout, his hair more ruffled than it already was, and now he was completely breathing her air.  
Ignoring Allison and Scott running upstairs with a loud laugh, Stiles leaned his forehead against Lydia’s. She could barely react, when he started chuckling at her, and she pulled away from him, when she smelled alcohol on his breath. He reeked of chemicals and sweet cologne. Her gaze slowly moved from his torso to his lips and then his eyes. Their eyes met and lingered there. It was one of those times where time just stopped, just for a few brief seconds, they didn’t hear anything, didn’t see anything else, didn’t listen to giggling of Scott and Allison. Before she could comprehend, he instinctively leaned in to kiss her.  
“Whoa.” She took a step backwards again, receiving a confused and gloomy look from him.  
“Knock it off, Stiles. Come on.”  
She let go off him and started stomping up the stairs. He attempted to follow her, but tripped and fell, rolling onto his back. He started laughing hysterically and it was as if he was laughing with his whole body. Still not moving from the floor he started kicking air from the laughter and grabbed onto his T-shirt to suppress his hands’ movements.  
“What are you doing?! Come on, let’s get to bed.” Lydia took his hand and finally pulled him up to his feet.  
They somehow managed to get upstairs without any more adventures and when Stiles tumbled through the door, he immediately face planted onto his bed and Lydia sighed. She didn’t feel the alcohol rushing through her bloodstream anymore, but for some reason she found it endearing that Stiles was still drunk. He was such a smart mouth with his flirting and confidence, yet he got drunk quicker than her.  
“Come on Stiles. You have to undress.”  
At these words he instantly rolled on his back, tipsy smirk on his face. His T-shirt was rolled up a little bit, revealing his hard abdominal area Lydia tried very much not to focus on.  
He sat up and took her hand in his. Waiting for him to do something, she raised his eyebrows a little bit and then he pulled her to him in a swift movement. Startled by what was happening, she lost her coordination and landed on top of him. Her face was just a few inches away, and suddenly Stiles’ expression got serious. He leaned up, struggling to kiss her again, but once again, she pushed him away. His eyebrows pulled in.  
“Stiles…”  
He held her tight against his chest, until she quit wiggling. She felt a tingle leave her lips, as she looked him in the eye. Their lips were so close, but still not touching. Like he was protecting hers with his own.  
Somehow finding a power in herself, she managed to stand up and he sat up right with her. He was not giving up.  
Lydia reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head in a somewhat slow movement. When he reached for her again, he grabbed his wrist.  
“Let’s just take these clothes off and go to bed okay?”  
“Now that’s what I’m talking about,” he chuckled.  
Lydia sniffed pungent stench in the air.  
“God, Stiles, you reek of Jack Daniels.”  
“Jim Beam,” he corrected with a drunken nod.  
Ignoring him, she kept undressing him, feeling blush spread on her cheeks with every second. She pulled open his belt buckle and yanked it from the loops. Stiles laughed with a jerking movement and lifted his head to her.  
“I suddenly felt an urge to help you off your dress.” He practically purred.  
“Shut up,” she said, unbuttoning his jeans. She slipped them down his hips, his boxers moving with them, so with one hand she pulled them up a little bit, her fingertips tasting his hot skin just above his pelvis. Lydia saw his smooth muscles tense up at her movement and she realized that his breath now was right at her ear. She swallowed and slipped his jeans off his legs. Girl threw the denim on the floor and stood in front of him, hands on her hips.  
Stiles now sat peacefully, his both eyes closed, his breathing steady and even. His shoulders were down and his hands settled in his lap.  
Lydia realized he had passed out.  
She took a deep breath and walked over to the closet, shaking her head as she riffled through their clothes. Girl unzipped her dress and shoved it down over her hips, letting it fall to her ankles. She stopped for a second just to make sure Stiles was still breathing evenly. She kicked the dress to the corner and ran her fingers through her straw-blonde locks.  
The closet was bursting with his clothes and hers, and she puffed, blowing her hair from her face, as she searched through the mess for a T-shirt. As she pulled on one hanger, she almost yelped, feeling Stiles slam into her back, and wrap his hands around his waist.  
“You scared the shit outta me!” Lydia complained.  
He slowly turned her around to face him, and she felt how his movements were slow and deliberate. She closed her eyes for a second, when he pulled her closer against him and buried his face in her hair, nuzzling her neck.  
Feeling his bare skin against hers, it took her a moment to protest.  
“You’re still drunk, Stiles…” she whispered.  
Raven haired boy turned to face the strawberry hair beauty, and then he pressed against her, leaning her back against the wall. Their eyes met and Lydia could see ache in his expression, as he scanned bare pieces of her skin. He didn’t want to conquer her. He wanted her to say yes.  
He leaned in to kiss her, stopping just an inch away. His soft fingers slid down her waist, to her hips, and she completely lost her ability to speak, to say something in order to stop him.  
“Tell me not to kiss you.” He pleaded softly, and his lips were a breath away from hers.  
“You’re drunk. And you’re… you’re not allowed to say this.” She barely got the words out, every syllable shadowing his wet lips.  
He shook his head, his messy hair brushing her forehead slightly, as his fingers were digging deeper into her skin.  
“No, Lydia. I’m allowed to say what I want. What I’m not allowed, is to do what I want.”  
Stiles slightly tilted his face and looked at her lips. Every part of her body was on flames, and she thought maybe she had finally understood the meaning of a saying “like a moth to the flame”.   
He lifted up his right hand and he caressed her jaw, then his electrifying fingers settled on the pulse on her throat.  
“Tell me not to kiss you,” he repeated, hardly making a sound, breathing her air, as his lips hovered on hers.  
“Don’t kiss me,” she told him, her voice a breathless rasp.  
“ _Mean it._ Either you say yes, Bambi, or you say no.”  
She couldn’t find her words. She didn’t even what she would say. She just looked him in the eye, and he looked at her with absolute admiration. Everything just stopped for a second, and lack of oxygen in her lungs made it pretty clear what she was craving. A quiet moan escaped from his throat and he pressed his pelvis against her, making her feel how much he wanted her through his boxers.  
Everything in her body told her to kiss him. She felt like burning. Just when she was ready to do something she knew she would regret later, he spoke again.  
“ _Okay._ ” He said, his lips leaving hers, as he stepped back and without readable expression on his face he fell onto the bed again.  
Lydia stood in the corner of the dark room, her lips parted, her breathing deep and slow. She crossed her hands on her stomach and watched his chest rise up and down. When she was thoroughly persuaded that he was actually sleeping she swallowed and pulled the T-shirt over her head and went to the bathroom.  
As she was cleaning her makeup, she thought about what had just happened. She almost kissed Stiles. And he almost kissed her. She felt so frustrated, she was sure that getting into bed with him right now… It made her think she couldn’t quite restrain him or herself. Lydia shook her head and made her way downstairs.  
She hurried to the recliner and collapsed into it, burying her face in her hands. She could feel hormones rushing all the way through her body and she licked her lips thinking of the boy upstairs.  
Allison said that it was just a matter of time, but still, Lydia didn’t like the idea of hook up. She wasn’t even sure she wanted to be with him. He was such a reminder of her past. The drinking, the flirting, sleeping, everything about him was like an alarm clock, the reason why she had left the small town behind. The reason why she had left her old habits behind. Like he was a version of her-past-self.  
With that thought she rolled herself into a small ball, bringing her knees to her chest. Still wearing a frown on her pretty face, she calmly waited for sleep to take her over.  
The next morning, Lydia poured orange juice into a tall glass, and took a sip as she bobbed her head to the music playing from her iPod. She had woken up just before the sun and after that she decided to clean up the kitchen to pass the time, until her less ambitious roommates awoke. Girl loaded the dishwasher and swept and mopped, and the wiped the counters down. When the kitchen was sparkling, she grabbed the basket of clean clothes and sat on the couch, folding, until there were a dozen or more piles surrounding her.  
Murmuring came from Scott’s room. Allison giggled and then it was quiet for about a minute, until Lydia heard noises that made her feel a little uncomfortable sitting alone in the living room.  
She rushed to Stiles’ room and smiled, when she saw that he hadn’t moved from the way she left him last night. Considering whether or not to do it, she walked over to him and pulled the blanket off, laughing as he groaned.  
“No, Bambi…” he said, mumbling something before his breathing returned to slow and deep.  
She couldn’t help but watch him sleep. Seeing him this still and calm sent a thrill through her veins that she couldn’t explain. Stiles lay silently, so Lydia went to take a shower, hoping someone would come over and quiet Scott and Allison’s moans and creaking of the bed. When she turned off the water, she realized they weren’t so worried about who could hear.  
Later she stomped down the stairs to the kitchen and the happy couple entered it in about five minutes. They both looked tired but satisfied, mild smiles on their faces. They walked in holding hands and Scott smiled to Lydia. She couldn’t help but wink at him and he snorted.  
Stiles showed up from around the corner, looking a bit beat up. Lydia felt something squirm in her stomach but ignored it and waited for him to speak, or make any kind of sign he remembered last night.  
“You guys are loud as fuck,” he groaned at Scott and Allison, buttoning his jeans.  
Their moment in the bedroom crept into Lydia’s mind and she couldn’t seem to look him in the eyes. Stiles, on the other hand, seemed to have no problem casually checking her out, and he rubbed his eyes, taking her glass of the juice.  
“Who the hell let me drink that much last night?”  
Scott sneered at his best friend.  
“You did. You took someone’s bottle of Jim Beam and drank it all the way through when you were dancing with that girl, when Lydia was talking to Jackson.”  
“Damn,” he said, shaking his head, but his eyebrows pulled in. “Did you have fun?” He asked Lydia.  
“Are you serious?!” She asked, showing her anger before thinking.  
Stiles’ eyes unfocused, scanning his memories of the night before. Lydia worked to stifle her temper. If he didn’t remember the club, then he certainly didn’t remember almost sleeping with her later.  
“You interrupted their conversation and pulled her away from him. And I’m pretty sure you threatened him, after he attempted to flirt with her.” Allison laughed.  
He winced and Lydia couldn’t comprehend if he was remembering something, or if it was him looking guilty.  
“How pissed are you?” He tested.  
“Pretty pissed.”  
Lydia felt angrier that what she felt right now had nothing to do with Jackson. She tightened her robe and clumped upstairs. Stiles’ footsteps were right behind her.  
“ _Bambi,_ ” he said, catching the door when she shut it in his face. He slowly pushed it open and stood in front of her, examining her expression. He couldn’t quite read it but she didn’t seem so pissed, as she looked sad.  
“Do you remember anything you said to me last night?” She asked.  
He shook his head, his hazel eyes suddenly filed with worry.  
“No. Why? Was I mean to you?!”  
“Ugh you were not mean to me…! I….”  
She groaned and covered her eyes with her hands, and froze when she felt Stiles’ hands on her wrists.  
“What happened, Bambi?” He asked quietly and she lifted her eyes to him. He rested a hand on her hip, and her whole body tensed up, this movement already familiar to her. She looked at him with pleading eyes and pouted.  
“Nothing happened…”  
Stiles’ jaw tensed at her words and he took a deep breath, blowing it out from his nose.  
“Okay. I’ll let you get dressed.” He said quietly.  
When he reached for the door knob, he paused, rubbing his arm. As soon as his finger touched the tender splatter of purple pooling under his skin, he pulled up his elbow and noticed the bruise. He started at it for a moment, then turned to her. She was standing in the same position, her eyes focused on him.  
“I fell on the stairs…” He started, sifting through the blurry images in his mind.  
Lydia’s heart was pounding and she swallowed hard, as she watched his realization strike. His eyes narrowed and the popped out.  
“We…”  
Lydia shook her head at him, denying his thoughts and his expression went from serious to hopeless.  
“What the fuck are you doing to me, Bambi?! I can’t think straight when I’m around you.”  
He ran a hand through his hair as he tried to calm his racing heart. He looked at her and shook his head slowly, trying to understand what was happening to him.  
He wanted her on the most basic level that a man could want a woman, but somehow it was so much more than that. It wasn’t just about sex and the need to be inside of her, it was all the other stuff too.  
“You… What the hell, Bambi?”  
It seems like hours pass, both of them just staring into each other’s eyes. He has no idea what she sees, that holds her, but he can’t look away either.  
“Bambi... Lydia.” He tried. “I don’t recall you saying no.”  
She took a step forward, ready to argue that irrelevant little fact, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. He was right. She just sighed and shrugged.  
“What do you want me to say, Stiles?”  
His accusatory expression got all the way down to her stomach. He walked over to her.  
“You were hoping I wouldn’t remember?”  
“No! I was pissed that you forgot!”  
His brown eyes bored into hers and he stepped even closer, purposely making her flustered.  
“Why?”  
“I… If we would have… And you didn’t… I don’t know why, okay?! I just was!”  
He moved his head closer to hers and then stopped, his lips a few millimeters away from hers. She couldn’t breathe, her heart was sprinting, but not from the anger. His hands touched each side of her face and he scanned her eyes.  
“What are we doing, Bambi?”  
Lydia’s green eyes began at his belt and the rose over the muscles on his stomach and chest, finally settling on the warm brown of his irises.  
“ _You tell me.”_


	9. I need him/her

“Lydia?” Scott said, knocking on the door of Stiles’ bedroom.   
“Motherfucker…” Stiles whispered angrily, irritated for being interrupted.  
“Allison is asking for you?”   
Lydia blinked a few times and took a deep breath. She still looked up at him through her eyelashes.  
Before she could respond to Scott, Stiles murmured to her lips.  
“Bambi?”   
He didn’t take his gaze off of her, he didn’t even blink. Lydia felt tickle leave her lips but she couldn’t move. She didn’t care that his best friend was right outside, she didn’t care that he was bad news. All she cared about… was him.   
“Lydia?” Scott asked again.  
“Yeah, be with you in a sec…” She answered to the door as casually as she could possibly pretend to be.   
When they heard Scott walking away, they both woke up. It took everything Stiles had to step away, dropping his hands from her face. She closed her lips which were a little red and parted.   
He ran his fingers through his hair considering just pushing his lips against her. Raw, hard. He wanted her so badly, he couldn’t even see straight, he couldn’t even think straight. He was sure, that this was what people meant when they said “going crazy”.   
Boy shook his head and looked at her.   
“I’ll let you get dressed.” He said quietly and glanced at her for the last time before moving to the door.   
She watched step away and grab the door knob, when he stopped, his bare back still turned her. He was facing the door but to Lydia, it looked like he was looking down.   
“I have no idea what we’re doing here, Lydia. But I’m going nuts.”   
He left the room after that. She swallowed and brought her hand to her eyes, the other one on her hip.   
He was right. Neither of them could comprehend what was going on between them. But it was dangerous.  
***  
They didn’t talk about the incident in their room, or the club for a couple of weeks. Things were slowly changing for them, but they refused to talk about it, saying they were just friends, about five times a day.   
Stiles and Lydia studied together, they still slept together, watched movies… They were together. Yet…they weren’t.   
Jackson texted Lydia about four times, and Stiles cringed every time she texted him back. He found it torturing. She was near him every day, and literally every night. When he woke up, he would smell her hair, he could hear her breathing.  
He was almost ripping his hair off, every time he simply thought of her being with another guy. He was completely out of control. Because of her. She consumed him to the point where his brain stopped functioning entirely.   
Stiles couldn’t name it. He had no idea what was it that he felt, but it was getting hard. And it was horrible, and it was vulnerable. She was the only thing in his life that didn’t actually feel that pointless.   
He started talking to Scott. At least, he tried. It was hard to tell someone about a thing he couldn’t quite name. First times it was just stuttering and then it was lot of cursing. Scott eyed him carefully, listening Stiles rant about Lydia and strawberries, and caramel. When he finally stopped pacing around the room and asked Scott if he understood what he meant, looking at him with hopeful eyes, Scott frowned and asked him if he himself understands what he had just said. Stiles shook his head in defeat and closed his eyes.   
But then the world around him would calm down. He would calm down. Because Lydia would ask him if he was okay, scanning his overwhelmed dark eyes. He would nod, smiling to her. The girl would look at him for a moment just to make sure that he was okay, then she would wrap her hands around his middle to make him feel better.  
Still hugging her, he would wonder… If she looked at him as a friend, or maybe… Did she feel the same way about him? Lydia always made comments about his one night stands, laughing about them with insincere giggle, and he always smiled to her, wanting to tell her that he didn’t give a shit about them. He didn’t want them, he didn’t want nights with them. He didn’t want anybody else. He wanted her.  
Only one person in the apartment seemed to understand what he was going through.  
“Sure, it’s obvious.” Allison winked at him, when he started.  
She asked him what was the problem if he wanted to date Lydia. He immediately started shaking his head, muttering noes. When the raven haired girl asked him what he meant, he told her that he didn’t want to date her. He just wanted to be with her. He wanted to see her, every day. He told her that he started missing her when she wasn’t around him, he spilled to her that he feels like aggressively punching any guy who flirted with her, that it made him feel sick to his stomach every time he thought about them leaving Stiles and Scott, when the boilers would get fixed.   
Allison listened carefully, soft smile playing on her lips. She nodded at some things he said and then finally got up from the recliner in the living room. She stood in front of him and grabbed both of his shoulders, shaking him slightly.  
“Wake up!” She laughed. “What you just described was… Well it was something, Stiles.”   
Stiles looked at her, like a little boy waiting for comfort.   
“So, you have feelings for her. What’s the worst that could happen if you told her about it?”   
He snorted.   
“She could actually respond to that.”  
Her eyebrows pulled in.  
“I don’t get it. Why would that be bad?”   
The boy wiggled uncomfortably, editing the words in his mind, but when that didn’t work, he just blustered everything he wanted in the first place.  
“Is it… ever a good idea to let anyone in? The only woman I ever cared about, uhm… died when I was nine. And this, this, what Lydia is making me feel. It terrifies me, okay? And there are just… so many things against us. She’s innocent and she’s amazing and…”  
“She’s not that innocent, Stiles.” Allison said sadly. “Maybe an asshole like you is just what she needs?”   
She squeezed his shoulders reassuringly and turned to the door.  
“You know…” She started gloomily, tilting her head in consideration of her own words. “You should stop thinking that… she’s too good for you, or that you’re gonna damage her, or that,” she shrugged. “Or that it’s not a good idea to let someone in. You can let her in, you know? This feeling you get, when you’re with her? It’s good. You don’t have to be afraid of that. And by the way… She has the same attitude as you. Maybe that’s why you’re closer to her type than you think. By the way I never thought I’d see Stiles Stilinski… startled or not confident, for once. So that really is something, huh? You’re not such a bad guy, Stiles. Believe me.” Allison smiled to him last time and left the room.  
It didn’t quite get better after their conversation. But it was supposed to get worse before getting better, right?   
One Saturday morning Lydia plopped on the couch beside him. She threw her bare legs on top of his and he beamed down to her.  
“I’m so tired you have no idea.” She complained leaning her head against his shoulder.  
“Why?”   
“I didn’t get sleep at all last night.”   
“Why?!”  
She shrugged.  
“Don’t know. Just couldn’t sleep.” She yawned.   
He ran his fingers down her leg, tickling it. It rapidly sent shivers to her spine, and earthquakes in her lower stomach. She bit her lip, but didn’t lift her eyes.   
“Why didn’t you wake me?” Stiles asked.  
She chuckled.   
“Just because I don’t sleep doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. By the way.. Uhm, I tend to… I don’t know, save your sleep, I guess?” She added shyly and he smiled, happy that her eyes were on his chest and not on his face.   
Allison and Scott walked into the room and both smiled to one another, seeing the image on the couch.   
“C’mon, let’s watch it.”   
Stiles and Lydia were staring at the screen, not really watching the movie, just observing colors and movements. She felt his hand moving very slowly. It gently enfolded around her waist, accidentally touching uncovered spot above her hip bone, where his fingers eventually rested. He started painting little circles and figures, tracing lines, like constellations. Not really platonically. _It drove her crazy._  
Her head was on his shoulder, and it was tilted in a way, that every breath she took stayed on his neck. She wanted to place soft pepper kisses all the way starting from his jawline to his neck. She thought how it would feel if he would enfold her in his arms right now, and she involuntarily licked her lips.  
Feeling a little dazed she excused from his embrace and rushed upstairs to calm herself before doing something stupid, like planting her mouth on his in the middle of watching, with Allison and Scott next to them.  
Allison followed her immediately, seeing how something was wrong.   
“Lydia? Babe?”   
She found her laying on Stiles’ bed, just staring at the ceiling.   
“You okay?” She closed the door and leaned against it.   
Her best friend shook her head.  
“Nope, I’m not.”   
“What’s wrong?”   
“Stiles.”  
Ally hid her smile.  
“And what’s with him?”  
Lydia sat up and groaned.  
“I just… I’m going to do something very stupid very soon. He’s driving me crazy, I swear to God. I’m frustrated.” She sighed.  
“Sexually?” Her friend asked bluntly, with a chuckle.  
 _“Allison!”_  
“Oh come on.” She rolled her eyes. “It obvious you have feelings for him.”  
“I don’t.”   
“Why the hell do you say that? It’s crystal clear!”   
“Gah, why do you keep pushing it, Allison? You know he’s not good for me, and I’m not good for him. And I’m probably just… Yes, he probably wants to sleep with me, but that’s it? It’s Stiles.”  
“Oh my God, how are you both this stupid, huh? What the fuck?”   
Scott burst in to the room, almost making Allison fall down on her knees. She stumbled and raised her eyebrows.   
“Sorry, baby.” He apologized. “Seriously, I left a… completely confused Stiles downstairs. What’s going on?”  
Allison put her hands on her hips, shaking her head.   
“They are both idiots, that’s what.”   
“I don’t have feelings for Stiles.” Lydia repeated through clenched teeth.   
“Oh, come on, Lydia.” Scott said. “You just sat there, wrapped in his arms, and even if I’m the guy, it’s so obvious, you have no idea.”   
She didn’t respond to that, and even Allison didn’t say anything. Eventually Scott spoke again.  
“What are you so afraid of?”   
Lydia shook her head at his dramatic question and didn’t answer. Scott just shrugged and quietly left the room.  
“If you two would just talk…” Allison started.   
“Allison!” Lydia shrieked. “Just stop it! I overheard you two the other day, okay? He doesn’t want to date me. And that’s okay! Just stop pushing it, okay?! Jesus!”  
Her friend listened to her with wide eyes, and put her palms together as if she was praying.  
“Is that why you deny it? Because he said he didn’t want to date you?”  
“No…”  
“Lydia you heard like… One percent of the conversation okay?! You both have feelings for each other.”  
“Allison.”  
“Just listen to me okay? He’s not that bad, and he really cares about you! It is exhausting,” she emphasized. “listening to you denying your feelings for him, saying that Jackson is asking you out, and then turning around and hugging Stiles, being with him, and leading him on!”   
“I’m not leading him on!”   
“Lydia if you would just give him a chance! You’re not making any sense here, okay? You’re not being reasonable. I know you’re afraid of relationship since Jordan but… It’s been obvious since the first time you guys met…”  
“No, Allison!” Lydia cut her off angrily. “That’s not what that was. I am not the kind of girl you just falls for the first boy she meets at the party and suddenly that’s it, let the love story begins!” She shouted and that shut Allison up.   
Her friend looked Lydia in the eye and furrowed her eyebrows. She shot her a sad smile and nodded.  
“And… I am, right? That’s what you really think of me and Scott?”   
Blonde immediately regretted saying it. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath attempting to calm down.  
“Ally, that’s not what I meant.”  
Allison laughed humorlessly, crossing her hands on her chest.  
“It is, isn’t it? That’s what you really think? That we’re not gonna last, that we’re just messing around?” She asked bitterly.   
Lydia opened her mouth to apologize, but Allison left the room.   
“For the love of God…” Lydia muttered and covered her eyes with her palms.   
She really was going crazy. It just flew out of her mouth and she was angry and upset. But she knew Allison, she knew she would have to give her time. She started thinking about her words, though.   
Allison thinks Lydia is leading him on.  
Is she?  
At that moment, Lydia wished she could just tell him how she may be going out with Jackson because of him. Because she’s afraid of him. Because there’s an actual possibility of her actually caring about him and that startled her to the core.   
Girl brought her hair up to a messy bun and laid back on the mattress. She brought her knees up to her chest and laid down on her side, turning back to the door. She hated feeling like this.   
And every time he touches her with his fingers it’s like he burns holes in her skin. And every time he whispers her “Goodnight” in her ear, his soft lips mildly brushes her skin. He leaves every warm breath on her, causing her to dream… Images so sweet and frustrating. And she looks at him, and she’s not sure he is looking at her…   
“You okay Bambi?”   
Lydia didn’t hear him come in, but she didn’t turn to him. She sighed.  
“I guess.”   
The traitor in her chest started pounding like crazy, as she felt him climb on the bed. She didn’t say anything, just waited for him to say something, or to act. Lydia felt him stop for a second, as if he was not sure what he was supposed to do, but then he positioned himself right behind her, placing his head on her pillow.   
His soft fingers started at her ribcages, then he wrapped his hand around her middle, pushing her back closer to his front. She closed her eyes, when his fingertips touched her stomach, rolling her T-shirt a little up.   
Girl involuntarily pressed closer to him, and he started pouring his words to her ear.  
“You’re awfully nervous lately, Bambi… And since when do you and Allison fight?”   
She rolled her eyes and answered quietly.  
“Well of course we fight… That’s normal.”   
He exhaled in her hair.  
“Well yeah but… What were you guys fighting about anyway?”   
Lydia froze. What was she supposed to tell him? He felt her tense and he enveloped her a little tighter.   
“I don’t know, lot of things…” She lied. “She said something about me being a hypocrite; she said something about Jackson…”  
His reaction was immediate and he moved quicker than a cat. He freed himself away from her and groaned from irritation. Stiles rolled on his back and rubbed his eyes.  
“Then I agree with Allison.”   
Lydia stood up from the bed and faced him.  
“For the love of God.”  
“You don’t even know him.” He muttered angrily, scrunching his jaw.   
“He’s just a guy. Normal guy, okay?” She sounded just as annoyed.  
“He’s an asshole.” Stiles stated, also standing up.  
 _“Well that’s ironic.”_  
“What?!”   
“Jesus!” Lydia yelped. “He’s just a guy, I’m not marrying him, as far as I know. How does he bother you so much?!”   
He opened his mouth to backfire to her, but stopped. Aggressively licking her lips, Lydia waited for his response.  
“You know why, Lydia.”   
“Enlighten me, Stiles.” She crossed her hands on her chest and he shot her a fuming look.  
“Oh c’mon. That guy is bad news, okay? I would rather cut my arm off than let him anywhere near you.”   
“Well at least he goes for what he wants!”   
Her words shattered something in him and before she knows it, he rushes to her and presses her against the wall, his body crushing hers. His eyes are dark and fiery, like a storm ready to unleash itself.   
“Get off me.” Lydia seethed, pounding her small fists to his chest.   
“You have no right to say that, Bambi.” He released her, still standing close and she wanted to kiss him then, more than ever. She was mad, and boy, he was angry too.  
 _She needed to press her pink lips strongly against his and she wanted for him to make her feel fire in her chest. She knew he could make her toes curl._  
“You can’t even say it.” Stiles boiled. “You can’t even name what we’re doing, or simply say how you feel about me. All you have is denial, Lydia. That’s it.”   
He swallowed and looked away, his breathing slowing. Lydia noted that he looked very pale and his madness was mixed with blues.   
Before she could open her mouth he grabbed her hips and brought his face down to hers.   
Lydia suddenly felt his look stabbing her chest with cold blades and he started speaking, barely touching her lips. He was seriously livid.   
“You know, respecting me and yourself you should stop pretending that you don’t feel anything for me. I don’t care that it’s just damn sexual attraction. Just for fuck’s sake, take some responsibility for yourself. You think I don’t see your body language, or the way you react to me? Sure, it’s all fun and games, but how long am I gonna be the sad-sack, moping around for you? Whatever you’ll say, I’ll get over it, I’m a big boy, just fucking say it.” He stepped away leaving her breathless. “Just have some pride and stop pretending that this, between us is one sided, because it’s getting fucking exhausting.”  
With that he walked away and loudly shut the door, leaving Lydia alone.


	10. Plan

_Just have some pride and stop pretending that this, between us is one sided, because it’s getting fucking exhausting._  
Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
I internally groaned. Great move, dumbass.   
It’s been about two hours since I so shamelessly yelled at that beautiful girl, who was making my insides turn and dance and it was everything - best and worst you could ask for.   
As far as I heard, she didn’t leave the room either, just like I haven’t left the couch. I was basically just staring at the black screen, barely seeing my own reflection. That minute I was super grateful for having a quite bigger apartment. Less possibilities of bumping into each other.  
At the time it seemed like a really smart thing to do, you know, just jump at her throat for… Yes, so what exactly did I roar at her for?   
I rubbed my eyes and let my head fall comfortably on the headrest. I got mad because she couldn’t name feelings for me? Or because she wouldn’t admit they were… there?  
Lydia Martin was turning me into a psycho man. She made me question everything I’ve been doing… for a while now. How? Nothing made sense anymore. Every rule I’ve ever made was getting broken one by one.   
I’m a pussy. No… worse. I’m Scott.   
Did she fall asleep? Was she still mad? Was she sad? Was she crying?   
My hands curled into fists unwillingly, and I shook that thought away. No. Please don’t be crying. I replayed our fight again and again and again in my head. I knew I was probably right. I was right about confronting her. But why did I have to fucking yell, dammit.   
Ugh. My temper. Jesus. She probably won’t put up with me for any longer. And she’s going to leave. I swallowed at that though. I didn’t want her to leave. I wanted her to stay. Everything was so much better when Bambi was around. And now my Bambi probably hates me. Or does she?  
She was so amazing. She was kind. And she wasn’t like bimbo-hot-girl. She wasn’t that kind of sexy. She was tingly and high in your chest and warm sexy… And she didn’t mind staying around an ass like me. I wanted to just… wrap my hands around her small waist and I wanted to tangle my fingers in her hair. For the first time in my life I really wanted that. I needed that.   
My head was about to explode with unanswered questions, but just as I was about to close my eyes, Scott appeared on the stairs.   
“You okay dude?” He asked, but I just shrugged. I wasn’t okay. I was terrified and I was lost. She had brought this weird side of me I didn’t know I had.  
Scott walked over to me and sat beside. He looked at me intensely, expecting me to talk. My eyes drifted to the stairs.  
“I don’t know Scott. I don’t know if I’m okay, or if she’s okay. And I don’t know what the fuck is this feeling in my chest or any of it.” I murmured with all honesty and looked to my best friend.   
Bastard was smiling.  
“Is my misery amusing to you?” I slapped his chest playfully.   
He chuckled, but then his expression got serious again.  
“You really feel this way about her?”  
I groaned again and stood up impatiently.   
“I just… Feel about her okay?”  
He raised his eyebrows, scanning my mien.  
“Yeah but. You just yelled at her, like screamed…” I rolled my eyes. “…for not telling you how she feels about you. Right? But you can’t even get the words out when talking to me.”  
“Because I’ve never felt like this before!” I answered to him in exaggerated sigh.   
“Say it.”  
“Say what?”  
“How you feel about her. Do you like her? Does Stiles Stilinski finally like someone?” He wiggled his eyebrows, finding my gloom entertaining.   
“Fuck off, Scott.”  
“Just tell me you like her out loud and it will be better immediately.”  
“Fine.”  
“Fine.” He laughed, still waiting for my answer. Maybe the reason I found it hard or irritating was because I didn’t want to jinx it. I took a breath and put my hands on my hips.  
“I like her.” I managed, through clenched teeth.  
He made a funny face at me. He was such a funny puppy I almost broke a smile.  
“Not good enough.”   
“Okay, I really like her.”  
“Stiles.”  
“ _Scott._ ” I mimicked mockingly.   
“Jesus, just spit it out, will you?”  
“Fine, I like her, I hate it when she’s not around, I can’t stand her being mad at me and I think she is the smartest woman I’ve ever met. Happy?”   
My best bro smiled at me again and stood up to leave the room.  
“For now, yes.”  
I rolled my eyes at him but just before he reached the stairs I called his name.  
“Hm?” He asked in response.   
“I’ll be at my dad’s.” I said, and he raised his eyebrows. I didn’t quite know why I just spontaneously thought of going there, but I really wanted to see Papa. I missed him. I missed talking to him. I missed the way he talked sense into me. Maybe he would tell me what the hell I should do about Lydia.   
I left, taking the keys of my Jeep and I inhaled the sweet sweet air of the evening. It was such a beautiful day. And all I could think of…  
Was her.   
I felt infected. I felt like it was a disease, she was simply in me. Ugh, I was screwed. Hence, she was too.   
**  
“Stiles?” He answered the door, visible light in his eyes.  
“Hi, dad.” I smiled. He let me through and I stepped in receiving a firm hug. Wow, it’s really been awhile. When we pulled back, he kept his arms on my shoulders, looking at me lovingly.   
“Come on.”   
We walked to the kitchen together and I took a seat near the table. He started talking and rambling about everything he could and I relaxed at his voice. My dad. My dad would know what to do. I rested my chin at my palm and watched him turn around in the kitchen, making coffee and smiling.   
“How’s Melissa?” I asked, cutting him off.  
A little blush crept on his face and he smiled softly, making wrinkles around his cheeks. Somehow pops looked younger than he was. His eyes was sparkly and sides of my mouth turned up. _I wondered if I will ever love someone as much as he loves her._  
“She’s great, actually. She misses you, though. You don’t seem to call her very often, huh?” He teased and I knew he was also talking about himself.   
My arm dropped from my face and I stood up, walking to the fridge. I pretended to play with magnets, when I heard him go to the living room, and I followed him. He was already sitting in his favorite armchair, examining my face.   
“What’s up Stiles?” He asked.  
“Sorry, I didn’t call you.” I said justly. “I’ve been a little busier lately.”   
“Uhuh,” he murmured and took a sip of his coffee. I started walking forwards and backwards, preparing myself for telling him what was bothering me. I remember this day… when I made a note to the man in front of me. I stated that he will never hear me talk about any kind of romance. I told him I only loved one woman in my entire life and that I would never let anyone make me feel vulnerable. He just eyed me funnily and told me to remember that when I do.  
“What is it, Stiles? Come on, just tell me.”   
I scratched the back of my neck, but his deep enduring eyes told me to sit down.   
I sighed as he kept watching me, patiently, then I stopped pacing around the room and sat irritably on the couch.   
“Oh God…” I murmured under my breath, but I was kinda in this with both feet now. “So there’s this girl.”  
He nodded understandingly, and his soft smile reminded me of mum just a bit.  
“Uhm… She kinda hates me?” I continued in a strained voice.   
“And you…?” He raised his eyebrows. “What, you’re falling for her, kid?”   
I rolled my eyes at his words, beginning to question this idea.   
“No! No way. I don’t… I don’t know. I mean.” I could see he was biting back a smirk. Little bastard was enjoying it. Why was everyone enjoying this?! “Jesus. How do you know?”  
He put his strong hand on my shoulder, before stating the obvious.  
“You know you’re in deep, when you come to your old man just to talk about her. Because you don’t know what else you can do, kiddo.”   
I looked at him and sighed. Maybe he was right. Maybe I really was too deep. But I had no idea what the hell I was supposed to do about it. I wanted Bambi near me, but at the same time I wanted her to have better.   
“So, what do you plan on doing?” He asked my questions aloud.  
I shook my head. Hah. Really?  
“I have no idea. We just had a fight and I yelled at her. And it was… it wasn’t pretty. I don’t know, dad. I just want to be around her all the time. And she is such a fantastic girl. You have no idea. She doesn’t feel pointless. She’s real, and she’s beautiful and… Damn it.” I finished and only then I realized I’ve been talking in almost a whisper.  
My dad smiled warmly at me and nodded.   
“Go get her. And don’t stop until you get her. Okay?” He winked playfully and I laughed.  
“Okay, this is getting too weird and too drama!” I chuckled.  
I stayed at him until about nine p.m. Unfortunately, Melissa was still on her shift, and I was really tired after the day. I wanted to go home, face plant my pillow and just sleep it off… I wanted to see Lydia. I was nervous to meet her rage or sadness or ignorance, or whatever she was feeling about me right now. But I wanted to see her. I wanted. Really really much.  
Just before I left, dad stopped me.  
“Hey, Stiles, remember Theo?”  
I frowned at that name. Of course I remembered him. Not that I wanted to. I seriously hated that guy in high school.   
“Yeah, what about him?”   
“Well, uhm…” He scratched the back of his neck, sensing my irritation. “He’s coming to Berkeley next week. With some program, from his own university. Exchange program. His mother called me.”  
“Seriously?” I made a disgusted face. Greaaat. That was exactly what I needed.  
“I was wondering if he could stay with you for like a week?”   
“Nope!”  
“Stiles?”  
“No, dad, I hate him!” I nodded spastically.   
“You hated him in high school,” He rolled his eyes, and I made a turn to leave. “Certainly, you’ve grown up of that.”   
“Talk to you later dad! Bye!”  
I quickly left his place. No way I would let him stay with me. I’d probably throw him away at some point anyway. Jesus Christ, I hated that guy so much! I hated him around Scott, and around me, and I hated his smug smile when he pretended to be an actual good guy. I really didn’t need a Theo at my house. I was already living with someone who annoyed me at the same level. The only difference was that as much as the person annoyed me, I felt the same amount of affection, and probably even more. And another difference was that I probably would never want to press my lips against Theo’s.   
When I drove to the apartment, I noticed that Scott’s motorcycle was gone. So either he just took off somewhere, or he was with Allison. Which would mean me and Lydia were alone for the evening. My stupid mind and body were both thinking things that would end more than friendly.   
But I had to shake it away. I had a plan. And I wasn’t going to waste. I had to.   
So I slowly stepped away and calmly walked to the door. When I was inside, I noticed the first floor was empty, but there was a small light coming from downstairs.   
I swallowed involuntarily and took a breath. Okay okay okay. Relax dammit.   
I made my way upstairs and saw that the light was definitely coming from my room. So, hi Lydia, I guess. Ugh. Calm the fuck down. Before I could reach the door she tore it open, taking me off guard.  
She stood there in her cute pajamas, her big eyes wary and confused. Her beautiful wavy hair hung loose on her back, and she crossed her arms at the sight of me. God, she was so adorable, it was really a torture.   
“I thought I heard someone walking.” She bit her lip.  
I nodded at her, mentally thanking for her calm voice tone. I didn’t want to fight with her. I stepped closer, hoping she would go back to the room, but she didn’t move. Lydia kept staring at me, her full bottom lip still between her teeth. I was so sure it would be just as comfortable between mine.   
“Wanna go to the room?” I offered. At that she woke up, and nodded, furrowing her eyebrows.   
I followed Lydia to my own room and closed the door. She turned around to me and started talking. I was so damn glad she did.   
“Okay, so, hm, that.” She started and coughed. Huh, it was just as hard for her as it was for me? I stepped closer to her without second thought. She watched me softly, as I ripped off my jacket and dropped it on my bed.   
Her look made me melt and I never wanted to lose the way she made me feel.   
“I don’t want to fight with you, okay?” She blurted out and I smiled widely.   
“Okay.” I simply said.   
So I walked up to her, not lowering my gaze from her face. I felt so drawn to her, my hands just found their way to her waist.   
Lion in side of me roared in victory, when she put her arms on my chest and looked up to me, smirking. My own smile mirrored my mood.   
She clung harder to my embrace, and I held her with all the afflictions of a man torn by affection. What a miracle she was... In that moment I did not care why we fought, that we fought, if only it would end and I could be with her. I would accept the whole responsibility of defeat if I had to, if only it meant to have my arms around her at all times.   
I just wanted her. Needed her. As simply and clearly as one needs food and oxygen and light, I needed her in my life.  
I felt her shiver, as I lowered my head to her neck. I didn’t kiss her, I knew better than that. If I really wanted to be with her, I shouldn’t push her too hard. I should give her time. And as much as this feeling terrified me, I wanted her with me.  
“Stiles…” She whispered my name like a sin, but my mouth stayed near her neck, leaving my every breath on her warm skin.  
“I’m not kissing you.” I murmured back in a husky voice, brushing the tip of my nose on her jaw now, making her shudder.  
She touched my face and brought it to her face level. Feeling of her soft skin made my breath hitch like crazy and I’ve never wanted to kiss a girl that much in my life.   
She licked her lips only making it worse and I strained myself from planting my mouth on hers.   
“We should go to sleep.” I said, closing my eyes.   
“Okay.” She said softly and tried to pull away, but my hands were like paralyzed and I grinned.   
Putting on her serious voice, Lydia tried to get away from my grip.  
“Mr. Stilinski, would you be ever so kind as to release me from your bear hug?”   
I responded by pulling her closer, mischief playing in my brown eyes.   
She tried to keep a straight face, but it didn’t work and she broke into laugh, still trying to get away.   
“Okay okay.” I said in defeat, letting go of her. My body immediately tightened at the loss of contact and she walked around me, leaving for the bathroom.   
Jesus Christ.   
My phone started buzzing in my pocket and I unlocked it, only to find a message.  
 _“I’m drunk and I want to “SEE” tyiu ” -Malia_


	11. The night

Lydia came back to the room, finding Stiles typing something on his phone, with an irritated look.   
“Everything’s okay?” She raised an eyebrow.   
He looked at her and nodded in agreement, his lips escaping a sweet smile. Stiles swayed a little on his heels, still smirking at her. He just looked at her for a moment and she giggled over his gaze.  
“Okay, let’s go to bed, Casanova.”   
His eyes lit up at that, though he was very well aware her saying that was not what it sounded like. Still, he couldn’t help but think, how natural and carefree it went from her mouth and how he would like to hear that every day.   
It stirred something in him, but he just smiled again, shaking his head mildly.  
“Okay, let’s go to bed, Bambi.”   
**  
He plopped onto his bed, wearing only his boxers and she was wearing a beautiful smile on her face. He lay on his side, sloppily throwing on drapes, and she mirrored him. They were looking at each other now, seeing shadows on each other’s faces, as the only light in the room were Stiles’ bed lamp and the sparkle in their eyes.   
“Not sleepy?” He asked her quietly.  
“Not even a little.” She whispered, in a voice he hasn’t heard from her before. It was a little trembling and wary. She breathed out a puff of air, soft wave of her mint breath landing straight on his face, sending shivers down his bare spine.  
“Uhm… Malia texted me.” He stated in a hoarse voice.  
Lydia’s emerald eyes widened, and she bit her lip. Stiles watched her body language, trying to understand it and his guesses confirmed, when he saw her eyebrows pull in in annoyance.  
“Cool, I guess? What did she say?” She questioned in a casual voice.  
Stiles suppressed a smile. A lion in his chest made a happy dance, realizing that she was actually bothered by this. He coughed before answering.  
“Not much. Wanted to see me.”   
“Why didn’t you go and see her?” She asked blatantly.   
He stopped himself from saying something stupid and beamed at her playfully. Her own expression softened.  
“I didn’t want to.”   
“Why not?”  
“You know why.”   
She didn’t respond to him after that, and silence filled the room. Stiles watched her eyes blink heavier and heavier every time and he bent forward, taking her off guard by kissing her cheek.   
“Good night, Bambi.” He whispered in her ear.   
Her heart slowed down and without comprehending what came onto her, she grabbed his arm gently and pulled him closer, catching him in surprise. Stiles watched her, his eyes mixture of amaze and amusement. Her green eyes caught his wary look, his hazel eyes darkening a little.   
Still holding his mien she put her head on his chest, wrapping her slender arm around his bare torso. Without saying anything, he enveloped her small frame around him, pulling her closer.   
As she hugged him, his breathing slowed, every muscle in his body relaxed. How much he needed her, terrified him.   
“Why didn’t you go see Malia?” She whispered to his chest.   
He sighed, running his fingertips up and down her back.   
“I don’t want to. I didn’t want to be with her. I wanted to be with you.” He murmured.  
She didn’t say anything to that, but he could slightly feel her long eyelashes tickling his chest as she blinked. Her arm swathed around him tighter, her soundless answer making him smile.  
“Did you make up with Allison?”   
She tensed up a bit.  
“No. She left with Scott pretty soon after you left. Where did you go anyway?”   
“My dad’s.” He answered quietly.  
“Oh.” She mumbled. “How did it go?”   
“It was okay, I guess.” He laughed. “He always puts me on the right track when I start going down.”   
“You mean when you’re an asshole, Stilinski?” She lifted her eyes to him, playful gaze going right through him.   
“Yeah, pretty much.” Raven haired boy giggled. “Not with you though.”   
That swiped a smile off her face and she eyed him curiously.   
“You have to talk like a normal human being if you want me to understand you, you know.”   
He took a deep breath and focused on the ceiling, trying to pick his words carefully. When he looked back at her, she was watching him with the same expression, curious, trusting. Eager.  
“What I meant was…” He started. “Uhm, it’s different with you. You wake me up and I’m not angry or irritated or… asshole around you. Mostly.” He laughed, remembering their fight in the morning. “I don’t know how to say this. You’re just… You’re not pointless. Not like anything else in my life, basically. You’re actually good. It’s like you’re always here to tell me to slow down, just calm. And you somehow are still able to handle my temper.” He smiled at her. “And I don’t really want to know what I would do if you didn’t.”   
She listened to his silent confession, her heart pounding rapidly against her chest. She wanted to tell him desperately that she feels the same way. But every time she opened her mouth she remembered her past, the life she left behind. And he was it. He was just… it. She was starting to fall for this guy, but a version of him had already hurt her.   
Lydia swallowed at the dark memories, playing in her mind. He was watching her with warm eyes, as if he was trying to read her thoughts.   
He knew immediately they were not good.  
“Stiles… They fixed Boiler at ours.”   
His eyebrows pulled in and brown irises developed to sad shades. They both knew what it meant.  
She was leaving him.  
Bambi was leaving him.   
“They called me in the afternoon.”   
Stiles closed his eyes, his expression darkening. His forehead wrinkled and he opened his eyes, looking at her with hurtful look.  
“Are you okay?” She asked gently, not trusting her voice.  
He managed a single laugh.  
“I gotta tell you, Bambi. You couldn’t have told me three months ago that I’d be this miserable over saying goodbye to a girl.”   
Her stomach sank and she pulled herself up, her face closer to his.  
“I don’t want you to be miserable.”  
“Then don’t go.” His expression was frantic and she closed her eyes. His strong arms enfolded her stronger and she felt a familiar heat pooling in her underwear, as he pulled her up almost on his own hard body.   
“Then stay with me, Lydia.” He whispered.   
“I don’t live here, silly.” She said gently. “I promise you, when I leave you’ll understand what a pain in the ass I was and you’ll forget all about missing me.”  
His hurtful expression indicated that he didn’t believe her. A feeling of guilt settled over her but there was nothing really she could do.   
“How about I keep you here?” He spoke again, in a slightly lighter tone.   
The sound of her laughter settled in his ears and she escaped his embrace, lying back on her side of the bed, but he hated the coldness in his body and in his chest as she pulled away. So Stiles shifted closer again.  
“I’m serious. How about we make a bet?”   
“What?”   
“I don’t want you to leave Lydia. Everything is ten times better when you’re around.”   
She put her hand on his cheek in response and he closed his eyes, feeling her intimate touch.   
“I have an idea.” He muttered and the air felt thick with the feeling between them, like it was filling the room: a room full of our carnal heat, and sorrow of an upcoming goodbye, they both knew was close.   
“I’ll tell you what Bambi.” He started in a husky voice and she knew immediately she was in trouble. “If, and it’s until you move out, if you can’t stop me from kissing you, you stay here with me.” He breathed hot air with his offer.  
She watched him with a smile, unable to move from his strong hand around her small waist and she wanted nothing more than to throw the blanket away from them, as she felt her body catch fire.   
“I managed until now, didn’t I? And what do I get if I win?”   
Stiles shrugged in response, positioning his head on her pillow, his side of the bed long forgotten.   
“If you win, I stay. If I win…” She pretended to be thinking and Stiles let a laugh escape his lips at her adorable pout. “If I win, you go without sex for one and a half month.”   
His lips parted in shock, but it slowly curved into a smile. He popped on his elbow and looked down at her.   
“Didn’t know you had it in you, Bambi! Deal.”   
They shook hands and he tilted her head at her, before laying beside her again.  
“Okay, now really, goodnight. We have class tomorrow.” He alleged in a low voice.   
He felt her sigh, relaxing into his body as his arms wrapped around her, pushing her closer to him. He buried his head into her shoulder, then placed his lips on her neck.   
He placed a kiss on the side of her mouth, and she knew what was coming next.  
She kept pulling back and he kept chasing. It was that she just didn’t know what would happen if she let herself go.   
His breath sent tiny sparks down between her legs and suddenly she felt charged, in need of friction. Lydia unwillingly licked her lips, causing a low, guttural groan from him that sounded more like a plea.   
“Stiles…” She warned.  
And then he kissed her, nearly bruising. It was eager and wanted for so long, she felt intoxicated. He was poisoning and contaminating her with affection and lust, and she felt a surge of fire through her veins and in her lower body, as she moaned his name in his mouth, between their sloppy kisses.


	12. Lost my senses, I'm defenseless....

_Lost my senses_  
I’m defenseless  
Her perfume’s holding me ransom… 

“Oh, man you have no idea…” Stiles groaned.  
 _His mouth came down on hers. And that was it. All the self-control he’d exerted over the past weeks went, like water crashing through a broken dam. Her arms came up around his neck and he pulled her against him… His hands flattened against her back..._  
“I’m addicted to her, I swear…” He murmured to his hands, as he was rubbing his tired eyes.   
Scott put the mug in front of him with mischievous smile.  
“So… Did you do it?!” He chuckled. “Cuz if you did, man, you two are quiet!..”  
Stiles shot him a look through his fingers, memories of last night bursting into his mind.  
 _He clung to her more tightly, knotting his hands in her hair, trying to tell her, with the press of his mouth on hers, all the things he could never say out loud..._  
“Scott, a lady will never tell!” Stiles grinned teasingly, taking a sip of his coffee.  
“That’s why I’m asking you, idiot.”   
Stiles groaned again, provoking a laughter out of Scott. Stiles had been groaning and whining all morning.  
He dipped her low and kissed her fiercely, as if he was angry, and each time his lips left hers, even just for half a second, the most parching thirst ran through her.  
“No, Scotty, we didn’t do it.”  
Scott’s face dropped, but Stiles just smirked in response. He looked at his best friend with a smile. Scott was standing with a cup in his hand, his hair as messy as Stiles’, a few light scratches were seeable on his tan body and his face expression was so comical, Stiles broke a giggle.  
His friend eyed him suspiciously.  
“You’re fucking with me, right?”   
“No, I’d like to do that with her, buddy.”  
“Stiles! You…” He stuttered, watching his friend up and down. “You seriously didn’t have sex? I thought that was all you wanted.”   
Stiles looked at him, his sneer changing to dumbfounded and annoyed.   
“That’s not all I wanted, asshole. I’m not an animal.”  
“You’re literally a whore, Stiles.”   
“Oh, shut up, wouldn’t you?!” Stiles threw a napkin at him, but it landed right in front of him, due to it’s lightness.  
Scott laughed, making his already puffed eyes turn into two twin lines.  
“Hey, guess who I am!” He mocked, taking a piece of paper and throwing it in front of him, with fake anger.   
Stiles rolled his eyes and took another sip. He had to shower immediately. Or anything, to take his mind off her lips and her flat stomach, when her shirt rolled up a little, revealing her smooth skin, as she arched her back up, trying to get closer to him…  
 _Fuck_ , he thought, trying to pull himself together.   
“Hey?!” Scott snapped his fingers in front of him, sitting in front of him, at the other side of their kitchen table.  
Raven haired guy stared at his best friend for a moment, then started answering his silent question.  
“I don’t know, it wasn’t out of nowhere. It was…okay, I mean I she wasn’t in the middle of… stopping an orgasm or something.” He rolled his eyes again. “We kinda…stopped for a minute, and she told me she didn’t want to rush it. And I actually agreed, it’s all good. She has every right to say stop, or to say no. It’s not just her body I’m crazy about, dig it? I actually… Want to listen to her talk and babble and explain her crazy mathematical theories…” He lowered his voice and put his chin in his palm, soft smile playing on his lips, its warmth reaching his brown eyes.   
Scott listened to him in awe, nodding. Half smile tugged on his lips and he shook his head.  
“Damn it. Wow, my best friend is finally feeling something. That’s… new.”  
“Piss off!”   
“No, you know what I mean. I’ve never seen you like this. I don’t think I’ve ever actually heard you talk about a girl in a good way… well, before sex. Jesus, man, what did she do with you?”  
Stiles looked at his best friend for a moment.  
“You sound like I’m emotionally damaged.”   
Scott tilted his head to both sides, indicating that he was partly saying that. Stiles gave him a look.  
“Go scratch with your kitty, and stay out of my business, puppy.”   
With that he closed his eyes, drowning himself in his own thoughts. He heard Scott stumble upstairs in a minute.  
 _Her hands draped around his neck, and he rested his forehead against her. She pulled off and looked at him. She felt his breath on her lips, like a shadow. Their lips were so close, but still not touching. Like he was protecting hers with his own. She brushed her nose up and down his cheek, testing his body heat, examining every detail of his face. He pressed his lips to her cheek, and he didn’t broke the contact, he let it slowly slide down, and then he stopped on the corner of her lips. He kissed that place one time, then their lips were on the same level again. Lydia left out a shaky breath, that remained on his lips, and now they were less than millimeters apart._  
“Boo!”   
Her scent reached him quicker than her voice. Trail of flowers and perfume or whatever that was, so sweet that made his stomach curl, got to him and he opened his eyes, sitting up so he could see her.  
Her golden hair was tousled and wet, as she was just fresh from the shower. She was smiling shyly at him, but this time her smile had a new color. It was a little sexier and more honest, that got Stiles wondering how the hell it was manageable for perfection to look more perfect. Her comfy clothes looked so unnecessary he had to stop himself from peeling them off.   
“Morning, Bambi.” He purred.   
“Mhm.” She humbled in response, still grinning at him and she stepped closer to where he was sitting. Their faces were at the same level and Stiles insides started jumping up and down, as his eyes got a shade darker.  
They were close enough that he could feel the hurried beat of her heart. He could feel Lydia's eager in every breath she took and every move she made. She might not was leaning into him, but she wasn't pulling away, either.  
“We’re having people over. In the evening.” She stated in a sweet voice, her eyes dropping to his pink lips.   
“Okay.” He said, sliding one hand around her waist, pulling her close.  
“I invited Isaac and Erica and some people from my classes.”  
“Okay,” he mumbled again, tugging at her waist so that now she was standing between his legs, as he was still sitting on the bar chair.   
“Maybe I’ll invite Jackson too…” She pretended to think. When he immediately pulled away Lydia smirked and bit her lip.  
His hazel eyes got even darker, or maybe she was just imagining, but Lydia saw his lust mix up with anger in a second.   
“Yeah, if you want someone to visit the hospital.”   
She laughed at that and touched his cheek with a palm. He calmed down immediately, looking at her with sparkling eyes. His hands slid a little lower than her waist and she recognized mischief growing in his look. Just when he was about to capture her lips she leaned back, furrowing his eyebrows.  
“But he does have cute cheekbones…”  
“Lydia, do you _want_ me to hurt him?!”   
xxx  
Stiles and Lydia looked around the apartment, and he tried to ignore the way her fingertips touched his in the dim light, as they watched their friends having fun.   
Isaac was getting high on their couch with Allison, while Scott was in a dance battle with Boyd in the middle of the room. The apartment was filled with smoke and music, light was barely in the room, which made perfect corners for dark deeds and locked up wishes.   
“We need glasses,” Lydia said to Stiles, walking to the kitchen.  
“Maybe you need glasses, I can see just perfectly.” He sniggered, following her closely.  
She turned away and he crashed into her, but she tried not to seem so affected, and she covered it with laughter at his stupid joke.  
“Aw! I have a crush on a nine year old!” Girl winked at him.  
Stiles stood dead in his tracks, after hearing her words.   
_Bambi has a crush on me. And she said it._  
Without saying anything he grabbed her arm before she could reach the shelf and turned her around fiercely, then, out of the blue, he rapidly pressed his lips to hers.  
His kiss was stern, desperate, and slow, drugging. A shudder passed through Lydia, warming her body from the inside out. She felt all her defenses dissolved. They started making out again and she let Stiles slip his hand inside her top, on her bare back. This time, when he kissed her, something inside her awoke and a shudder warmed her skin. Their kisses got more passionate and hotter.   
When they kissed she immediately felt his tongue, tensed and strong, pushing past her teeth, like some bully shouldering his way into a room. Girl was shocked at how eagerly her body responded. His arm went around her waist, pulling her to him further, and his other hand slid up the back of her neck, getting entangled in her hair. He took his lips away from her mouth, gently trailing kisses down to her neck. Lydia tipped her head back, gasping when the intensity returned to her mouth. There was an animalistic quality that sent shock waves through the rest of their bodies.   
“Jesus Christ.” They heard a disgusted voice behind them and they pulled away with a pop. Still wrapped around each other they eyed the person in the kitchen. Lydia wasn’t sure if that was because she felt dizzy and disoriented, or she really didn’t recognize the person in the room.  
“Who let you out of the kindergarten?” Stiles growled playfully at their marplot.   
Lydia blinked a few times, then licked her lips, finally getting a good vision of a girl in front of them.  
She was short, probably just as short as Lydia. Girl had cute black hair that cupped her childish face. She was definitely Korean, and before Lydia could react, girl spoke again, grabbing a pack of chips off the table, not showing any discomfort, as she had just interrupted a heated make out.  
“What were you girls doing?” She teased and winked at Stiles.  
“Talking.” Lydia responded just as friskily.  
“Well you have to be deaf as post if you need to talk in such a close proximity.”   
Stiles laughed at that, but Lydia could still sense traces of annoyance in his eyes.   
“Introduce us.” Girl ordered Stiles happily.  
Stiles shot an apologetic smile to Lydia and stepped away from her, dropping his hands from her waist. Lydia awkwardly ran her fingers through her hair, that she knew perfectly, were as mess as her hormones were.  
“Lydia, this is Kira. Kira, Lydia.”   
“Mmm,” Kira beamed, shaking Lydia’s hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you. Scott told me about you, you know.”   
At that, Stiles rushed over to her and stood behind her, covering her mouth with his hand.  
Lydia started laughing at that.   
“Ew!” He exclaimed, flaking his hand away. “Control your tongue, would you?”   
“That’s what she said.” Kira responded with a smirk.   
Lydia walked over to both of them and pointed her finger at Kira.  
“I like you. I’m gonna keep you.” Both girls chuckled and Stiles rolled his eyes, laughing.   
“Well thank you, Lydia, I like you too. Scott said you’re finally bringing him down a peg. Thank God, it was about time.”   
“How do you two know each other anyway?” Lydia giggled.   
“He’s my little sister.” Kira smiled affectionately at him and he shook his head.  
“Have you been taking pot from Isaac again?” He turned to Lydia, she was eyeing him curiously, curving her puckery lips into a smile. “Meaning that she was Scott’s first girlfriend back in fifth grade, and she kinda stayed around.”  
“Agh!” Kira cried loudly. “Excuse me? I believe it, it was you who couldn’t stop following me around, just because you were too lazy, well, or stupid, to do your bio homework on your own.”  
Strawberry blonde laughed heartedly, liking this girl’s comical way to put Stiles in his place.   
Guy walked over to her and wrapped her around the middle.   
“Ts, ts.. the lies, Kira.” Stiles beamed at his friend in front of him. “You’re gonna burn my brain out one day with them.”   
Kira shrugged.  
“For that, one should have to have at least… some brain. So you don’t worry about it.” Before Stiles could backfire, she grabbed Lydia’s hand and led her out of the kitchen.  
“You dance, Lydia?”   
xxx  
Stiles, Scott and Isaac watched in awe, as Lydia and Kira danced together. Allison was asleep on Isaac’s shoulder, and other people sat in corners, laughing and talking, music abusing their hearing.  
Kira and Lydia swayed and jumped to the music, laughing and talking all the way through. They were both very well aware on how it would affect the boys, but that was what made it so much fun. Their hands were in the air, when Stiles finally got up and went to Lydia.   
“Oh. My. God.” He begged to her ear. His voice was low and husky.   
Lydia smiled with a tipsy smile, even though she was completely sober. She took five dollars out of her jeans pocket and handed them to Kira, who laughed joyfully.  
“Ten minutes it is.” She said.   
A wicked curve appeared on Stiles’ lips.   
“I was just thinking now was as good time as any to acknowledge the fact that you’re perfect and it wouldn’t suck if you fell madly in love with me anytime soon.” He whispered to her lips, as she was already facing him.   
Suddenly he felt the girl tense and smile left her face. She opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out and she just stared at him for a moment, before freeing herself from his grip.  
“Excuse me for a minute…” She muttered walking past him and straight upstairs.   
Stiles cursed under his breath.   
“Lydia? Lydia!”   
He followed her upstairs and caught her hand to stop her in the middle of the hall. She didn’t turn at him at first, so he walked around her and looked her in the eyes.  
“What’s wrong?”   
Girl let out a frustrated sigh.  
“Madly in love with you?!”  
Stiles stared back at her in confusion, not understanding what was it that he said that made her so worked up.   
“You think sleeping with you is okay to…put off, but love references are just fine?!” She let her temper get the best of her.  
The guy in front of her still stood there without saying anything, not completely understanding why she was mad. He threw his hands in the air spastically and she sighed.  
“Stiles, I’m not ready to… God, Stiles! I’m not ready to sleep with you, I was barely ready to kiss you, and now you talk about falling in love with you!” She stomped her foot angrily and he would’ve found it adorable if he wasn’t getting equally as angry.  
“Jesus, Lydia, it was a figure of speech!”  
“You know very well that it wasn’t, Stiles.”  
“What are you so afraid of?!”   
“Stiles!” She yelled and he stopped saying whatever it was he was beginning to say. “Last time I jumped into things, the guy left me to go to fucking Afganistan, and he didn’t think it was a big deal because he didn’t think we knew each other that well for the fact to matter anyway! So excuse me for wanting to slow down!”  
He shook his head crossly.   
“You have to be heading somewhere before you can slow down, Lydia!”  
“Don’t say that! It just… You’re too much too soon, Stiles!”  
“Oh would you just stop looking for problems between us?! When are you going to see that we are good, very good together? I know that I’m a fuck up, but there is no way I would screw up this!” He motioned at the space between them.   
Lydia took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. She looked at him from under lashes, but was taken aback by his angry eyes.  
“I’m not… I can’t stop what I’m feeling! It is impossible!” He continued. “Just stop making up shit as an excuse not to be with me!”  
“Stiles, that’s not what I’m saying…”   
“Yeah you basically are. First it was that I was screwing everyone around me, then you couldn’t even tell me what you were feeling, now you’re saying that we need to slow down when all we’ve done was make out, for the love of God!”   
“You know very well that’s not what I meant. You told me it would be a good idea to fall in... fall freaking in love with you!”   
“Jesus, why do you always do this?” He suddenly spoke in calmer voice and unexpected sadness appeared on his face.  
“Do what?”  
“You give me these signs and feelings and then you leave me. You leave me to dry.”   
“Stiles…”  
He stepped closer, bringing his hands to her face. Very gently raven haired boy caressed her cheeks and exhaled. They both closed their eyes at the same time and he leaned her forehead against hers.  
“I may be a douchebag, and hot tempered and a… dick, but I’m not that ass-wipe Parrish. He has no idea what he’s done leaving you. I’m not him okay? I’m not leaving you, I won’t leave you. Even though you’re constantly leaving me…” He ended in a whisper. 

Aghhh, I gave you something heated, didn't I? :P Can't wait for your thoughts!


	13. You and me...

_Okay, notes are at the end! Probably the most romantic chapter yet!_

_GUYS! Like..don’t do it if you think it’s lame, I totally get it, but if you like the idea, listen to Emma Lee - I could live with dying tonight, on repeat while reading… Really helps the mood…. :)_

Lydia blinked her green eyes to him. She focused on his darkened irises, that were somewhat mix of affection, and lust, with a hint of tipsiness, then maybe she was just imagining it, but she could’ve sworn he was also sad, after saying what he had just said.  
 _I’m not leaving you, I won’t leave you. Even though you’re constantly leaving me…_  
Stiles was still caressing her cheeks, and Lydia’s eyes softened. She put her arms on his, her thumb softly tracing his knuckles.  
“Okay,” She whispered back, and that got him to lean back and look at her with more vulnerable look. “Okay, I’m sorry.” She continued inaudibly.  
“I know that I’m a little..messed up.” She nodded and felt him slide closer. “I am paranoid, and I am scared.”  
She closed her eyes and he rested his forehead against hers again. Their faces were millimeter apart and he tilted his head slightly, then traced the tip of his nose against her cheek, making her giggle quietly. Stiles parted his lips and touched the spot near her mouth, then drew them up, to peck her nose softly. Waves of pleasure and susceptibility rushed up her body and Lydia let out a shuddering sigh.  
Surprising her, he kept going up, not down. She felt a barely-there touch of his soft lips on her closed eyes, each one of them. Stiles let go of her face and wrapped his arms around her waist, then firmly kissed her forehead in a protective way.  
Lydia felt her knees go a little week at the movement and it startled her, witnessing how Stiles was actually capable of being vulnerable. Something told her that that was not the side of him that was accessible to many people.  
“I know,” He spoke and leaned back to look at her, this time with a smile.  
“We’re not the best of news, are we, Bambi?”  
Lydia mirrored his smile and wrapped her arms around his middle too.  
“Yeah, we are actually the worst.” Girl nodded with a mild grin. Then she got serious again, and Stiles took a breath, knowing that they still needed to solve that.  
“You still need to give me time.” She stated silently, not dropping her eyes away from his.  
To her surprise, he didn’t fight her about it, he didn’t even say anything against, he simply nodded.  
“I know. I’m sorry. I got carried away.”  
The most important question hung on the tip of her tongue and she bit her lip to stop it from bursting out. She was eager to know if he really meant it, if he was already there. If somewhere between the first time they met, downstairs, in line to the bathroom, and now, he had actually fallen in love with her. His previous words rang in her head, even though he never actually said it, he implied it very clearly. Lydia wanted an answer, but at the same time she was too scared of it.  
“What’s with the pouting?” He joked.  
She rolled her eyes and smirked.  
“Well do you have a problem with that?” She whispered, pursing her lips on purpose, happy when she saw his eyes focusing on them like on candy he so terribly wanted to taste.  
Lydia got closer, and slowly, seductively bit her lip, lowering her hands further to his bottom, sudden mischief in her eyes. Oh, she loved doing that to him.  
Stiles didn’t think even for a second, as if he was taken by some magic force, he pressed his lips against hers in a sudden kiss. His vulnerability was now changed to playfulness and passion, and his hands traveled to her hair. They kept kissing, and he touched her neck with his hand, drawing his fingers against her skin. He turned her around in a swift movement and pressed her back against the wall. They had to break for air and Lydia smiled at him. Stiles nearly whimpered at the sight of her swollen lips, his body tensing in every good way, feeling giddy and aroused that it was him that made her look like that. Her hair was a mess, eyes sparkling and lips begged to be abused by his. She looked like sex, she smelled like sex, and his hungry eyes trailed up and down her body.  
“I’m guessing you don’t have a problem with that, then.” Lydia pondered dreamily.  
“You were biting your lip. You shouldn’t bite your lip, unless you want me to do it too.” He retorted in a hoarse voice and leaned in to plant a kiss on her lips again, this time gently nipping at her full bottom lip.  
When he pulled back, Lydia leaned her head to the wall, taking a few breaths. Stiles watched her as some kind of dirty movie, his nerves trembling, the need of her tearing him apart.  
“Should we go downstairs? To check on them?” Lydia spoke in a dry voice.  
He took her hand, pulling her from the wall.  
“No. They’re okay, I’m sure. Wanna go to… sleep?” He started walking backwards to their room, leading her with him.  
She smiled in a knowing smile, then turned her head to the stairs, as if she was thinking about going there. The music has gotten softer now, and judging from the silence, most of the party people were probably asleep or too high on Isaac’s pot.  
“Come on.” Stiles tugged on her hand gently and she gave in. They started walking to his bedroom, stumbling against each other, laughing, like little kids. She looked at him laughing. She loved the part he brought out of her. And the way he was around her himself. She felt hear heart beat disloyally to her chest and she looked away, with a mild blush.  
Stiles opened the door and slowly walked in, Lydia followed him. In a second, the room suddenly looked different. More welcoming, somehow more seductive. Neither of them turned up the lights, they just stayed in a dark, the room lightened a little by a beautiful moonlight. Lydia shivered.  
He turned to her, eyeing her with darker, hungrier look, then stepped impossibly closer. She felt his hand on her hip, rolling her shirt up a little, touching her hipbone. He moved slowly, and she tilted her head to the side, still watching him. Stiles leaned down to kiss her neck and she closed her eyes. But instead of feeling his lips, she felt his breathing as he whispered.  
“I know you’ll say we’re not having sex tonight. And for the first time, I agree with you.”  
Lydia swallowed, her lips unwillingly parting. She stood in front of him, panting, completely thrown off by his hot breath, and she felt strong eagerness in her underwear, knowing she was becoming a wet dream within moments.  
“You do?” She whispered.  
His hands rested on her collarbones, then his fingers started undoing already loosened bow of her shirt, that was placed on her chest.  
“As much as I want, Lydia, I’m not going to sleep with you with all those people downstairs.” He kept working on her blouse, and she hooked her fingers in his jeans loops, arching him to herself. “I respect you just too much to do that.” He continued, but his voice was still betraying his coolness.  
She knew that he was right. There was no way they were going to sleep together with a party, even if it was a dead one, going on one floor under them. But she couldn’t stop her limbs going week.  
“Then why are you undressing me?” She asked to his lips.  
“Why are you?” He defended in the same voice and Lydia furrowed her eyebrows. It was then, when she noticed that she was involuntarily rolling his shirt up his stomach, that now where all the way up to his torso.  
Her green eyes stopped at his stomach muscles and she smiled as innocently as she could, lifting her gaze back to his face.  
“Maybe I wanted to test you.”  
He growled a little, shaking his head.  
“You keep testing me like that, baby, I’m gonna fail.”  
Lydia responded to him by tearing his shirt away, yanking it over his head. He smirked, but it was somehow different, Lydia noticed. This time there was more feeling to it.  
So he did the same to her. Stiles undressed her upper body, messing her hair and making her chuckle. He smiled at the sound and slid his hands around her bare body, pressing her to him, hot skin on skin. Her hands found their way to his hair.  
“I mean it. I’m not having sex with you tonight, so you might as well just stop asking.” He teased.  
She laughed freely.  
“I know we’re…not, but still… You’re such a girl.”  
He wanted to look shocked but a giggle still escaped his lips and he beamed at her.  
“You’re gonna pay for that.”  
“O, I hope so.” She grinned and squeaked as he picked her up, tossing her over his shoulder, his hands shamelessly holding her by her thighs.  
“Stiles! Put me down!”  
“As you wish.”  
He dropped her on the bed, and she laughed again. Oh, he could not get over her laugh. And her smell that welcomed him every morning.  
Stiles towered over her, making her feel small and delicate, and Lydia thought it was the safest she’d ever felt. He firmly pulled her body against his and he brushed her lips with his. Staring into her eyes, he lightly slid his tongue across her bottom lip. She drew a deep, staggered breath in response to the wave of heat she felt flushing through her. Stiles smiled at her. Then, he softly kissed her. He lightly swept his tongue between her lips, pressing his warm, soft lips to hers. He slid his hands up her body and cradled her face with his hands. Then, he passionately kissed her, tickling her tongue with his. He sucked her lips, gently, as though he was sampling nectar on a delicate petal. She felt fluttering inside. Lydia’s body craved him. A shallow hum escaped from within her in response to how he was making her feel. She could feel his body responding to her. He was breathing heavier which was waking Lydia’s primal needs even more. The tidal wave of lust that had just churned within her was slowly calming as his kiss became more subtle and tender. He gently pressed his lips against hers. He pulled back a little and looked away, exhaling.  
“I gotta tell you…” He muttered. “I have never undressed a girl to this and not have sex with her.”  
Lydia smiled.  
“Well, there’s always a first time for everything…”  
Stiles struggled to tear his eyes away from her and plopped beside her. They looked at each other from their sides of the bed and he started speaking.  
“I love your smell. And your hair. And your lips. Like… I’m crazy about it.”  
“Stiles,” she said quietly. “We’re not gonna make it through the night if you keep talking like that.”  
He chuckled and sat up. Lydia watched him curiously; he changed positions and laid his head on her thigh, almost in her lap. He was facing the ceiling and the girl smiled. They were laying in two different directions, him being sideways to bed, and her along the mattress. They weren’t even looking at each other, both of their eyes focused up, but emotion was so strong, they didn’t even have to.  
She reached out and tangled her fingers in his ruffled hair, then started massaging it in soft circles. Stiles sighed.  
“What is your dad like?” Lydia asked gently.  
Stiles snorted, still looking up.  
“Uhm… He is… just the best man I know. He always talks sense into me. Like… shows me the right path. And he really loves me, you know.” His voice got quieter. “He raised me by myself. Like,” he chuckled. “he got the worst part, my teenage years.”  
Lydia kept caressing his hair and every muscle in his body relaxed, easing into her welcoming touch.  
“Melissa, Scott’s mom was always there to help. She’s like… literally an angel. Amazing woman. You know, she raised Scott on her own, too.”  
Suddenly Stiles reached up and grabbed her hand. At first Lydia thought it was to yank it away, but he brought it to his chest, placing in where his heart was. She popped on her elbow, to watch him more closely but his eyes were closed.  
He kept both of his hands on top of hers. His chest was burning.  
“That’s partly why me and Scott are so close, you know.. We met way before my, my mum, uhm, went away, and his dad left him, but you know, our parents helping each other and working each other… It brought us even closer; we’re like package deal now.” He smiled.  
Lydia listened to him attentively, then bit her lip, getting an idea.  
“Do you think your dad and Scott’s mom..?”  
“Oh yeah, no, they’re together now.” He nodded immediately. “It was a long time coming. Thank God actually. I was worried he was going to get lonely without me.”  
Stiles opened his eyes.  
“What about you? Normal childhood, princess?” He smiled.  
Lydia immediately tensed up, softness leaving her face a shade. She licked her lips and coughed.  
“No, not really.”  
“Mom? Or dad?”  
“Oh, I grew up with both of them, if that’s what you’re asking.” Her voice got small. “We just had… issues, I guess.” She shrugged and he didn’t want to push, seeing that it was making her uncomfortable, but she started talking again herself. “My dad was sort of uhm… Well, player for certain. I don’t even know why my mom waited so long to divorce him…” Girl shook her head. “She certainly knew all about his hookups… So, anyway, he was a gambler. Yeah. And being his little girl, I was always his lucky charm. And it was… working, at least if you believe it. But… the people I grew up with.” She winced and closed her eyes.  
Stiles squeezed her hand and furrowed his eyebrows.  
“Was it that bad?”  
“Well…” She tilted her head, avoiding his eyes. “I mean, I was always around my dad. So, normally I was always around his… type people. Stiles, I grew up around cute and charming guys, who were sleeping with every girl that walked by, and they were drinking, and partying and… flirting.” She shook her head, as if she had just been struck with unpleasant memory. “They were assholes in general. It’s not… the best way to bring up a little girl.”  
Stiles’ breathing hitched, at the same time anxiousness overcame his body. He inhaled sharply to unpleasant realization that her description was very accurate to himself. It made him feel somewhat… bad.  
“So, I had to get away.” She kept talking. “It wasn’t… my best time. Being hit on by guys who looked at me like I was a walking one night stand, always in the middle of games and….” She shook her head. “So, yeah, I had to get away. And Ally, she… She helped me. She came here with me, kinda to protect me, from all that stupid shit that formed me the way I am today.”  
Lydia wasn’t looking at him anymore; she kept her sparkly eyes forward. All lust and playfulness was gone from her and hurtful nostalgia was evident in her voice.  
Stiles sat up slowly, and her hand dropped from his chest. He breathed all the courage he had and asked in a steady voice.  
“And the first thing you walk into, when you got here… Was me?”  
She finally looked at him with serious eyes. Their feet were tangled in the sheets and it was as messy as her golden curls.  
“Yeah. Yeah, it was. But that doesn’t matter.” She whispered.  
“How come?” He asked in a miserable voice. He hated it. He hated that the way he was, reminded her of her… bad years. It made a little sense now. Was it always like that? Did she always look at him and see her own misery?  
“I don’t know. You called me Bambi.” She joked slightly, but his face remained serious.  
“Do you… When you look at me. Do you see… Them? Do you remember all that?”  
She lifted her big, green watery eyes to him.

_SO?!!! Please let me know what you think!!!! Did you listen to the song? How do you feel about the chapter? :)_   
_To be honest, the first part of the chapter was…really personal, so I just.. I don’t know, I hope you liked it._   
_I know what y’all gonna say…. WHY YOU KEEP POSTPONING SEX?! Agh, I know, don’t hate me :( I still felt a little…hot, writing this…:)_   
_I’m waiting for your comments! :))_


	14. Asshole?

He watched her with the same hurt and embarrassed expression that hadn’t left his face from the moment he realized what the problem was.  
Lydia licked her lips and lowered her eyes from him. Her features got rougher; she was trying to come up with the right way to explain everything to him.  
“Stiles,” She spoke quietly. “It’s okay. I… Wow, I can’t even… I don’t know how to say this to you, because everything in my head sounds very wrong no matter what words I put together. Okay, yes, you may have reminded me of my past before, but, not anymore, okay?” She scooted closer. “I don’t look at you and see my twisted past, or… my father who didn’t give a rat’s ass about me, or the drugs and the fuck ups, I…” Her voice broke down from the emotion. In that moment Stiles wanted to wrap his arms around her and hold her and make her feel better but everything just went grey. He didn’t know if it was his place. It made him sick and angry at the same time, that his lifestyle, that _he_ made her feel this uncomfortable. He was absolutely crazy about her, she was the first girl that made him feel this sort of rush and high, and it was as if someone twisted a knife in his damaged disastrous heart, that the version of him had already hurt her. Oh, the irony…   
“Lydia.”   
She looked at him with a stronger look, vulnerability hidden and Stiles felt a clench in his heart that told him this wasn’t the first time she locked her emotions up and tried to be tough. His eyebrows pulled in. Absolutely no girl, no teenager and… no woman should’ve gone through that. Stiles tilted his head. She was just as scratched as he was.  
“When you said… That I’m too much too soon. Were you actually talking about the way I’m too much like… That I’m too screwed up?”  
“No!” Girl cut him off quickly and came closer to him in attempt to calm down his doubts, but he slid away, avoiding her eyes. He got off from the bed, with a gloomy and heartbreaking look, then walked around the bed and grabbed his T-shirt that a minute ago, lay forgotten on the floor. Without another word he yanked the door open and left the room.   
“Stiles!” She called out to him and stumbled from the mattress, following him out. She pulled on her T-shirt and rushed down the stairs, but found him lacing up his boots near the door. Most of the people were still dozed off, Allison had her head on Isaac’s shoulder, trace of drool on her cheek. Scott looked like a real puppy, curled up in a recliner.  
“Where are you going?” She asked him. He opened the door outside, but she rushed forward and pushed it close right before his nose.   
“Stiles, what the hell are you doing?”  
“I need a drink.”   
“I think we have that right here.”  
“Lydia.”   
Her green emerald eyes didn’t reach him, he wasn’t looking at her, he was looking forward. His look was colder, maybe not colder, maybe more hurt than before. That moment, when she was looking at him, at his slightly quivering bottom lip, she realized that this wasn’t easy for him too. Nobody would want to hear this from the person they want to be with. Nobody would want to be the constant reminder of everything that went wrong in someone’s life. So she stepped aside, letting him walk through, maybe letting him deal with this the way he needed to.   
He left the house but Lydia couldn’t watch him drive away, hot tears were already filling up her green eyes. She shook her head to the closed door and rushed to the kitchen before anyone could see her. But someone did.  
“What’s wrong with you?” Allison yawned, stepping into the kitchen and observing her best friend.  
Lydia was sitting on the kitchen table, her shoulders down, face expression low and tired. Her elbows were leaning against her knees and the image seemed a mixture of desperation and exhaustion.  
“What time is it? Why are your hair all messed up? What happened to you?” Allison questioned, coming closer to her friend and hopping on the table beside her.  
“I don’t know, about three in the morning,” Lydia shrugged. “Are you talking to me again?” She asked quietly, but something told Ally that the silence of her voice was not because of this question, it indicated that something was wrong, she heard this small voice of hers many many times in the past.   
So she wrapped her arm around Lydia’s shoulder and brought her closer. Strawberry blonde rested her head against Allison’s shoulder.  
“What happened, Lydia?”   
A long pause followed after that question, and Lydia mentally cringed at the memory, before speaking up.  
“I told him, Ally.”  
Her friend knew immediately what she was talking about, and she closed her eyes with a sigh.   
“How did he take it?”   
“Bad. I think he got an idea that he was the walking definition of everything that happened to me in the past. Because he is so much like… them. I don’t know, maybe now he’s feeling guilty, or mad, or sad, that I look at him and I see my own mistakes. It’s fucked up.”   
Allison gently stroked her messy hair, silently consoling her. She shook her head. She was the one who were supposed to protect her. But one day she saw the way Stiles was looking at her best friend, and she wasn’t so sure she needed protection anymore.   
“You know it’s not easy on him too. Yes, you probably are a goddamn tragedy together, but the way I see it.. He’s falling in love with you, baby. And… It’s natural he didn’t take it well. He doesn’t want to remind you of that pit of a life you were having while growing up. He wants to be with you, you know… He was so freaked out when he realized what he was feeling for you he came to talk to me. Yeah, me. And he was babbling and stuttering and I swear to God Lydia, the way he talks about you…” She stopped talking, suddenly afraid she was doing more harm than good. But Lydia sat up straighter and her hopeful expression encouraged her to keep speaking. “Just talk about it with him. Assure him that the way he is doesn’t stand in the way of you two. He needs it. I don’t think he’s ever been in love, can you blame him for being insecure? Maybe he is exactly what you need right now, Lydia.”   
Lydia looked at her with lighter eyes. Maybe everything was going to be okay. She just needed to tell him that she was okay with who he was, that he was good for her and that they were going to be okay together. Maybe it was going to work…   
“You know that a couple like you are going to fight all the time, right?”  
“You are the worst, Allison!”   
xxx   
It was about six in the morning when the girls finished talking. Their laughter woke Scott and Isaac up and they stumbled into the kitchen with barely opened eyes and unsteady legs. Lydia texted Stiles four times, but got no answer. She tried not to freak out, and Allison got that from her look immediately. She merely smiled to her while listening to Scott, trying to reassure her that he was fine, and that they were going to work it out, but Lydia couldn’t help the sinking feeling in her stomach. Maybe it was a mistake, telling him?   
“Okay, I think I’m going upstairs.” She got up and left the kitchen, shooting a small smile to the whole table. She went straight to the shower washing the day off with cold water and when she got to her room she stopped at the closet. After a second Lydia grabbed Stiles’ lacrosse jersey and pulled it on her body, his scent filling up the space around her. When she was dressing up her pajama’s bottom, she heard shouts from downstairs and opened the door in a quick movement.   
His voice became clearer with every step and her anxiety grew with every word he shouted.  
“…fucked up, Scott!” Stiles laughed hysterically in the hall, and his voice and unfocused eyes indicated that he was hammered as hell. Lydia stood on the last step of the stairs, with no power to move. He didn’t see her yet, he kept laughing to Scott, who was close to him as if he was going to collapse any second now. People in the living room were up, watching him with a curious look, not amused by his yelling.  
“We are as doomed as it gets, Scotty! I mean I’m fucked up, but you couldn’t even find your way through the shit that’s going in that crazy head of hers!” He hiccupped. “She’s seriously messed up, man! And there’s nothing I can do you know, I’m just a guy who is in love with that crazy chick!” He kept stuttering through his humorless laughter. “And that’s not even working, you know! Because she looks at me and she probably thinks I’m a piece of shit that I am, Scott! And you know what, she is right! And she got issues too. Daddy issues.” Stiles chuckled drunkenly and threw his head back. Then he noticed Lydia’s still figure standing in front of him and drunkenly smiled again.  
“Oh, my lady of the hour! What? I’m drunk? What, are you seeing your father yet? Am I too much yet?!” Fake smile didn’t leave his face but hurt filled his voice and he waited for her to answer.  
“Lydia, don’t listen to him, he’s mean drunk.” Scott turned to the girl, then back to his friend. “Stiles, come on. You’re drunk off your ass and you don’t know what you’re saying. Just come, okay?”   
“So what if I’m drunk?!” Stiles yelled angrier at his best friend. “I’m sure the princess has her wicked ways to blow off steam too, don’t you, Lydia?”   
Lydia kept watching him with a straight face, trying to keep her cool. Other people now were openly watching the show Stiles put up in front of them and she swallowed the tears away.  
“You think I’m a slut, or something?” She asked calmly.  
At that the raven haired boy snorted, then stumbled on his feet, brushing away Scott’s helping hand.  
“I think you’ve been kissed a lot.” He nodded.   
“You know what, that’s it, come on.” Scott put a hand on Stiles’ shoulder but he yanked it away, then unsteadily walked to the living room and picked up a glass.   
“What the fuck is this, gin? Lydia!” He called for her and his hazel eyes found her wavy hair in the room. She had Allison by her side, which was looking at him with a pathetic and judging look.   
“Lydia! Wanna hear a joke?” He asked. “Hey… Did your dad used to drink gin?!” He started laughing riotously and suddenly his bloodshot eyes were watery. Stiles looked straight into Lydia’s eyes, the blurry image of her hurt look made him sick and he raised a glass.  
“A toste!” He shouted. “To douchebags!” He gestured to himself. His throat tightened and his eyes lost focus. “And to absolutely fucking horror of losing your best friend. Because you were stupid in love to fall in love with her.”   
Lydia felt the first drop on her cheek and she wiped it away quickly. She crossed her hands on her chest, keeping her mouth shut. There was fire in her eyes and she almost stepped back when he saw him approaching her. She looked away trying not to cry.   
“Have you ever been in love, Lydia? It’s horrible, don’t ever try it. It makes you feel vulnerable and messed up and feeling like this. It gives someone else a permission to get inside of you and make a mess.”  
The look on his face made her want to crumble. Her throat hurt from invisible tears and his reddened eyes were stabbing.   
“Yeah, I am every mistake you have ever made. And I can see in your eyes how you despise me, and you should. So, I guess that’s it?” He walked around her to the stairs, then stopped. “Fuck, Lydia, this is your fault!”   
Sudden rage overcame her body and she rushed to him, slapping his chest hard, his expression mirrored hers.  
“How is it my fault, you asshole?”   
“You made this! You were constantly here and you made me fall in love with you, when I never asked for it! I never wanted to fall in love with you, Bambi! And then you told me how you see me from your perspective and how do you think am I supposed to feel? You told me that you look at me and see how messed up I am, you told me that I am too familiar to the way you used to live, do you know how hard it is?!”  
“I said no such thing, you idiot! It’s not my fault you’re this insecure, and look what happens, there is one problem, and you run away! You were the one who walked away from me when I was trying to make it right!”   
“I was the one running away?! You couldn’t even tell me how you felt half the time!”   
“And then I did, and I told you the darkest things, because I actually thought you were worth it, and still it wasn’t enough!”   
“Why the hell did you tell me these things, Lydia?!”   
She was openly crying now and Stiles’ eyes caught every tear that made it down her cheeks. Their expressions were the same, mostly wounded and just a little bit of angry.   
Suddenly he came closer to her but she stepped away and up the stairs. He didn’t let her go far, and grabbed her hand just in front of their room.  
“Fuck off Stiles.”   
“No, come on.”   
“Let me go, Stiles!”   
She struggled away from his grip, but he kept dragging her to the room. He took a surprising direction to the bathroom and Lydia slapped his upper hand.   
“What the hell are you doing? If you need a shower, just go take one, but let go of me. Fuck! What the hell happened to you?!”   
“You happened!” He responded turning away to face her. “You happened, Lydia! You want to know when I started to fall in love with you? One day, we were just simply laughing. And I remember that my palms were sweating and I felt as if my body was on high alert. Then I felt sick to my stomach, there was no getting around it anymore. I was falling in love with you. Big time.”   
Her watery eyes met him and he let go of her hand. Her face was puffy and she wanted to get away from there, but at the same time she wanted to fix this. She didn’t want to give up just yet, even if he did. Maybe they just needed one last chance.   
“You have no right to tell me these things after that disgusting scene you just made downstairs. And you’re still drunk.”   
“So? What, you don’t believe me, cause I’m drunk?” The corners of his eyes were crinkling.   
She buried her face in her hands from complete desperation of the two of them ever working. Like everything was burning down.   
***  
Okay, this was super hard to write :D I had so much trouble putting everything down, the drunk!Stiles part was from a personal experience and it was sooo freaking hard! But... Well, what do you think? I’m eagerly waiting for your thoughts..! :)   
P.S. Stiles is an asshole when drunk...


	15. Please

Here you go, loves!!! :*

My headache came rushing into my head, the same way ocean hides the shore in waves of salt water. Tears somehow stopped gathering in my eyes and I took a few breaths.  
I didn’t know what to say to him. He stood close to me and I could smell the alcohol on his breath, it made me sick. I didn’t lift my eyes just yet, but I think he was crying. That soundless cry. He wasn’t sobbing, but the tears were on his cheeks, as a sign of the heartbreak we both put ourselves and each other through.  
I pulled myself together and finally looked up at him. He was staring at me with sad bloodshot eyes and I believe mine mirrored his.  
Stiles was waiting for me to talk. I had absolutely no idea what he wanted to hear. Did he want me to tell him I was in love with him? After that disgusting scene he made downstairs? Remembering that, fire burned the edges of my already messed up mind and I shivered.  
I’m not even sure how much time we just stood there looking at each other, but I knew I couldn’t handle it for much longer. How the hell did we end up here?  
So I did the only thing I could. I turned to the door in attempt to leave the room. Suddenly his lacrosse T-shirt felt uncomfortable on my body and not in a good way.  
He stopped me just when I was grabbing the handle of the door.  
“Lydia.”  
“Please just let me go, Stiles.”  
“No.”  
“Stiles.”  
“No.”  
I blinked to calm myself, one hand on the door knob, the other one gripped by Stiles. He held me almost gently, like he was giving me a choice of staying or walking away.  
“Just let me go,” I whispered.  
“Are you leaving?”  
“Yes.”  
“Please don’t leave.” His voice got heavy and barely there, and I had to look away to stop the upcoming pile of tears. Stop it. _Stop it stop it stop it…_  
“I know you’re in love with me…” Stiles whispered in a stronger voice. Heat radiated through my body and blurred my vision, my breathing hitched.  
“Stop it.” I said closing my eyes.  
“I know you’re in love with me.” He repeated clearly.  
“I’m not…” I lied weakly.  
His hands lifted and slid over my teary cheeks, holding me almost tenderly. I was forced to look at him and he looked troubled. He looked bad.  
“You are.” He protested and I could feel the whiskey soaking his words and reaching my nostrils. “I know. It’s the way you look at me, Lydia. That is the same way I look at you.”  
I felt week in my knees and swallowed my tears. I hated this. I hated crying and sobbing and…  
I hated heartbreak. That bloody heart was broken too many times already.  
Still gazing at his deep brown eyes I lifted my hands and my small palms covered his. It was there for a second, the look on his face, like he expected me to stay this way, to agree with him, to stop this pit of sadness we were both in.  
But I gently pulled his hands away from my face and stepped back, leaving him stunned.  
I was actually surprised I was still standing on my feet. My eyes were small and my knees felt like jelly. Still nothing was worse than the look on his face. He looked like he was punched in the throat and his heart was soaked dry.  
Stiles blinked every time I took a step back to the door.  
“Please?” He laughed humorlessly. “I’m in love with you.”  
I shook my head and yanked the door open with everything I had. It felt ten times harder to open it and it felt even worse to step away and leave him there. His eyes lost all focus and his lips were parted. It was fucking worse than stabbing something in his eye. We were so bad to each other, so dysfunctional…  
“I know.” I whispered just before stepping completely out of the room. Part of me wanted to say that I am too. I wanted to give him some comfort, anything; I wanted to tell him I loved him, something! But my words got caught up in my throat when his words started refreshing in my memory.  
_You couldn’t even find your way through the shit that’s going in that crazy head of hers!_  
_And she got issues too. Daddy issues._  
_What, are you seeing your father yet? Am I too much yet?!_  
So I left the room without any other word and slammed the door behind me. Allison and Scott were standing in the hall near the stairs. They were both leaning against opposite sides of walls.  
Their eyes shot up immediately and I saw concern colored looks on both of them.  
That was when tears finally really crept in. For some reason I nodded to them slowly and started walking towards them. Allison met me halfway, then brushed my tears away with a gentle movement of her hands.  
Scott walked to us and put a comforting hand on my shoulder. He squeezed it and I nodded again, offering him a weak smile.  
“He’s just…” He started and I didn’t have the power to ask him not to. I didn’t want him to defend his best friend, or the opposite. I wasn’t sure I would be able to control myself when he did. “I should’ve warned you. That he was going to fuck up. He doesn’t let…people get close and for some reason he let you and… Lydia I’m sorry.”  
“It’s okay, Scott.” I brushed it off with another smile. “It’s not your fault.”  
“I know. I still am…” He said gloomily.  
xxx  
Allison took me to our dormitory that same night or… morning, so I wouldn’t have to sleep at his place. She stayed with me in our room; she didn’t go back to Scott. I heard her talking on the phone with him in the kitchen and closed my eyes. I felt so tired.  
So I curled up in my bed without even covering myself with a blanket. Still, I didn’t have the power to take away his T-shirt. Sleep didn’t welcome me and I realized this was the first time I was sleeping alone for… a long time.  
“Hey, baby.” Allison walked in to the room and put the phone on the table. I smiled to her, but I was sure it didn’t convince her.  
“You should get some sleep.” She said quietly, kneeling near my bed and taking my hand in hers. That moment I thanked all the Gods for her and her support.  
“What did Scott say?”  
Her eyes got wary and she seemed to consider her answer.  
“He’s going to sleep too. It’s almost eight. The sun is up.”  
“Allison.”  
She looked at me with her big but tired eyes and nodded, understanding what I wanted to hear.  
“He’s… Not good. He kicked everybody out. Idiot. At eight in the morning. And half of them are high.” She rolled her eyes. “Scott said he took a shower. Willingly. Uhm… I don’t know, he said he’s not holding up.”  
She sighed after that but I didn’t answer. She got up after giving me a kiss on the cheek and I wrapped my hands around me. I closed my eyes and with an aching chest, waited to get some sleep.  
I managed to avoid him for two days. My education suffered, since I missed two whole days of classes. I did absolutely nothing over these forty eight hours, just cleaning our place. Allison brought me clothes from Stiles’ place. Not all of them, but I was grateful.  
Scott came over on Tuesday, giving me a tight hug and I smiled, gripping onto his taller frame.  
We tried making small talk when eating ice cream, but I guess my face betrayed my eagerness to know how he was.  
“He’s crazy pissed at me right now.” He kept his voice low. “I managed to keep him from going here and making a scene.”  
“I’m sorry,” I said genuinely, pulling my knees to my chest and hugging them tightly. “I hate it that you’re involved in this, Scott…”  
He shot me a sad smile.  
“Lydia, you are his first love. Of course I was going to be involved.”  
I covered my face with my hands and shook my head. Damn it. I was so deep in this mess.  
“I want to talk to him.” I confessed.  
“And tell him what?!” Allison asked.  
“Anything. Hello, for example! I miss him. I missed talking to him, that’s it.”  
“Lydia…”  
“I know. I know that he humiliated me in front of all my friends, I know what he did. He gathered all worst things about me and threw it in my face. I know, Allison.”  
They looked at me like I was a hurt puppy and I got harsher.  
“And stop looking at me like I’m sick. I’ll be fine. Eventually.”  
At these words someone knocked at the door. _Stiles_ , I immediately thought.  
Scott and Allison probably thought exactly the same because my best friend was looking at me intensely, while Scott’s eyes started shooting to me and doors, the doors and back to me.  
Since I was closest to the door, I got up, but I couldn’t help the sinking feeling in my stomach if it was actually him. My bare unsteady feet got me to the door and after taking a breath I clicked it open.  
“Hey, Bambi…”  
He looked exhausted. His hair even if was messy all the time, now looked like something just had a party on top of his head. He was paler than usual and dark circles were hugging his brown eyes. His pupils were dilated, just like the first time we met and I couldn’t stop myself.  
“You look like hell…” Words left my mouth before I could think of it.  
He offered an awkward smile.  
“Yeah, I’ve been through there couple times these days.”  
I tightened my arms around me and he looked me up and down, then behind me.  
“Hey.” He said calmly to the couple on the couch.  
They didn’t say anything back to them and his eyes returned to my face. Oh no. He was looking at me with his miserable expression, hurt one, bad… I didn’t have enough power to stand against that look for much longer.  
I had no idea how to tell him that I miss him and I need him even after what he did, and the things he said.  
“We’ll talk later, okay?” I said quietly.  
“No. No, we need to talk.”  
Stiles took my hand and gently tugged me forwards to the hall, to get some privacy. I closed the door behind me and waited for him to say something.  
“I’m sorry, Lydia.” He spoke.  
I wanted to hug him then, but I knew I had to stay stronger. I must. So I just nodded at him and saw a glimmer of hope in his eyes that hurt more than anything else.  
“I know you are.” I breathed out.  
He looked like he wanted to smile but I didn’t give him anything back. So he furrowed his eyebrows again and looked down.  
“When you left… I don’t know. I can’t even explain it. Please, please come back. I know I fucked up but… Damn it, that’s who I am. I’m sorry I can’t help it, but you get under my skin like no one else and I’m not… I need you, Lydia. You’re my best friend, so just… Please. Come back, I know you love me. I know we can work through this.”  
He came closer and I shut my eyes closed when he cupped my face with his warm hands.  
“Stop it, Stiles.”  
“Please.”  
“Dammit.” I said and pulled away from him, trying to avoid the scene in the dormitory hall.  
“You’re not making it any easier.” I said.  
“I’m not trying to make it easier. We are not easy okay?”  
He stepped closer again and brought his face to mine. Familiar warmth filled my cheeks and he traced his fingers from my cheek to my jaw, then to my neck.  
I shivered.  
He stopped his lips a few millimeters away from mine. I couldn’t breathe, my heart was racing but not from anger or sadness. It was because I wanted to kiss him.  
“Tell me you love me.” He murmured shadowing my lips.  
He brought his forehead against mine and we breathed the same air, slowly, trying to find our composure. But it was impossible as long he was this close to me. I spoke in a raspy voice.  
“You’re ruining me.”  
“You _ruined_ me.”  
I looked up to his eyes and they were sad. This was the first time I saw his eyes like this. They were…miserable before, but now he just looked simply… sad. The brown had some sort of shadow in them.  
“Go home, Stiles.”  
His eyebrows pulled in.  
“ _You are_ my home.”  
His words cut me but I slid away. I was so unstable, he made me so unstable! I wanted to forgive him but I had no idea if I could do that and I wanted him to leave at the same time.  
Me and him, we weren’t functional, we weren’t normal. We were just a mess. He knew it. I did too. I just hoped that we were worth fighting for.  
“I know you love me.” He stated.  
“You said that already.” I responded, shaking my head.  
“Lydia, what we have is so much bigger than…” Stiles licked his lips furiously and his cheeks got a little more color.  
It looked like he physically strained himself from rushing towards me but his fingers balled into fists and he took a breath.  
“You can’t blame all of this on me. We both have shadows. Okay? Maybe I’m temperamental and insecure and yes, I got drunk when things got rough, but you are not even able to forgive me. And yes, I’m pissed that you told me about your father, but…”  
“See?!” Something boiled inside of me and I cut him off. “You wish I hadn’t told you! You wanted me to be open, to tell you what I feel, then you make every single move too soon and what do you expect from me?” I shook my head before he could respond. “You don’t love me, you love this…version of me, you love the idea of me, you love the idea of owning me. You wish I hadn’t told you about my father and my fucked up past, well guess what, it’s all you get. This is my package, you either deal with it or not. And that party, that morning… You just showed me that you can’t.”  
He closed his eyes after my speech and I was happy that he did. I would’ve just broken down if I saw his damn eyes just then.  
When my eyes finally met his gaze as we were standing there, staring at each other, time stopped. Those eyes were piercing mine, and I could’ve sworn at that moment he sensed the real me. The one without the attitude, without the anger, without the messed up personality.  
“You know…” Stiles’ voice was husky now. “It never occurred to me that we wouldn’t make it. I’ve said goodbye to a lot of people, Lydia. Didn’t think I’d be saying goodbye to you.” Corner of his lips turned up and it was an offering of a smile. At least an attempt to it.  
I didn’t try to mirror it. I wanted to crash in to him for just one second, to hug the hell out of him and kiss his worry away. But we had so much going on against us.  
Our silence held the most awful goodbye and I wasn’t sure if he wanted me to say it, or if he wanted to do the honors.  
My mouth opened to speak but these vivid thoughts of everything good that happened to us… Stopped me.  
“I’m sorry.” I whispered.  
He stepped away.  
“Don’t be. This isn’t over.”

WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK??? PLEASE LET ME KNOW IMMEDIATELY :* Love you all :) No, I seriously do, you make my life so much brighter… :)


	16. The only one

LYDIA

On Friday night I did the strangest thing. Ally kept pushing me to go out, but I told her that I wanted to…  
Ugh. What the hell Lydia.  
Yeah, so? I wanted to look at stars that night.  
I think that we are like stars. Something always happens to burst us open.  
Like Stiles happened.

I leaned my head back on the chair in the balcony, gripping hot cocoa in my hands. He loves it! When we were living together I used to tease him about that all the time. He liked it with milk. He actually had a weird obsession with milk.  
I smiled at the memory and suddenly felt like an eighty year old. That was probably what missing someone so damn much felt like.  
My cellphone in the pocket suddenly felt ten times heavier.  
Damn it.  
Was it a good idea?  
I took another sip and held the cup to my lips. It was a chilly night. And it’s been three chilly nights since I saw Stiles. He left with “It’s not over.”  
I shivered, but not because of the cold.  
Damn it.  
I missed him so much. Maybe he was right? I made so many mistakes in my life just because of this ugly habit of not being able to forgive. I wanted so much from having him in my life, but he screwed up.  
God. I screwed up.  
We were both at fault. There was no other way to put it. So I guess I just needed to ask myself if all of it was worth it?  
I closed my eyes lightly…  
 _I love your smell. And your hair. And your lips. Like… I’m crazy about it._  
“Ally!”  
xxx  
She asked me like three times if I wanted to do this. I really wanted, I just wasn’t sure if it was a good idea. Wow, that pretty much summed up my whole relationship with Stiles.  
I swayed on my heels while Allison was talking to Scott on the phone. Something kept rolling over my stomach and it wasn’t butterflies. Anxiety, probably.  
What was I gonna say to him? That I wanted to make things right? That I missed him? That I was sorry for being such a jackass?  
Yeah, okay, that is exactly what I was going to say to him, but I was sure as hell, words would freeze over my throat as soon as I see him.  
I tugged my skirt uncharacteristically lower, probably showing Allison how nervous I was. I had to say I was sorry. I had to.

xxx

STILES

“Are you sure about this?” Scott asked me carefully, starting the engine. I almost chuckled.  
“Yeah, man. I’m sure. If she has any interest in seeing me again, if I’m actually getting that chance then yes, I am taking it.” I shook my head, almost to myself, eyeing the dark night upon us. “I have to.”  
He nodded and offered me a smile. God, I put him through hell lately. He understood perfectly, how low I was and he helped me. And not in a “a pat on the back and let’s watch some porn” kind of way. I was mostly thankful because he talked to me, and asked me if she had called me, and he asked me if I wanted to talk to Allison. Ever since Lydia left something was missing in the apartment. My bed, my heart.. Certainly my mind. The way I saw it… She was it. My only chance. My only. That was it. And I wasn’t sure what she was doing to me, but I couldn’t fight it anymore.  
At the same time… I was sure I couldn’t chase her forever. If she didn’t want anything to do with me I wasn’t going to make her. Just because she was everything to me, didn’t mean I was the same to her.  
Of course, every bone literally ached at the thought. I didn’t want to believe for one second that I wasn’t as important to her. She was my Bambi.  
Scott pulled over, pulling me out of my own silent thoughts and I saw her blue car in the diner’s parking lot. Something rushed through me from head to toe. The air left my lungs, and with everything I had I took a breath. I felt a little bit like having a minor asthma attack. Nodding to myself, I stepped out of the car, Scott doing the same thing. My jelly-like legs moved to the door, and I swallowed. Damn it, I felt like a… Kitten. So small and disoriented. But I had little claws, I swear. I was… Actually, mostly, I guess, okay with being friends?  
I guess?  
I mean I think I could really try. Absolutely. I could. I could probably stop myself from wanting to kiss her and touch her…  
Yeah, no, I probably couldn’t.  
My spine straightened and I gaped at the diner, tearing the door open with a quick movement.  
 _Well. Fuck it._  
She was standing there, looking more beautiful than…ever. Yeah, she wasn’t pretty, she was hands down beautiful. Her adorable flushed cheeks indicated that she was also nervous, but I could barely focus on them, as I ate all of her with my eyes, and I couldn’t stop. My pupils were probably dilated, my brown eyes peering into her, and it was as if everything had suddenly gotten purpose in the world again.  
Her short skirt traveled up her legs, and for the first time, I think, I saw her wearing flats. She was so lovely… It was like as if she fed my soul and my stupid stupid heart, along with my crazy impulsive head.  
You know there are these moments, that are worth more than anything in the world? You just stop.  
I sighed, when as sweet as candy flashback crawled up in my damaged in-love brain. She looked prettiest wrapped up in my sheets, in my T-shirt, next to me, warming me.  
“Stiles?” Scott smiled and poked my arm.  
I nodded, and walked over to them. I was happy I wasn’t the only one that nervous. Her eyes moved like an independent organism with joy, laughter, amazement, and despair. I hadn’t seen a face so vivid and expressive in ages, and I enjoyed watching it live and move.  
“Hello, Bambi.” I greeted her and that caused her to smile. My heart started pounding hundred times more, and I know it’s just words, but my whole body reacted to her smile.  
I was afraid she wasn’t saying hello. Without another word, she reached her small hands to me, and shyly stepped forward. It was like watching a little girl give her kindergarten crush a hug, except I was that kindergarten crush! Ignoring everything else in the world, Allison, Scott, bunch of people around us, I met her halfway and as gently as I could..I wrapped my arms around her.  
You know that moment when you hug somebody, when your heart feels warm and high in your chest and tingly? When you feel just for a second like a baby in a womb… that nothing matters?   
I tried, really tried hugging her softly. She was the one who hugged me hard. Maybe a little too hard, not that I was against it.  
Lydia’s scent had something so so sweet in it, like caramel, and wild dreams, her green eyes and sugar…  
“Thank you,” I whispered to her hair, not actually sure what I was thanking for. She responded with a breath on my neck.  
“I’m sorry.”  
I pulled away and looked at her. Her pretty face now wore real seriousness on her face, and I believed I mirrored her.  
Allison was the one who broke it.  
“So… You want to eat something, or do you want to just..eat each other?”  
“Please stop.” I cringed, with the fear that she was making Lydia feel uncomfortable. But her pink lips curved into a sweet small smile and I relaxed a little. I had really no idea what she wanted from tonight, calling us, wanting to meet.  
It seemed like hours passed, both of us just staring at each others eyes. I had no idea what she saw that held her, but I couldn’t look away either. She was giving me that look again, the one that made me feel like I could do anything. I was so naked under her gaze. Skin was just that: skin. But when her green eyes were peering through me… I swear to God I felt.. Stripped.

xxx

LYDIA

My eyes were almost watering. I couldn’t believe how much seeing him affected me. There was no backing down, I was an open book. And he could perfectly see it.  
We started walking towards the table, when he blurted out a provoking question. Well, I didn’t believe it was blurting out. Something told me it was considered and thought of, maybe a question of hope, just craving for a positive answer?  
“Did you miss me?”  
I shrugged.  
“A little bit.” I teased in a small voice.  
“Your eyes are wide and watery.” He noted with a soft grin. “I think you missed me more than a little.”  
To my surprise, Stiles tilted his head and looked me in the eye, appearing oddly…crestfallen.  
“Don’t be nervous,” he said. “I hate making you nervous.”  
My mouth parted at his unexpected words, and I was happy that I was given an opportunity to sit the hell down, we had reached the table.  
“That’s never been a problem before.” I responded calmly.  
“Yes, well I was the stupidest man on the planet before, Bambi.”  
“Careful.” I muttered to him. You’re talking about the man I care about, I thought to myself.  
We couldn’t focus, we couldn’t even talk to Allison or Scott. I felt like laughing, or smiling the whole time. And I didn’t know if that was because I was so happy seeing him again, or, simply awkward and nervous. I wasn’t awkward and I wasn’t nervous. Although, I wasn’t a lot of things, before I met Stiles.  
He sighed loudly, and I lifted my eyes to him. His face was frustrated, it looked like he was annoyed by being here. Before I could ask a simple question, he turned to me.  
“You want to go…eat?”  
I looked around, smiling. I knew what he meant, and that made my insides curl, but I still held his eyes.  
“Because there’s no food here?”  
Stiles narrowed his eyes at me and showed me a peek of his tongue.  
Well. Fuck.  
“Come on let’s just. Get out of here. Anywhere.” He insisted.  
His brown eyes were so seductive. I felt my smile growing wider, but it was stopped by common sense.  
“I’m not sure that’s the best idea.”  
“Oh, it is.”  
“Stiles,-”  
“Okay, I’ll play it this way, you left your skirt in my apartment, we’re going to get it okay?”  
I rolled my eyes at him but his expression was so soft, I almost melted. Like a freaking caramel candy.  
“Stiles, if we go to the apartment, I’m just going to stay and…”  
“I know.” He interrupted quietly, but I couldn’t hear any agendas in his purring voice.  
He was such an adorable image right there, right then. His messy hair were still… Well, messy. His eyes were, I couldn’t say pleading, more like panting and hopeful. I received this amazing smile from him, the genuine one, almost a pouty one, and my face fell into seriousness again, I was afraid I might do something stupid.  
Like planting my lips on his.  
“Just to talk. I missed you. Big time.” He added eventually.  
My body temperature raised to a dangerous number, but I nodded, slowly getting up.

xxx

STILES

We drove home in quiet. It was so funny, saying home. In the same sentence as “we”.  
When I opened the door for her, she stepped inside without giving it another thought. My breathing slowed down, the fear of being rejected felt smaller and smaller.  
She looked around, still standing in the hall, but I could see her minds were somewhere else. It wasn’t hard guessing where, but I wasn’t sure she was comfortable with starting all of this just like that.  
Lydia was so achingly beautiful. Slowly, simply taking a chance, I slid my fingers to hers. And then I felt the world stop, because she leaned against me, resting her head on my shoulder.  
We stood in the shadows, and I couldn’t even see straight, I wanted to do the right thing and I was afraid I’d screw it all up.  
“I’m sorry.” I started simply.  
She nodded to that, not looking at me yet. But I could feel her little fingers holding onto mine a little tighter.  
“I know. I am too.”  
I shook my head, speaking in a husky voice.  
“I know I was too much. No one should go from meeting to I love you in a minute. I shouldn’t have put this weight on you.”  
Lydia turned to me, staring at me deeply. She tilted her head.  
“That’s true. But it was my fault too. I was on the same road, Stiles, it’s just that you were brave enough to go for it. I was at fault just as you…”  
“Lydia, that’s…”  
“I’m sorry I tried to make this easy, Stiles.”  
I furrowed my eyebrows.  
“None of this is easy.”  
“I know. And, honestly… I’ve tried staying away from you. And I’ve tried ignoring how I feel about you. But…” She stuttered, the pause matching the one in my breathing. “It’s like fighting a losing battle. And I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want to ignore it anymore. I’m sorry I was the smaller person in this…”  
Before either of us could say another word, we both jumped by the sound of her ring tone.  
Lydia rolled her eyes and still holding my hand, answered her phone with another.  
My body had no powers whatsoever. I felt like laying down, or melting.  
“No, Ally. You won’t have to pick me up. No. No. Because I’m staying at his place.”  
At her words air left my lungs, which probably just left them completely dry, but I didn’t give half of fuck. I gripped her hand tighter.  
She was staying.  
I eyed her curiously, when she pouted adorably at something Allison asked or said.  
“Because I think I’m in love with him.”  
Her green eyes met mine and there was absolutely nothing else in the world. No ground. No air. No God. No nothing.  
Her.  
Maybe it was my imagination? Did she just say that?  
Smile crept up on my now eager lips, but I believe my eyes didn’t match them. I felt stunned, happy and disoriented. More than that. Lost. Completely.  
Bambi was in love with me.  
Still holding my look, she smiled somewhat shyly and hung up the phone without even glancing at it again. Without listening to Allison squeaking on the other end.  
I felt like I was the only one that mattered to her. Right then.  
We were so not easy. Sooo messy. Such little disasters…  
“You love me?” I breathed out.  
Lydia shrugged.  
“I like your bed.” She joked and that did it completely.  
Joy burst out of me and I picked her up, in the dark hall of my apartment, hugging her tightly.  
She wrapped her small hands around my neck, and her legs found their way around my middle, I supported her with my hands.  
Bambi was in love with me.  
 _Bambi was in love with me._

_PLEASE GIVE REVIEWS!!! They give me life! What do you think? Love you all. For those of you didn't know, I was suffering from a chronicle insomnia for this past month, where I wasn't able to write anything :) I could barely do anything. Anyway! Thank you for reviews!_

_Smutty smutty smut in chapter 17….._

**Author's Note:**

> Give a review, please! :)


End file.
